Joe and Natalie were new neighbours of mine. They were a young couple and only recently married from what I could gather. I thought that they were rather an odd couple as she was young and vivacious and while he was just as young he was a grump. Nothing seemed to satisfy him. I could hear them arguing quite often, usually with him finding fault with something she'd done. Still, she certainly knew how to stand up to him, giving back as good as she got.
One week I noticed that the amount of arguing had taken a sudden decrease. By a decrease I mean that there weren't any arguments at all. I also noticed that while Natalie was out and about I didn't see Joe at all. I idly wondered if she'd done him in and buried him in the back yard. I mentioned his absence in passing and Natalie informed me that he was interstate and would be back in a few days.
Then our beloved Governor called for a Covid lockdown, insisting that everyone stay at home and anyone coming in from interstate would have to go into a compulsory two week quarantine at a nominated quarantine hotel. It didn't really impact me so I tended to treat the whole thing with ignore. It occurred to me that possible it did impact Natalie and as I was going to run down to the shops I thought I'd drop by and see how she was getting on and if she'd like me to pick some things up for her.
"Thanks, Alex," she said. "Come on in and I'll give you a list and some money."
I followed her to the kitchen, admiring the way her bottom moved underneath her pants. Tights or yoga leggings or whatever they were, they clung to her curves in a most loving fashion, displaying those curves to their best advantage. Being a dirty old man I was quite prepared to follow along and admire.
"You seem a bit out of sorts," I observed. It was easy to spot. She was opening and closing drawers and cupboards quite forcefully, and I thought she'd tear the paper she was writing on she was being so heavy handed.
"Frigging Joe," she snapped. "I warned him that they were talking about another lockdown but did he listen? Not so that you would notice. He had to delay returning just one more day and now he's stuck in a stupid quarantine for two weeks and I'm stuck here alone for those two weeks. He's an inconsiderate ass."
"I see. Missing out on a little loving company, are we?"
"Ha! One week away on business is one thing. Now it's another two weeks without him and it's just not fair. Women need company, too, you know."
"I guess you do. It wouldn't be right to invite an ex-boyfriend to visit, would it?"
Natalie looked slightly scandalised.
"I couldn't do that. I'd feel horrible guilty. It would be just plain wrong."
"Yeah, I guess it would. The only other option would be -- ah, no, that wouldn't work."
"What? What wouldn't work?"
"I was just thinking that if you met a considerate rapist that would solve your problems."
"What? Get raped? How is that any sort of a solution?"
"I said a considerate rapist," I pointed out. "Because it's rape you would have no need to feel guilty. It's not your fault it happens so you wouldn't even need to tell Joe. The rapist wouldn't dare admit what he'd done. A win for you without any guilt."
"That's insane. Besides a rapist would probably beat me when I tried to fight him off. Then I'd have bruises and I'd have to confess what happened."
"Dear me. Haven't you heard those police lectures to women about keeping yourself from harm? They recommend non-resistance. That means that if the rapist is truly considerate of your feelings he probably wouldn't even damage your clothes. Just strip you carefully and have his wicked way with you, leaving you unhurt but, hopefully, satisfied."
"That's ridiculous. You almost make getting raped sound attractive. Not that it makes any difference. I don't know any rapists, considerate or otherwise."
"That is a catch," I admitted. I considered the matter for a few moments.