I had known Don and his wife Tina for years. My wife Candy and Tina grew up together and have been best friends since birth basically. By osmosis, Don and I became friends over the years, despite being very different personalities.
Don is about 6 years younger than me (I am 48) and a lot less motivated. I went to college and earned an MBA and advanced to VP of Operations for my company. Don came from successful parents but did not do well in school, mainly due to lack of effort.
To appease his parents, he signed up for the army when he had no interest in college. He claims he was special ops and did a stint in Iraq. He used an old knee injury as an excuse for a medical discharge, two years early. Eventually he took a job as an auto mechanic. Even then, he never volunteers for overtime or in any way works to advance his career beyond basic grease monkey.
He does however always have time to watch sports and drink beer, which is basically the basis for our friendship. We get together to watch, The Chiefs, The Sooners, The Thunder or The Royals once a month or so.
Cindy works as a social worker, so money is tight for them. While my salary alone dwarfs their combined incomes, Candy is a corporate attorney, so we earn several times their income. Because of this Don has always felt inadequate compared to me. That animosity has kept our friendship somewhat distant. Despite Tina and Candy being so close we have rarely done things together as couples.
We took a group vacation, one time, to the Bahamas right after Candy Graduated law school. Don was so uptight about money the trip was basically a dud. He would not let us help by paying for some activities, so we only partook of free activities where we could bring our own beer. We beached and hiked for a week, eating sandwiches and cheap fast food.
After that, Candy and Tina began taking a "Lady's Week" vacation and have for almost 20 years. I would usually go with my son (our only child) on a "Boy's Week" when the ladies did their thing. Now that he was in college, that tradition may be gone for good. Of course, Don usually spent the week drinking beer and watching sports.
So, this year I was home alone while Candy and Tiny had their week. As a result, Don and I decided to get together for the OKC Thunder game Friday night, after I took the girls to the airport. They were heading to San Diego. For beaches, shopping and spa time. Lucky for Candy, Tina did not mind if Candy paid for things, so money would not be a stressor for Candy (particularly with Ron).
We lived in a High-end housing development outside of Kansas City. Ironically, we lived right next door to Tina and Don. When we bought our house, it was next to Don's parents' house. Candy saw it and loved it so much, we had to get it.
I never quite imagined it would end up as Don's house. I had assumed he would never be able to afford it, but his parents, at least, planned well and left him the house. It was fully paid for with the funds to retain it and pay taxes and expenses for the rest of his life. His pay went for food, utilities, beer and their gym membership.
I, on the other hand, worked my way through college and climbed the ladder from the ground up to purchase our house and pay off the mortgage. My family did not have much money, so I had to claw my way up. Don's house was free, and apparently not appreciated since he can barely manage to leave the gym or the couch, long enough to mow the lawn. Don was a perfect example that you can't appreciate the value in things if you don't earn them yourself.
The other thing he always seemed to have money for was tattoos. He seemed to get something added every year. He stopped showing them to me, as It was clear from my reaction, I thought they were trashy and ugly. That was part of my problem with Don. I did not do a good job of hiding my emotions or thoughts when it came to him. It's not that I thought I was better than him, it's just that I did not respect him, because everything was handed to him and I have had to work for everything I have.
I would never get a tattoo or grow my hair long. I dress for success and work hard. This mentality has paid off over and over. Don doesn't work hard or try to work hard. He has tats on his arms and legs and long black hair he puts in a pony tail sometimes. I just cannot grasp living like him, and my disgust shows on my face from time to time.
This added to his feelings of inadequacy and made it uncomfortable for the four of us to do things as a group. His feelings are magnified when his wife sees firsthand what a motivated person can accomplish. So, over the years we have developed our social patterns that have worked so far.
I think there was also some jealousy over our son Justin. Tina has a medical condition that does not allow an egg to implant in her uterus, so they have never had kids. I tried to speak to Don about adoption a few times, but he cut the conversations off. That also added to the tension of group activities.
It is another shortcoming of mine that I never told him how much I admired his acceptance of Tina's condition. I would have guessed his fragile ego would not allow him to deal with the situation without blaming her or rubbing it in her face that she prevented him from having a legacy. It was quite the opposite. He managed to make it clear that he loved her and did not feel like he was missing anything.
He did play catch with Justin and went to his sporting events when I was traveling for work. I think that helped him to fill the void, not having his own child left in his life. I just wished he had been more productive in life. Maybe, he would be able to afford a surrogate or other medical solution.
Because of his ego we developed parameters for our sports get-togethers. We had to meet at his house at least half of the time. I could only bring a 12 pack and maybe one snack item and that is it. As time went on, there were less and less get-togethers at my house. For the last couple years, it has been strictly at Don's house.
Friday evening, I dropped the ladies at the airport about 7 and got to Don's in time for tip-off. OKC was playing the Lakers and I decided what the hell. I was on my own and still enjoy the fact we own the Lakers now. Always good to watch the Thunder slap up on the Lakers. I brought a twelve of Michelob Long necks and Doritos.
Don greeted me at the door wearing sweats and an OKC T. I had on jeans and a Westbrook Jersey. We went on down to the man-cave in the basement. His father added it not long before he died. There were 2 recliners with, heat and massage and sound if you wanted. Don had splurged for a fifty-inch 4K, a nice setup for watching games.
I loaded the 12 pack into the fridge after pulling out two. We downed them quickly watching the pregame talking heads.
"I got something for us to try," he said, jumping up from his recliner and going to the fridge. "One of my Ops buddies showed me this concoction. It's good and sneaks up on you a little. Let me know what you think."
He brought out a large tumbler of ice and a yellow colored drink in a pitcher. He poured two glasses full. I took a sip, and it had a touch of lemon, but a sweet overall flavor and a kick of Tequila at the end.
"Not bad. It seems a little frou-frou for you though. You like this?" I asked surprised.
"I do, and it has a kick. We have to introduce this to the ladies. He tells me, he gets lucky a lot more often when he gives his wife this stuff." he said smiling and plopping back into the recliner.
"Some of us don't need to get our wives drunk to get laid," I said joking.
I quickly realized this was another case of me coming off as arrogant. A good example of the tension that always existed between us. I thought about trying to step it back but didn't, even though I would take any help to increase sex with Candy. Between work hours and stress, we were lucky to make love once a month.
"I think Candy will love this. How do you make it?" I asked hoping to cut the tension.
"It's a secret recipe. If I told you I would have to kill you," he said raising an eyebrow like The Rock.
"It does go down smooth, I can see how it could bite you later" I replied, taking a big drink. It was rather addictive, and we had knocked out the pitcher before the end of the first quarter.
"Want some more or do you want to go less frou-frou?" he asked sarcastically
