My Mom Trusted Me with Him

[This was supposed to be short...No idea how it turned so long. Guess I wanted to relive the moment. Ok, Ok. I really wanted to relive it.]

[T/W: There are elements of abuse in the story as well as loving non-consent]

It was the summer before my senior year of high school, and I was an excited 18-year-old girl, eagerly looking forward to starting my freshman year at university in just a week.

I am Indian, and my mom was quite strict; dating was a big no-no during high school. Always felt quite jealous of my friends as I watched them go on cute dates/prom and receive gifts, love and kisses from their boyfriends.

I frequently envisioned what my first time would be like - I daydreamt of a hot handsome guy taking me out on a romantic date and sweeping me off my feet. Envisioned how we would lock eyes and have slow but intense, passionate sex with lots of kissing, cuddling, and hugging.

That's not how it went. My mom had been long-time friends with a white woman from work, who had two kids: Samantha and Jason. Sam was the same age as me, while Jason was about four years older. Jason was the stereotypical frat bro -- a bit dumb, a bit disrespectful toward women, but undeniably cute and funny. Growing up, we had a great relationship, frequently visiting each other's houses for birthdays, weddings, Thanksgivings, Christmas, etc.

One Friday night, Sam invited me to a house party hosted by one of Jason's friends. She told me that Jason was already on his way to pick me up. I was SO excited to experience my first college party and just dance! I rushed to get ready, throwing on a cute, short red tank top with my boobs almost falling out plus a white semi-transparent skirt. I quickly added jeans over it and a more modest top because, no way in hell, would my mom let me leave the house like that.

I make my way downstairs to tell my mom that I am going to a party. She said "what?? no way its so last minute" still remember her angry face...but as soon as I said Jason was picking me up I could see the tension in her face melt away and relax. She trusted him enough to let him take her daughter to a party...thinking he would be there to protect me.

He came in a nice cool looking gray car - gave my mom a hug and whisked me away. As soon as I got in the passenger seat, without saying a word I took off my modest top/jeans. Jason's jaw dropped when he saw my red top and I caught him staring at my chest like a hungry dog. I jokingly told him that he was an idiot and slapped his arm. Secretly, I felt so sexy and raunchy that he kept looking at me from the rear view mirror. I pretended not to notice and (may have) adjusted my position so he could get a better view for fun.

The house party was what you would expect, loud music, strobe lights in a packed sweaty house. The reason I was excited to finally try alcohol, and being with Jason and Sam, I felt safe to do so. I tried beer. hated it. Jason handed me a full cup of sweet jungle juice, I don't know so I drink it fast. Then another cup gets handed to me, then magically another...

I played beer pong with a girl on my team against Jason and his friend. We lost badly. Twice. And were forced to do shots for the losses. I had zero experience drinking. I didn't want to come off as a belligerent, drunken girl so tried to act normal.

That's when I noticed Jason getting closer and closer to me. Him running his hands against my stomach. Brushing his hands on my ass. then he wrapped his arm around my waist, and I pushed him away lightly... he kept touching me and holding me. Then he held my hand and whispered, "Hey Supriya, don't worry. I got you".

I have no recollection of how I got to the bedroom or in the bed. I just remember him saying "sleep it off girl. chill" as he entered the bed and cozied up in the blanket with me. The lights were on but everything was spinning and wavey. I could see Jason on the bed but was confused and kept going in and out of consciousness.

I close my eyes and suddenly wake up to my cheeks being getting kissed softly, then small pecks on my lips with increasing intensity. I don't kiss him back. I just freeze. Then he takes my arms and holds it tightly above my head and starts sucking and kissing my neck vigorously. I could feel the heavy weight of his body on mine. As he is sucking on my neck I am just confused and **think** called out "Jason, please sto-" (but honestly not sure). The next thing I recall is him struggling with freeing my arms from my top; he gets frustrated and just yanks my arm out tearing my top :( Jason starts kneading and biting my free boobs HARD - it hurt but I did absolutely nothing to stop it. He puts his hands in my skirt and I could feel his warm hands over my panties, he's rubbing it in circles and my toes just curl.

I wasn't sure what was happening. Everything felt like a dream. Then Jason tries to take off my skirt, but he's struggling...And what does me a.k.a this dumb bitch do?

I FUCKING HELP HIM BY OPENING MY ZIPPER so its easier for him to pull my skirt down.

I'm cold and fully naked at this point - panicking and feeling suffocated but also calm at the same time. I go unconscious again for a bit again.

When I wake up I feel a comforting warm hard object pressed up against my face and his hand around my neck. He was rubbing his cock all over my face and hitting me with his cock over my eye - it was the first time I had seen a cock IRL. I Remember the smell of his white veiny cock to be a little idk musky?

I open my eyes again as he's pressing on my cheeks so that I open my mouth. I tiredly just open my mouth for him so he can put his cock in my mouth. I don't resist.

I remember the taste so vividly, it had a distinct saltiness and felt hard but squishy at the same time in my mouth. Jason kept going in and out of my mouth more aggressively after each hump. I coughed up spit all over and was drooling but still not moving. (I actually had a throat bruise because of how aggressive he was).

I wake up again. Not sure how but my legs were fully spread apart and open while Jason was on top of me. I could see his face, but tbh didn't recognize him. He looked like an actual rabid animal and breathing heavy. He rests his cock at the entrance of my pussy. Jason's cock was throbbing and convulsing. I could feel my pussy just wanting to give up and loosen up.

Jason pushed his semi-hard cock forward into my pussy and entered...it hurt SO SO FREAKING BAD. Just remember wanting to scream and push him away but I don't know why I didn't do that. Despite the intense pain. I freeze and just stare at the ceiling with I think a tear running down my eye. I would occasionally see Jason laughing, moaning and biting his lips.

This is where I felt like I had an outer body experience, I was not in control of my body and could literally see the both of us. I saw him go in and out of me with a sinister smile. It was just so surreal. (The other time I had this outer body experience was the 2nd time I was traumatized by someone else some time later. )

Something that still haunts me today is that I wrapped my legs around him hard and moaned as he was fucking my painful pussy. It was a long but low pitched moan. Right after that moan I feel my pussy filling up with a hot gooey liquid. His Cum. [[[To this day Jason is the only guy to have ever came inside of me because I am not on birth control - not even my long term bf has ever fucked me raw - actually find this so hot its something special me and Jason shared together]]]

The next morning, I wake groggily wake up next to a shirtless Jason with his arm over me. Remember thinking how sexy his back was and just how innocent and peaceful he looked (I've since thought about kissing and sucking his back at least 500 times ughhh). I was very confused and it takes my a minute to realize that I am naked and parts of the night starts coming back to me. I find my skirt and see that there is some blood on the inside of it causing me to become light headed. (for some strange reason I kept this skirt hidden and tucked away in my closet).

I didn't know how to react in that moment. I didn't know what to feel. I wanted to cry but also didn't (??). I was furious but also content (??).

I quickly pushed his arm off and put my clothes on getting ready to run out.

But...then...I stayed and waited for Jason to wake up, because I did not want him to be mad at me. He was also my ride home.

I wanted to be angry and confront him. RAISE hell and scream. But, when Jason woke up, I just gave him the biggest smile while holding back tears "Hey. Good Morning Jason :) How are you feeling :) :) :)".

He just responds with "Yah. Cool." and laid back down. After another hour, he finally wakes up. Stares deeply at me for like 10 seconds and says. "Common. Lets go. Quick." As if nothing happened?

I do as he says. Jason finds his sister and they both sit in the front of the car. Sam even asked me in the car about what happened to my top and why it was teared/falling apart...I just said that it ripped randomly while I was walking. Not sure why I was protecting him. Why I didn't say anything.

Jason drops me home and my mom comes outside to invite both of them for breakfast. Jason gives my mom a big hug and says sure! As I'm standing there I say "I'll make breakfast for everyone as a thank you :). Eggs okay?"

Without looking at me Jason says "Scrabbled. With peppers and cheese." So I made that for him. So Yes. Yes. Yes I made my assaulter/***ist breakfast the morning right after my r*pe. I'm just a dumb bitch. We all ate breakfast like nothing like normal. We have never addressed it despite seeing each other multiple times since and talking semi-regularly, its strange because sometimes I wonder if he even remembers that this happened?

The absolute crazy thing is, he did not have to do this to me. If he played his cards right, I 10000% would've slept with him - maybe even that night. Wouldn't have taken a lot on his end. Its just the fact that Jason didn't even fucking care to try and win me over. He literally put in zero effort and still ended up getting all of my pussy and everything he wanted so easily. Jason treated me as if I was some kind of pleasure throw away blow up doll.

...So this will be extreme...but I am actually extremely grateful that this **pe happened to me and if I could back in time I would want Jason to claim me, **pe me and use me like trash exactly as he did a million-gazillion times over.

I feel blessed to be the worthless damaged trash whore who wasn't worth the effort and was only there as a hole. The only thing I regret is not being able to remember the whole night fully. I've replayed it over and over again and I would literally give anything to be able to relive that or see a recording. Keep wishing I hugged him more, sucked him more, kissed him and let him go in me longer.

I am so thankful for Jason and respect the dude so freaking much! Getting R**ED that night was the single best thing that has happened to me in my life. This experience helped kickstart my sexual exploration and somehow be more confident. Since then I have been very open and promiscuous willing to let my imagination go wild and (safely) dabble in some intense kinks. Its so freeing and fun to enjoy life. I am very happy in my career/life/family and have had some very happy long term relationships as well and met some amazing people.

So a few weeks ago Jason called me that he is having a wedding in Mexico. I am so freaking happy for him!!!!! He has been with her for a few years now so don't think he's done anything to anyone since (hopefully). He actually is a really great and caring guy (if you ignore that one night). Jason invited me to the wedding, and even offered to pay for the ticket. No way am I accepting the ticket lol. Just excited to celebrate him and see him again. Really want to tell him how much that night meant to me but that's probably not appropriate at this point lol.

[This was my first write up so any advice or comments are appreciated. If people enjoy it I can improve and want to write more]