Letters From Captivity
Day 1
Darling,
I remember the pained look on your face when I told you I was selected. That image still haunts my daydreams and I want you to know that I will be okay. I'm only thinking of us and how we will get through this together. When I was being shackled and herded onto the bus, we met eyes for the last time, and we must acknowledge that we knew then and there that we don't need to be physically close to remain bonded in soul and spirit as a couple as we have been for years. After all, my sentencing wasn't very long. I'll be out in no time! I promise to keep you updated on life from the inside and send letters as often as I'm able.
Oh honey, my first day was frightening and confusing! The bus ride seemed excruciatingly long but the sun remained high in the sky despite our late departure. Me and the other women were herded off the bus and into a gigantic brick building by scary looking men in uniforms. And I really had to pee, I wasn't sure how much longer I could hold it. One by one, they patted us down and searched our belongings. What they could possibly be looking for on God's green earth is beyond me. That was perhaps the scariest moment of my life! When it was my turn, I was separated from the other women and trapped in this barren room with only one way in and one way out and nothing but a table to furnish it. Three men in uniforms were in there to search through our stuff, three! I don't understand why so many able bodies would need to be present for that kind of thing, but who am I to question the system?
I suppose I should be grateful that they had even let us take our purses on the bus with us, but they didn't have to empty them! It was so humiliating, they just dumped out everything from my purse onto the table and rifled through it, inspecting each individual thing like it was potentially deadly or something. One of the guards even held me tight as the other two made rough with my things. He had me in some sort of tight bear hug or something. Maybe it was a special technique they're taught because there was no way I was getting out of it! He was so strong I could hardly breathe! I felt his breath in my hair and on the back of my neck and down my blouse and I got goosebumps. He was leaning back and had his hips thrust forward, as if he was going to crack my back like a chiropractor or something. In fact, I wasn't really standing as I watched the other two sift through my belongings, only the toes of my shoes were touching the ground. It made me regret wearing my usual yoga pants (yes, I know they're too thin, and yes, I will buy replacements) since I could feel, um, well, his
manhood
on my bottom and although I didn't point it out so as not to embarrass him, it did make me feel, well, naked? A peculiar feeling it was, but I don't know how else to describe it.
Anyway, I wanted to let him know that it wasn't necessary to hold me like that and that I would definitely be civil. After all, they were just doing their jobs, but he was squeezing me so tight I could hardly get a word out. Not to mention the unfortunate position of his arms, they were crushing my breasts! They still ache as I'm writing this, but I'm sure he didn't purposefully crush me. So, there I was, being hugged by a big man so hard that I was lifted off the ground, watching two other big men taking each of my smalls and inspecting them fully, as if they could be possibly dangerous! I'm sure it would have made a funny sight had anyone else seen it. Once this is all over, we can tell Katie and Leigha and have a good laugh about what a funny sight we made. I'm getting the giggles just thinking about it.
As they were inspecting my stuff, I could swear, may He forgive me, that one of those guards took my lipstick! I'm almost positive I saw him slip it into his pocket after he took off the cap and inspected it. And, oh babe, they laughed at my spare unmentionables! You know I keep a pair of panties in my purse in case of emergencies, and I had my white cotton panties with me this time, one of my favorites. But those mean guards grinned at me while they unfolded them and, dare I say, sniffed them! They smelled my underwear right in front of me and laughed about it! I understand they're just doing their job, but I dub it very rude! And what if they were soiled? Did they not consider that? I suppose I'm overreacting, but I couldn't even object because of the big man squeezing me to death. I could even hear
him
chuckle behind me, with his deep guttural voice. I was so humiliated!
Anyway, they fully went through my purse and the big man finally put me down. I had breathed a much-needed sigh of relief, albeit too soon because, oh Honey, that wasn't even the worst part! I had, of course, forgotten that their procedure dictates they must search
me
as well! They informed me that my search procedure would take place in two parts, and the second one would take place possibly in a few days in the same room. I don't know how they could get any more thorough though babe, they searched me good!
All three of them patted me down very roughly! You would think it's a one-man job, but apparently, they have strict procedure they must adhere to. They touched me all over! One big man started at my top half and continue down my body, while another one touched my tummy and my middle, and one started way down at my shoes and then went up. At least they sometimes crouched down to waist-height to make me feel less vulnerable, although it was kind of uncomfortable because their faces were so close to my private parts. It is embarrassing to admit that as I was being pulled and pushed and twisted and turned, I did sometimes accidentally bump into one of their faces, especially with my butt. Well, they should have known! After all, my butt is fairly big, and they were being so rough with me! Thankfully, they didn't get mad, in fact they didn't seem to mind at all.
Oh Hubby, I'm so sorry, I tried to stop them, but I couldn't vocalize my thoughts, and I was being twisted and turned and I just didn't know what to do -- well, I'm rambling, but prepare yourself for this; they touched my