This is a slow burn romance series that contains femdom, humiliation, and non-consensual themes. Some chapters are far less erotic than others because this is a long series.
Chapter 21
How did we end up here?
After spending my life wanting nothing more than to get away from Julia, I suddenly couldn't imagine being without her. Summer had gone by, and the next semester was well underway. All I could do was respect the time she needed to work on herself, as I tried to move on with my life, while she seemingly was moving on with hers.
As I got further and further from the last time I had seen her, my appreciation for her only grew stronger. And it wasn't solely the positive interactions that I looked back fondly on; I had gained an appreciation for every single thing she did to me, because I now accepted the good with the bad when it came to Julia.
I felt silly for ever pretending as if I didn't enjoy all those sexual acts she forced me into. The truth was... she had always been right about the little pervert I was for her. I should have just appreciated them in the moment, because without her forcing the action, I would have never gotten to enjoy being with such a beautiful woman.
Eventually, as time went on, I started to realize that it wasn't just the sex that drew me to her. I had always been infatuated with Julia, for some reason, even when she was just my bully, picking on me as a kid.
There had always been benefits to getting picked on by her, even before we started having sex. Julia had always been the most interesting person I knew, and admittedly, it was fun to interact with her, even when she was pretending to be mean.
Looking back, I should have realized that she was going through something while taking her frustrations out on me. It's not that I'm excusing her behavior; but if anyone deserved the benefit of the doubt, it should have been her.
Time after time, her words spoke as if she only hated me. However, when I thought back to her actions alone, I should have known that she never actually hated me in the first place.
Unfortunately, by the time I came to this realization, I discovered that she was dealing with something in her life that was much bigger than our relationship. And unlike before, she wasn't telling me to stay away from her when she actually wanted to get closer deep down inside.
This time, I could tell she truly needed her space. And as someone who only wanted the best for her, I had no choice but to respect her request, because if she were to ever truly find happiness, she needed to find it within herself, while not relying on me or anyone else who was fortunate enough to be in her life.
Of course, it was a struggle every day not to pick up my phone to check how she was doing. It was even more difficult to keep myself from looking for her on campus, hoping to catch a glance of that beautiful smile once again.
All I could do now was be patient and pray that fate would bring me back into her life. However, what I cared about most, regardless of whether or not I ever saw her again, was that Julia would find her peace and overcome whatever demons she was facing that she never allowed me to see.
***
Another semester came and went, and I began losing hope of ever seeing Julia again. She was no longer on the swim team page or the student directory. I even checked her social media to see if she was okay, but it hadn't been updated in almost a year.
Still, I refrained from messaging and looking for her. She needed her space, and I was beginning to realize that I needed to just move on. Of course, I could never completely forget about her because she would always hold a special spot in my heart. For the time being, however, it just appeared that the cards would never be right for us.
Though Julia never left my mind, things started to progress with Tina. Oddly enough, I didn't feel too guilty about it either. It kind of felt as if this was what Julia wanted for me.
When all this started, when she and I first became intimate, her complaint was that I would drive a woman away if one were to ever give me a chance. Obviously, she was pushing the boundaries a bit, and probably just saying those things to tease me. But once we got to college, it started to feel as if she was truly encouraging me to get a girlfriend.
She even gave me advice before my dates with Tina. At first, I thought she was just doing it to make fun of me, but I quickly realized that her advice was actually genuine. I suppose at that point, she really did want me to get a girlfriend, especially after warning me so many times to stay away from her once we got to college.
Though I knew my heart was more invested in Julia, it was Tina that I was actually with, and our relationship had progressed much further than I ever expected. We still had communication issues from time to time, but for the most part, things were much better. The most positive sign of all, however, was that she now talked about us as if our future together had been cemented.
Interestingly enough, it was the location of our first date that ended up being such a strong staple in our relationship. Tina and I would meet there several times a week, not only to study together, but to hang out and talk about our future. We had become regulars at the coffee shop, and through the good and the bad, we were able to have constant and steady conversations with each other, doing our regular check-ins to keep our relationship healthy.
Of all things Tina and I did together, this by far was the one that made me feel most confident in our future. I appreciated the way we had a set time and place, multiple days a week, to force us to communicate. And what made me love it all the more was that this was no longer just for her benefit. We studied sometimes, but what was most important was simply spending more time together.
Despite all of that, I never could quite free myself from the memories of Julia and what she meant in my life. I even wondered from time to time what I would do if she were to reenter my life and somehow ask me to leave Tina for her. Unfortunately, no matter how much I thought about it, I just couldn't reach an answer that left me with peace.
Even when I was with Tina, I started to use that coffee shop on campus as a place where I could do my work while also getting lost in my own thoughts. I would often think about Julia there and wonder what she was doing. I even wished that she would pop in once, not so I could have a conversation with her, but just so I could see if she looked healthy and happy.
Strangely enough, I practically never saw Tina at that shop outside of our scheduled get-togethers. I found it odd since she was such a coffee lover, even more than me, though I had developed quite a dependency on caffeine myself. It wasn't that I was stalking her or anything; I just figured we would run into each other more often, but it felt like over time, I stopped seeing her there unless we agreed to meet.
One day when I was on campus, however, I walked Tina back to her dorm room after her class, and since we had a little more time than normal, she invited me in. Once inside, I noticed an empty coffee cup from that same store on her desk.
"Oh, did you already go to the shop?" I asked, thinking it was strange that she would go without me.
When she realized that I had noticed the cup, she replied, "Oh, this? Yeah, I went early this morning."
"Oh, you should have told me," I said, worried that she was extra tired that morning. "I was on campus early. I could have picked something up for you."
"That's okay, Phillip," she said with a smile. She then tossed the cup into the trash can. "That was nice of you to offer though. I'll let you know next time."
I didn't think much more of the conversation, but after my next class, I decided to go to the shop myself, now that it was on my mind. Once I got there though, I was surprised when the barista asked if my girlfriend would be showing up as well so she could get her order ready.
By now, Tina and I were regulars there, so most of the staff knew our names and our favorite orders. I thought it was quite nice of the employee to have Tina in mind, but I quickly explained to her, "It'll just be me. I don't think she would come twice in one morning."
The girl paused before raising an eyebrow at me. "Twice in one day?"
"Yeah, she came this morning."
She then scratched her head. "Hmm... I don't remember seeing her."
"Maybe it was before you got to work," I suggested, shrugging my shoulders. "She said she came here pretty early."
"I've been here the entire time because I'm working a double... But maybe I just missed her when I went to the bathroom."
Of course, I found the encounter a bit strange, but I decided to simply drop the conversation. Tina had always acted a bit odd around me from time to time, but I chose to ignore the behavior because she valued her privacy... despite it being a bit suspicious...
As fate would have it, things would only grow weirder when another strange event occurred. One busy afternoon, when I was going between the medical school building and my campus, I decided to stop at a separate coffee shop along the way. I had actually rarely been to one, outside of the one on my school campus. However, I was quite tired from waking up so early that morning, so I gave it a try.
Much to my luck, the coffee shop was owned by the same company as the one I had been going to with Tina. The inside looked very similar, and they almost had the same menu. Even the cups looked the same as the ones from the shop on campus.
After taking a moment to bask in the ambiance of the coffee shop, I soon noticed another familiar feeling as I approached the counter. I didn't get a good look at her initially, but the beautiful employee behind the counter had a comforting aura that brought calmness to me for some reason. But then, as I got closer, and she looked up, meeting my eyes with hers, I realized why such a comforting feeling had come over me once I was in her presence.
I was completely frozen, and so was she, as the world stopped on its axis, and the heavens watched us staring into each other's eyes. It was her... Julia... and I could tell she was experiencing the same emotions I was.
"Phillip?" she finally said after snapping herself out of the shocked state she was in.
Though I knew she wasn't ready to see me yet, I was just happy that fate allowed me to cross paths with her, even if it was just for a moment. With a deep breath and a smile, I replied, "Hi, Julia."
It was crazy, because I could tell she felt the same as me. She wasn't prepared to let me back into her life, but for this one moment, she suddenly smiled as her eyes softened. "How have you been?"
We both let out a chuckle in disbelief that we were finally in each other's presence again. After scratching my head, I explained, "I've just been running back and forth between campus and med school... so I figured I'd stop by for some coffee."
"You're in luck," she said, smiling as she pointed at the menu. "We just so happen to sell coffee here. Why don't you tell me your order?"
