I don't think I can ever get on another plane again. I'm not sure if that's from the fear of seeing him again, or the fear of confronting how he made me feel. Either way, I need a break.
I texted Jamison tonight. A simple, "Hey... I've been thinking about you. Can you come over tonight?" I don't know what I want from him, or even what I think of him, but I know he'll be a nice escape. His reply was.. weird. Just a quick, "Omw." Maybe he feels the same? Nothing serious between us, just fun. It's whatever, I guess.
As I sit on my couch and turn on a random movie, my mind accidentally wandered to Him. The things he did to me. Despite him plaguing my thoughts I quickly shut it down and force my mind back onto Jamison. When I check my phone I see that It's been about half an hour, so he should be here soon. I still can't figure out why my heart started to race at the thought.
Just as the movie is getting to a jump scare a sudden *Bang* sounds at my door. Perfect fucking timing he almost gave me a heart attack. He knocks on my door a couple more times, rather loudly, and I set my phone on the little coffee table in front of my couch and stand up. Sounds like he's aggravated about something if his lack of consideration for my door hinges were any clue.
"Coming!" I call out as I make my way to the door and start undoing all the locks. Can never be too careful when I literally have a stalker. I chuckle to myself at the thought as I undo the last chain and start to open the door, practically throwing it open to tell him to stop trying to break my shit.
As I do my heart stops.
My mind goes quiet and I feel the blood completely drain from my face as I come face to face with my stalker. The man who's been haunting my nightmares every night since the plane. Since the bar. Since.. I can't even remember when I wasn't being tormented by him anymore.
After a moment my mind finally starts working again and I get the bright idea to slam the door in his face before he can get inside, but as I do he stops it with his foot and my heart drops again. So I panic and run.
"Where are you going, little mouse," he says. I don't fucking know, but my instincts just scream at me to get away. I run to the furthest room down the hall, my bedroom, and slam the door shut. I really need to get locks on all the rooms. Still panting to catch my breath, I look around my room frantically for a weapon. You'd think I'd have a gun with everything I've gone through, but no. My proud ass thought kickboxing lessons from freshman year was enough.
Finally my eyes land on my crafting table and I spot a pair of scissors. I immediately lunge for them as I hear his muffled voice say, "Does Daddy need to teach you how to shut your door?" Then he proceeds to lock any outside help from getting in. Oh my god what will Jamison think? I don't want him to get hurt. I shove my hands in my pockets for my phone to call him, but all I feel is emptiness. Then I remember I left it on the couch.. fuck.
As I feel my mind shutting down, preparing for the worst, I press my back into the wall adjacent to the door. Eventually I slide down and sit on the floor, clutching the scissors to my chest like they're the last shred of hope. Because they literally are. I can still hear his muffled voice occasionally, as well as his footsteps as he wanders my apartment, but my mind is slowly filling with a steady buzz as I try to focus.
Until I suddenly smell bacon.
Without thinking I blurt out, "What the fuck, are you cooking in my apartment!?" That arrogant prick is seriously eating my food. That's just rude.
I need to think of a plan, because sitting here obviously isn't working.
"You fucking psycho if you don't get out right now I'm calling the cops!" No response. Did he see my phone? New plan. "It won't be long until they get here, and my friend is coming over! He will be here any minute so you better leave or else he will kick your ass!" Maybe that did it. Part of me hopes Jamison just won't show, if his text was any indicator he didn't really give a shit about me, but then my threat will be meaningless and there's no one coming to save me.
Just then I realized my grip on the scissors had relaxed as I was berating him with empty threats. Almost as If my body subconsciously knew I didn't need them because he wouldn't hurt me.
Then I hear his muffled, sarcastic voice say, "Dinner is ready, come get it while it's hot!" Jesus this guy is on something. I mean of course he's crazy, with everything he's done to me, but this is something else entirely. I guess I didn't answer quick enough because I hear him start making his way down the hall.
When I hear the first *bang* of him kicking in my office door, I jump and feel a tear slip down my cheek. Now I can't tell the difference between my heart pounding in my chest or him taking my door down. A sob escapes me, and I quickly cover my mouth to try and stifle it, but it's too late. I hear him close in on me and say, "Open the door." Ordering me like I was going to make this any easier for him. I shut my eyes and start hyperventilating, gripping the scissors tight enough it starts to sting. I can't help it now as the tears flow freely down my face.
