My husband, Mike, had decided we were going for a hike up the mountains. That was fine by me. I enjoy hiking. We hopped in the car and headed north, aiming for a nice nature reserve with a couple of good hiking trails.
Now Mike is, how should I phrase this, a trifle competitive, and not always over-nice about how he wins. Heading towards the reserve we were cruising down a two-lane main road. Mike was driving, naturally, and also speeding a little. Again, naturally. We passed a sign warning that one lane dropped out and that the traffic had to merge.
Now there was a car a little way in front of us and Mike was overtaking him quite quickly, but it was plain that we weren't going to pass him before the double lane vanished. Common sense said to just pull in behind him as he was doing the legal limit. Instead, Mike's competitive edge kicked in, he leaned on the accelerator and did his best to pass before our lane vanished.
Now as far as I could see it was going to be a tie, with the other car maybe a little in front. So Mike leaned on his horn and moved towards the other guy. He at least had the common sense to slow down and let Mike pass. He gave us a nasty look as we passed but Mike was waving a finger at him and leaving him rapidly behind.
There was a speed trap further down the road, wasn't there. One guess who got pulled over. The cop didn't want to hear anything that Mike had to say, just writing out a ticket and handing it to him, wishing us a nice day, but to drive a little slower. Mike's attitude wasn't improved by the fact that the car he'd forced to yield right of way sailed by as we got ticketed, the driver looking at us with a big smile.
Mike's mood deteriorated even more when he found himself tailing the other guy, who was now driving well below the speed limit. Deliberately, I'm sure. When another car caught up with us he managed to kick his car's speed up a notch so as not to cause other people any delays.
Oddly enough the first car turned into the parking area we were going to use. It was rather occupied and we both started cruising around looking for a space. We were still behind, so when we spotted a vacant space it was plain that the other guy would get it. He turned on his indicator and stopped the other side of the vacant spot, his reverse lights coming on, showing he was going to reverse into the spot. He looked behind just in time to see Mike swing straight into the spot.
I'm afraid that both Mike and I gave him a nasty smirk, but there wasn't much he could do. He just gave us a cold look and drove on. Mike and I walked across to the small shop attached to the Park Ranger's station, intending to pick up maps and snacks for the hike. Would you believe it, the guy from the other car was walking into the shop as we approached. He'd found a spot right outside the Ranger's station.
We found the stuff we wanted and approached the checkout, only to find ourselves behind that guy again. How the hell did he manage to get in front all the time? Mike just jumped forward and pushed in front of him, smirking and daring him to make something of it. The guy just gave Mike a bland look and told the girl on the checkout to serve Mike first.
"It'll get him out of here that much faster," he added.
Mike gave him a filthy look, paid for his stuff and we left and headed off up one of the two main paths. Looking back I could see the guy watching which way we went, then he deliberately waved to us and turned towards the other path.
It was odd, but that man had managed to get very severely up Mike's nose. Mike seemed to think that he'd lost some sort of personal competition between them. I was prepared to shrug it off, but Mike was chewing the thing over like a dog with a bone.
We settled down to our hike, with Mike checking over the map. I wondered what he was trying to learn, so I asked him.
"There's a split in the mountain," he said, indicating a narrow valley off to the side of the trail. "That's why there are two trails. One goes up either side of the split. If we could just cross the split we would finish up on the other trail and get to the top on that trail before that bastard does."
Yes, I suppose we could, but why bother? I didn't say that, though. I just pointed out that there was no bridge and so we'd have to continue the way we were going. Mike humphed and grumbled, but what else could he do? Nothing, right? Wrong, as it turned out.
We'd been hiking uphill for about an hour. Sometimes the split in the mountain was right next to us and other times the trail drifted away from it. We eventually came to this spot where our path was right next to the split and the split was very narrow. Not so narrow that you could jump across, but a lot narrower than in other places.
Which is why I considered it most unfortunate that a very tall tree had chosen that spot to fall. It's roots were next to the trail on our side of the split and the top of the branch rested easily on the other side. There was a little sign posted next to the tree. 'Danger. Keep off.'
Mike was smiling.
"I thought this might still be here," he said. "Me and some of my mates used to cross the split here. You can see how the top of the tree trunk had been worn smooth. All sort of animals cross using this old tree."
"Ah, Mike, it has a danger sign on it," I pointed out.
"Oh, that's just a legal thing," he said dismissively. "They stick those signs up all over the place. They don't mean anything."
"You're not really going to try to cross over are you?"
"Yes, we are," was the unwanted reply.
"What do you mean, we? You don't expect me to hike across that tree, do you? Look how far the drop is."
"Don't worry about it," I'm told. "Look how wide the trunk is. You could drive a car across that tree."
It'd have to be a bloody small car, in my opinion. Yes, the bole was nice and wide, but it was also long, and looked as though it was getting longer every passing second.
