Miss Addiscombe's Virtue

"Ah," said my father as I strode into the drawing room at Harthorpe Manor "Stephen, this is Miss Addiscombe."

I stared, she was dressed from head to toe in black, every single thing and although she might have been regarded generally as a great beauty the evil stare with which she regaled me dismissed any such notion of beauty instantly.

"Enchanted," I smiled, "Your reputation precedes you, and your beauty is indeed, ah," I paused and cast my eyes around the high ceilinged oak panelled room seeking inspiration, "Quite remarkable."

She near un nerved me with her icy stare, her anger clear in her brown eyes

"It was justice brought me Mr Darrowby," she retorted, with the air of someone used to compliments, "Not to seek meaningless platitudes but justice, my just deserts."

"Indeed?" I enquired, "And what injustice have I brought upon you?"

"Stephen!" my father scolded, "Why Mr Collin's estates of course."

"Oh, Castlefields!" I exclaimed, "But what injustice?"

"Sit down," my father ordered, "You have taken possession of Mr Collin's estate, the very estate Miss Addiscombe had hoped would be her matrimonial home."

"Yes, indeed," I agreed, "But I see no injustice."

"You intoxicate my poor Henry and cheat him of his properties by card sharpery and see no injustice." she snarled.

I stared, a wisp of stray chestnut brown hair straggled across her pale pink forehead, nothing in itself but somehow indicative that she cared not for anything but retribution and I was fortunate that I had taken note of my father's instruction to sit or I should have fallen, "Oh, I see," I agreed.

"You do not deny it?" she asked icily.

"No, I own Castlefields, there is no denying it." I admitted.

"Stephen!" my father exclaimed, "Why that's a thousand acres!"

"Nine hundred and eighty three," I corrected him.

"Well its nigh on a thousand acres!" he declared, "No wonder poor Miss Addiscombe is so discomfitted."

"And you stole it from poor Mr Collins." Miss Addiscombe snapped.

"Hardly stole!" I replied, "No, do you see," I tried to explain.

"Well I am ruined by your chicanery," Miss Addiscombe announced, "Poor Mr Collins is destitute and I am to become governess to the Misses Grayson, do you understand." she said angrily.

"Her poor papa has but recently departed this earth and his estates are entailed upon his Cousin Geoffrey, his uncle Robert's issue do you see," Mama interjected.

"Oh, my sincere condolences." I commiserated.

Mama continued "He has ordered poor Miss Addiscombe and her poor mama to the from the house and Miss Addiscombe must find a position since poor Mr Collins is now ruined and has withdrawn his offer of marriage!"

My mind clicked relentlessly, Miss Addisombe, only daughter of Hubert Addiscombe, clearly Collins once thought her an heiress, and worthy of wooing despite her foul demeanour, and had then cast her aside thoughtlessly.

"Oh!" I was about to protest but the anger in Miss Addiscombe was so fierce that I remained silent.

"And Mr Collins?" I enquired, trying to reconcile the saint I saw in Miss Addiscombe's mind with the cheating idle whore chaser I had lately had business dealings with.

"Desperate to regain his fortune." Miss Addiscombe averred, "As you well know."

"Shall you join us for Dinner?" my mother asked brightly.

"No, I thank you," Miss Addiscombe demurred, and she shuffled awkwardly in her chair.

"Miss Addiscombe wished to meet you Stephen, to put a face to the name," my father explained.

"Ah," I agreed, "Then if you will excuse me I have business to attend." I bowed to Miss Addiscombe and made my way to my room, which I retained from my childhood despite the fine town house I owned outright in Hepple Street and I set about my affairs.

The business of Collins perplexed me, it was true that I had acquired his estates, but through trade, Buntingthorpe had made Collins a proposition, Collins needed collateral and I offered a term loan of barely a fraction of the value of the property at a healthy interest which Collins accepted.

It was hardly my fault that the Manchester and Carlisle railway shares which Collins mortgaged himself to acquire and which were expected to increase prodigiously in value should have instead plunged to worthlessness, maybe I should have given Collins more time but business is business, and my own collateral is not limitless, though I had done splendidly from various of my investments, and my fathers five hundred pound loan offered when I came down from Cambridge to show I had no head for business had now be repaid and my worth grown greatly.

"Has Miss Addiscome gone?" I asked when I came down again.

"Such a sweet child." my mother said.

"She walked Stephen," Father said, "Walked from the Grayson's to meet us and shall walk back again."

"What?" I asked, "To see me?"

"Indeed," my father confirmed.

"Should have offered her the carriage." I suggested.

"She's Grayson's servant now Stephen." mother reminded me, "Propriety forbids."

"Tosh!" I snapped, and I bellowed, "Hodgkinson, my carriage if you please!"

"Sir?" Hodgkinson enquired as he emerged from the servants sitting room.

"My carriage, I shall return to town this evening." I informed him.

"Very good sir," he said as was his wont and he scuttled away to the carriage shed and the stables.

I collected my traps and he had the carriage at the door before I was ready and so I was able to swing aboard and set off with no delay.

I made a detour and I came across Miss Addiscombe near the barn at Fotherby farm, "Might I offer a ride?" I asked.

"No!" she said rudely "You may not!"

This was a shock indeed, night was falling, the evening train could be heard snorting along the railway, and at this rate she would not be home with the Graysons before darkness fell, more worryingly I would not be home or in town when night fell.

"Then if you shall not accept my hospitality I shall have to insist," I ordered, "Climb aboard I say;" but she defied me and when I climbed down she ran, which while unexpected did at least speed her journey.

"Walk on!" I ordered and as she ran so I followed and when she slowed I climbed down and spurred her on and just when she seemed exhausted so the Graysons' establishment hove into view and with her last reserves of energy she rushed to their sanctuary, and, seeing she was safe, I made my way to my house in Hepple Street.

My housekeeper Mrs Frape awaited me, "Oh sir, why we never expected," she blustered.

"Yes?" I asked, "So what have you to confess?"

"I have no dinner for you sir!" she admitted.

"And Sefton, where is Sefton?" I asked, Sefton my osler, a fine figure of a man.

"He is at the Flying Horse, sir." she said

"Then I shall stable the horses," I agreed, "While you prepare a repast."

"But Sir, I have no meat, nothing." she complained.

"Then I shall dine at the Colonial and Americas Club." I said and having stabled my own horses and changed into a suit suitable for the purpose I made my way there straightway.

There was a surly bunch present, Henry Collins among them, boasting of his latest venture, and his new love, "Lord Arkett's daughter Tiffany," he boasted, and proposed a toast to the ageing, tolerably ugly and undoubtedly fat noble woman.

"And what of Miss Addiscombe?" I asked.

"More interested in my house than me, old boy," he averred, "Scheming little trollop."

"What if she should sue for breach of promise?" I asked.

"She ended it." Mr Collins retorted, "Not I."

I dined at near eleven o'clock,and when I was finished "A room if you please," I requested.

"Indeed sir!" Thrumpsford the under manager agreed, "And a maid?"

"No!" I declared, "Certainly not!"

"A boy perhaps?" he leered.

"No, most certainly not!" I protested, "Do you take me for a sodomite?"

"I intended no offence Mr Darrowby," he squirmed, "Mr Collins suggested," he lapsed to silence as I considered a swift blow to his jaw,

"Then never suggest such a thing again." I insisted, but then my anger turned to more affluent targets but I had to reflect that at the age of twenty five summers I had yet to find time for matrimony, and as a passing knowledge of sea-mans diseases kept me far from brothels and courtesans, so one might logically infer that I took my pleasure from sodomy.

He found me a room and I slept fitfully a sodomite indeed, well I should show Mr Collins I decided, but how was a different problem indeed.

I breakfasted at the club, "Darrowby, old chap, might I borrow your coach do you think?" Mr Collins asked jovially and insolently as we ate our toast.

"No, for it is a sporting number and would surely break under your weight," I suggested and he looked so shocked that I relented immediately.

"Keep it for the week," I offered, "For I have business in Brighton." Business indeed, and for that the railway not the cart was required.

The train ride was tedious in the extreme, why oh why must locomotive engines pootle along southwards at no more than thirty miles in the hour when Mr Gooch's locomotive engines hurtle eastward and westward to and from Bristol at twice that velocity?

But for all that I struggled across London from Euston Gate to Blackfriars and behind a yellow hued Locomotive Engine of the Brighton line I made my way slowly south.

I had business, business indeed, a row of houses, hovels, worthless hovels beside the line near the Brighton station, and needed for expansion of the same if not immediately then in the fullness of time and I brokered the sale from a variety of owners to the railway company for a not immodest fee, and whilst there I sampled the season beside the sea as society enjoyed the season of dancing and bathing.

I saw the society beauties and the courtesans and worse the myriad whores that abounded but none caught my eye, and when the ink was dry and the promissory note safe in my valise I made my tedious way north once more.

I spent no more than one night at my home before I decided to inspect Mr Collins former estate Castlefields for myself, perhaps I should sell, perhaps retain it for my home, but first I must inspect it.

I took the train to Ousterby the nearest station to Castlefields, slowly and tediously behind a museum piece of a locomotive engine that should have restricted itself to hauling coal waggons, and on arrival at Castlefields I was unwelcome, news of my acquisition having failed to penetrate to these distant parts..

"The Mistress is away," I was informed,

"I am Master now!" I insisted.

"Well sir it is from Mr Collins and his bride to be Miss Addiscombe that I take my orders," the cook said, a great fat battleaxe of a crone, indeed precisely the sort of crone with whom one should give the most careful consideration before seeking battle.

"Then I shall bring papers and the bailiff," I declared.

"I would be obliged sir," she said and then added, "But come and see the terrace, oh and the view my Lord," the cook suggested as a way to mollify me, and I stood on the terrace and saw the view, "Ruined by the railway I am afraid," she said, but I disagreed.

"Framed by the railway," I said "Scarcely ruined," as old "Hebron" the last survivor of the Tallot class of locomotive engine smokily trundled south with a short train of waggons, making my assertion ridiculous.

"Miss Addiscombe has done wonders sir!" the cook avowed, "See her choices of colour and of furnishings." she ordered more than invited before taking me on an entire circumnavigation of the house.

It was very ordinary, I fear, and I left to catch the next train, however something possessed me to take instead the train away from town arriving instead at the station nearby to Mr Grayson's house or if not adjacent then a mere four miles away.

I walked across the moor easily enough, I had ridden the whole area with hunting and swiftly came to the Grayson house.

Children were playing noisily and there was no one to be seen, "Hello!" I called.

"Yes," a sweet female voice called, an voice which turned to ice when it's owner regaled me, "Oh Mr Darrowby." Miss Addiscombe addressed me, she wore an apron and hat less her brown hair swept into a tight bun she seemed hot and sweaty, and begrimed, no longer a haughty lady but a servant.

"The children are unattended?" I queried.

"I have to cook their meal, Mr Collins has taken Mrs Collins to town." she said as she fidgeted.

A haughty servant I realised, "And the cook?" I asked and her answer said all, she was no governess, she was cook / housekeeper, and not the first to have been so easily tricked into the purgatory of servitude.

"She is visiting her family," she lied.

"Liar," I said, "Tis a terrible shame Collins and you were not wed as you have this common disdain for the truth that would make, you union entirely perfect in every way." I didn't see the pan she was holding until it flashed and struck the side of my face.

"Argggh!" I cried, "You witch!" and I lunged at her and grasped her slender waist, she struggled but I subdued her until I was able to bend her over and raise her skirt to expose her buttocks, and as still thinking herself a lady she had petticoats where as servant would wear a simple skirt and pantaloons so when I bared her buttocks they were indeed bared, and more, her sweet conch and her tight round bottom both displayed.

The sight unnerved me, I felt inappropriate stirrings in my loins so I slapped her buttocks more as a token than in anger, yet she wailed as if I had whipped her soundly, and continued to wail as I unhanded her, set her down and stood back and even then she glared at me with tears running down her cheeks.

"I hate you, Mr Darrowby!" she snapped not unreasonably.

"Ah clearly, clearly," I agreed, "But why?"

"You stole Mr Collins estate and my happiness on the turn of a card." she charged again and the duplicity of Collins was revealed once more.

"Then the post of Housekeeper at Mr Collins house does not appeal?" I asked, after all I wanted his lands, I had already plans for a great junction of railways on his lands, he could have the house for all I cared.

"If it means being behoven to you then no!" she said, "Good day!"

I felt sorry for her suddenly, her hair looked uncared for and dirty where before it shone, and her fingernails were dirtied and cut short already and her dress and apron looked in need of a wash.

I decided to leave her to her drudgery yet a sense of injustice prevailed as I walked across the hills the six or so miles to my father's house where I arrived in good time for dinner.

I stayed overnight and borrowed a nag next morning to post to town where I sought out Mr Collins and there I had a brainstorm, "Collins." I said, "I would be obliged if you would inform Miss Addiscombe of the manner of the transaction whereby I acquired your property."

"Oh, developing a conscience are you?" he asked.

"Perhaps, but I would be obliged." I suggested.

"And what do I derive from this," he asked "Your carriage perhaps?" he asked, "As a token."

"Are you so desperate as that?" I asked, but I saw he was, "Desperate for a stake for a card school?" I asked. He nodded.

"Bad luck cannot continue indefinitely." he averred.

"Then we shall visit Mr Grayson," I insisted, "So you may set her straight on the matter."

"Hold hard Darrowby!" Collins demurred, "What benefit is there in it for me?"

"Mr Grayson enjoys a game of cards," I observed, "Twenty guineas, shall that be a sufficient stake with which to bribe you?"

"Indeed," Collins said his piggy little eyes bulging, "Perhaps Bulgersby and Farnsworth might join us?"

"In that case we shall invite Grayson and Miss Addiscombe here instead." I suggested.

"What, the club?" Collins asked, and I affirmed this was indeed my intention.

I had this notion to wager the Castlefields house against the twenty and then lose so Henry might still ask for Miss Addiscombe's hand, though why I felt this way I could not fathom.

It was not so straight forward, with Miss Addiscombe being constrained to servitude but her seeming standing as governess prevailed and on the Saturday as arranged Mr and Mrs Grayson and Miss Addiscombe joined me for Luncheon at the club, believing it to be at Mr Collins' invitation together with Thompson, Tommy, my older brother, father's heir, and of course Collins.

From somewhere Miss Addiscombe had brought out a gown in some hideous blue green colouring, which she wore with the air of a Duchess, an illusion heightened by the wearing of a white blouse beneath buttoned to her chin.

"Henry!" Miss Addiscombe simpered when she saw him, "Have you sent for me?"

"He wishes to see you yes," I said for him and we dined, dined very well at considerable expense, as I found when I paid my monthly account, and then having dined Mr Collins invited us to join him and we settled down to a game of chance, and skill, poker in fact.

Bulgersby, Farnsworth and Ensterby, friends and business partners of Collins's and mine also joined us while knowing I was paying Collins ordered only the finest wines

Henry Collins should have drunk only water, as it was lost twenty guineas in as many minutes, he had the card playing talents of a hedge-hog, I lent him another twenty but that soon frittered itself away as well.

"So Henry, how goes your railway investment?" I asked.

"Well, very well." he agreed.

"And Castlefields?" I asked, "Shall you yet repay me?"

"No, you won it fair and square," he lied.

"So win it back," I suggested, an idea forming in y mind, after all I only wanted the lands of Castlefields, not the house, "What will you wager against Castlefields?" I asked.

"Ugh?" he said drunkenly, "Miss Addiscombe."

"What?" I asked.

"Miss Addiscombe's virtue!" he said.

"What?" Miss Addiscombe asked in consternation, "My virtue, that is not yours to wager!"

"Oh Mary, how exciting!" Mrs Grayson exclaimed drunkenly, "Oh think of it, that great house!"

"Then will you wager it, Miss Addiscombe," I asked, "For Castlefields?"

She stared at Mr Collins uncertainly, shocked.

"For the house, not the estate, house and contents, is that clear?" I asked.

She paused for a considerable time and then, "Yes!" she said with a finality we all took for agreement.

We were dealt two cards each, Miss Addiscombe and I, I had ace and king of spades, then five more cards were dealt and turned face up upon the table, another ace, a king and three smaller cards.

I had resolved to fold do you see, to make her a gift of Castlefields to assuage my guilt but, before I could do so Miss Addiscombe declared, "No!" and she threw down her cards and whirled around and raged at Mr Collins, "A two and a three, you complete fool!" she stared at me, "And you?"

I showed the cards awkwardly.

"Shall you take my virtue here and now," she challenged.

"Indeed, not!" I retorted, but suddenly the way I might disabuse my friends of the notion I was sodomite was laid before me, after all she had wagered her virtue willingly enough.

"Better have it done then you may resume your duties." Ensterby suggested.

"Oh Miss Addiscombe!" Mrs Grayson cried.

"Leave us Muriel!" her husband ordered, "This is man's business," and as Mrs Grayson left us for the ladies sitting room he suggested "Miss Addiscombe, may I suggest the chaise longue in the withdrawing room."

"What!" she wailed, "Have you no compassion!" but we rose and made our way to the Gentlemans withdrawing room.

"No indeed," Farnsworth interjected, as we walked, "You wagered and lost, the sooner virtue is seen to be taken my dear, the sooner you may resume your duties."

"Oh yes indeed," Mr Grayson agreed, "I have great need of a governess who partakes of fleshy pleasures!"

"She is your skivvy man don't be so heartless!" Ensterby chided but Grayson was adamant.