I Own You Now, Sissy
When I saw his ad online, I was instantly intrigued by the headline. It read: "DOM MASTER SEEKING SISSY SUB FOR TRAINING." There was a pic attached of a headless man dressed in black leather holding a pair of steel handcuffs in one hand and his massive cock in the other. Now, I was used to seeing ads like this, and most of them were either dreamers or scammers; married guys who liked to dress up while their wives were away and masturbate while chatting with other guys on the internet, or scam-artists claiming to belong to huge international conglomerates of Dominants who will invite you into the fold for a few hundred dollars. Having been in the scene for over a decade I'd learned to spot them from miles away, and often blocked their profiles without conversation. But this one seemed different.
"EXPERIENCED DOMINANT ALPHA-MALE SEEKING SISSY FOR SEXUAL OWNERSHIP, TRAINING, AND RAW FUCKING. NEWBIES NEED NOT APPLY!!! PM ME WITH A LIST OF YOUR HARD LIMITS AS WELL AS PICS OF YOURSELF DRESSED FEMININE, WILL ONLY RESPOND TO THOSE WHO ARE EXCEPTIONAL."
I hardly saw myself as exceptional (I was too tall and broad shouldered to be passable), certainly not as hot as some of the MTF folk coming up in the scene who were half my age, skinny, and had long natural hair. I responded to his ad anyways, and was surprised that he responded within an hour. We agreed to move the conversation to a private chat room where he instantly dove into my experience and preferences.
"How long have you been sucking cock?"
I blushed at the question, the abruptness of it. "I dunno, 20 years or so?"
"Have you always done it dressed as a sissy?"
"No. That part is fairly recent, though I've been secretly wearing panties for as long as I can remember."
"I figured as much," he wrote. "That's always the story with sissy faggots like you."
My hands left the keyboard and I sat back on my sofa, reading and re-reading the words on the screen. Sissy... faggots...
After a moment, he acknowledged the potential insult; "Have I offended you?"
"A little," I admitted.
"Oh no, don't misunderstand me, I don't mean EITHER of those words as an insult. I think our generation was brought up to see anything less than totally masculine as a weakness of some kind. Little boys on the playground will call other boys sissy to hurt their feelings, just as teens will use the word faggot to insult each other or even to entice someone to fight them physically, as a test of their manhood and their place in the social hierarchy. Same goes for the word "bitch" inside the prison community. In the movies prison sex is rarely consensual, and the person getting fucked isn't valued, but that's not the case at all. In fact, bitches in prison are HIGHLY valued and protected by the inmates. Makes sense when you think about it, if you're facing a life term in prison and you're never going to be with another woman then you'd better get used to having a man suck your dick or else it won't be getting sucked period. Bitch, sissy, faggot, slut, cunt... these are all words I use to address my submissives, should you become one of them."
His explanation made sense, and my reaction to those words wasn't his fault; it was how society had raised me to react. In the grand scheme of things they described me quite accurately, so I made a mental note to disregard their connotations outside the context of communication between a Dom and a sub.
"Thanks for clarifying," I wrote. "I can live with that."
"Good. So... my potential cocksucking-sissy-faggot-bitch, you like to wear women's panties, why is that? What is it about them?"
I had already begun to type when another message from him stopped me. It said: "Don't say you don't know. That's not acceptable."
I deleted what he knew I had written and thought about it for a moment before responding. "Whenever I put them on, I feel sexy. Sexy and at the same time I feel vulnerable."
"Good answer. I know exactly what you're talking about. Do you know why so many attractive females like to wear skimpy bikinis at the beach?"
"I don't know, to get a good tan?"
"That's just window-dressing. Think about it. Name another place other than a strip-club where it's entirely acceptable for a woman to parade around in what amounts to nothing more than a bra and panties. An attractive woman knows that men are looking at them all the time, and most of the time they're imagining fucking them and imagining them naked. As a society, we've decided that it's acceptable for women to wear next to nothing as long as they're standing on sand, and it's acceptable for men to LOOK at them doing it. Whenever a sissy like you puts on a pair of sexy panties, you get a little taste of what that attractive woman on the beach gets to experience every single day. You get to see yourself as desirable."
I was staggered by his insight, and told him so. "I've never heard anyone say it like that before, but YES! That's exactly how it feels."
"You want men to see how sexy you are and desire you, that's why you dress up and post naughty pictures to strangers on the internet. You like that men want to fuck you, don't you?"
"Yes, I do."
"But I'm guessing that most of the men you've been with aren't gay and probably aren't actually bi-sexual, they're just middle-aged guys living in sexless marriages who aren't attractive enough, rich or charming enough, to get an actual woman at least as attractive as you are who will suck their cock or maybe even fuck on the first date..."
He wasn't wrong.
"... so they pretend you're something other than a guy dressed as a female-hooker, and they get to have an orgasm. And you get to pretend you're a female, albeit something of a promiscuous slut, and you can get some dick in you. Both parties are happy, and nobody loses an eye or a finger, right?"
Again, I couldn't argue. "Right."
"See, that's not what I am, not even close."
I found myself leaning towards the screen of my laptop, twitching in anticipation as a little circle spun in the chat box indicating that he was writing, and writing, and writing some more. When his message finally appeared, it took up a full page.
"Let me tell you a little about me. First, in case you're wondering, I'm 6'5", 220 lbs, and I have a 9" cock that stays hard for hours. I can cum up to 5 times in a single session with a sissy, which usually ranges from 8-12 hours..."
My guts twisted at the thought of it: 12 hours. I'd never been with a man for longer than 6 and we were asleep for at least half of it.
"... Only two things will stop play between us. One, if you pass out. Two, if you say our agreed upon safeword. Outside of that I'll be increasing and decreasing the levels of intensity based on both your verbal and non-verbal cues. This will NOT be a matter of you just laying there while I fuck your mouth and ass, I will be playing you like an instrument. Every thrust, every slap on the ass, every word spoken will be like a note in my symphony. I want you to tell me your hard limits, now. Those will be the only notes I'm not allowed to play, and I'll have to adjust the music accordingly so I need to see if I can work with what your instrument can provide. That said, if I CAN work within those restrictions, I can promise the following things.
You WILL feel sexy and vulnerable. You will also feel used, degraded, humiliated and loved, all in the same session.
You WILL be safe and protected against all harm while under my control and care. You can stop the session at ANY TIME with a safeword, and what happens stays between us.
I WILL leave you feeling as though you've been fucked by a freight-train, your belly full of cum and your ass sore for at least a few days.
That's what I bring to the table. So, let's have those hard limits and see if I can hear the tune."