(This is part four in a series and will make much more sense if you read them all in order)
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My Daddy started talking to me in a calm sweet voice as he turned me over to get to my hands. He unwrapped the duct tape from my wrists and I let out a moan of pain as I moved my arms forward. I rolled back over onto my back and my Daddy was looking down at his naked 18 year old daughter. I closed my eyes and turned my head. I was ruined to him. How could he ever love me the same again? I felt a blanket moving over me. I started to cry again.
I am starting to get a little worried as I walk through the neighborhood. How far was the diner? It didn't seem like it had been far but am I headed in the right direction? I am such a loser. I am probably going to walk right into more trouble. I look around at the houses and think that is a pretty likely outcome. I just keep walking.
The police came and then the ambulance. There were a lot of people in our living room and most all of them saw me naked. Either the detectives when they said they need to see my body for signs of assault or the paramedics when they examined me or the police officers who were just standing around when I was lifted onto the gurney. Whatever, let's all look at the little raped virgin. Don't see that every day.
The rest of the day was a blur. A lot of people talked to me and I remember none of them. I am sure they gave me great information and advice but I heard nothing. The feeling of the knife in my pussy, my nipples being twisted, and the searing pain when he ripped through my virginity. That is what went through my head the rest of that day. I woke up the next morning and I was very sore. I was in bed for two days before I had the strength or desire to get up.
I remember that was the first time I felt the intense apathy hit me. My Mom asked me if I wanted a shower and I didn't really care one way or the other. I had been cleaned up obviously but not really. I didn't care if I took a shower and washed the feel of him off of me. I just shrugged. She eventually stopped asking me questions. She got tired of the shrugs. She just started doing. The warm shower did feel good.
The first week passed quickly and I did go back to school the next Monday. No one at school knew anything, just that Taylor went through something and she was different. I did get dressed nicely, well Mom dressed me nicely. I remember looking in the mirror and recognizing the girl who used to be Taylor. But the eyes were different and that girl was not me.
I keep walking and reach the end of the street. I look both ways, unsure of which way to go. I feel hopeless, I will never find my way back home. I am turning right when I hear the engine behind me. Denny pulls up beside me and looks at me. I keep walking.
"Come on honey, let me take you back to your car." He says.
"Fuck you, I will mess up your precious seat." I say and keep walking.
"I am so sorry. I never wanted to hurt you and I was an idiot." He says.
I stop and look at him. I shake my head and keep walking.
"What do I need to do to convince you? I like you. I was stupid, can we start over?" He says.
He pulls up next to me. I stop and think about my situation. Get on the bike and get back to my car or keep walking and most likely get raped and killed. I seriously consider the raped and killed option before I swing my leg over his seat and scoot up behind him. He has me at my car in a matter of minutes. I get off the bike and open my car door. I start the car and pull away without looking at him.
Mom is sitting at the kitchen table when I walk in. I must look horrible because she gasps as I walk into the kitchen. I remember our shopping trip as soon as I look at her.
"Oh Mom, I am sorry." I say.
"Where have you been? I called Max and he said you got on a motorcycle with a boy." She says.
I don't know what to say. Well, Mom I took a ride to a biker house and got gang-fucked. No, that won't go over good. Well, Mom this boy paid me $500 to fuck me and two of his friends fucked me accidentally. Not much better.
"Taylor, where were you and what were you doing?" Mom says, her voice rising.
I can feel my agony rising and I start to cry.
"What has happened to you? Talk to me." She says.
"Oh, I don't know Mom, maybe I got brutally fucking raped in my own living room? That would be a good start." I say and turn to leave the room.
I hear her crying behind me and I think I hear an apology before I hit the stairs. I go into my room and fall onto my bed. I cry for a while and then curl up into a ball. I feel something stabbing me and I reach into my uniform pocket and pull out the wad of money and a piece of paper.
"Sweetheart, Don't give up."
I fall asleep crying, holding the crumpled paper. I wake up and I feel crusty. The cum has dried on my thighs and it feels gross. I am so dirty. I crawl out of bed and slip out of my uniform. My panties and bra are gone and I have no idea where they are. I walk into the bathroom and take a shower. The warm water brings me back to life for a moment. I finish, slip into my robe and go into my room. My uniform is on the floor and it is filthy. I pick it up and carry it to the washing machine. I stuff it in and start the washer.
I should be hungry but I'm not. I sit in my room and comb my wet hair while the washer finishes. I move the uniform to the dryer and go to bed. I am asleep the minute my head hits the pillow. I dream of my rape again and wake up the next morning screaming. My Mom is at my side and hugs me.
"Baby, it will be ok." She says and holds me.
I stop screaming and just sit in my Mom's arms. I look at the clock and see it is 6:10.
"Mom, I have to work at 8:00 but can we go shopping after please?" I whisper.
