I'm a good poker player! I have certainly won more than my share. I usually walk away from the table counting my cash. But this night the cards had not gone my way. I was down over $1000 and was flat busted when the game broke up. Three of the guys left, and only my buddy George and his son Larry were left. Larry was home from college, and we had agreed to let him sit in on our game.
I have to admit that it did not add to my concentration that Larry bragged all night about his conquests in the sexual arena. Like any cocky twenty year old, he thought that he was a gift to women. He really was a good looking guy, blond and buffed, so he had some reason to think so. To hear him tell it the babes couldn't wait to get naked with him. He had many stories to tell, but it seemed his favorite number was a girl he called Liz. I am trying to figure out whether to hold an ace kicker or not, and Larry disturbs me by telling how good her tits taste. When I am contemplating whether or not he is bluffing, he is talking about the great blow jobs she gives. I hold my breath and draw to an inside straight while he talks about the pink pussy she has. How is a guy to concentrate with a smart ass college kid talking like that all night? No wonder I am down a grand.
So George has to rub it in a bit. "Wow, Mark, how much did you drop tonight? Must have been $1500?"
"No, no," I said. "I am only down a little bit. I will make it up next game."
"Next game is a whole week," George goaded. "What are you going to do for fun money until then?"
"Hey, pal, don't worry about me. I will get by," I tossed back. But in fact that was exactly what I had been thinking. I need my daily dose of gambling adrenalin. Without cash for the week, no lottery tickets, no calls to my bookie, no slot action at the Elks Club. I was going to have to tough it out and I didn't like the idea.
"Hey, I hate to see a friend in a fix. Maybe we can give you a chance to win some of it back," offered George. I knew that between him and his son they had a good chunk of my cash in their pockets.
"Sorry, buddy, I am broke. I don't even have a nickel to match coins with you," I bemoaned.
"Well, isn't your daughter in the other room? Call her in here," he said.
Betty, my eighteen year old daughter, was home from college too. She had come in during the game, and had even brought us some chips and dip from the kitchen. I knew she was a looker, and had noticed that Larry could hardly take his eyes off her in her tight sweater and mini skirt. I wondered what George thought she could do. She was certainly no poker player.
"Go ahead," he urged.
So I called Betty in. Once again as soon as she entered the room, I saw Larry eying her. She sort of dimpled at the attention and flashed him a big smile. I guess she didn't mind a good looking guy ogling her.
Then George started in. "Betty," he said, "you love your old man, don't you?"
Betty put a hand on my shoulder and said, "Of course, I do."
George said, "Well, I am afraid he lost a lot of money tonight. Now you owe your Dad a lot of loyalty, not to mention all the expense he has keeping you in clothes and makeup. Wouldn't you like to help him out?"
"Sure," said my daughter. "But I don't know how I could."
"Well, I do," said George. "Mark, I will bet you $100 on one hand of poker. That would give you a stake to start up with again."
Now I knew if I could just get that $100, I could sucker George and Larry into more bets and run it back up to what I lost and then some. I was sure that the cards were about to turn my way and knew I couldn't lose this time. But I had to say, "But George, you know I am busted. I don't have anything to put up."
George smirked and took a $100 bill out of his stack. He said, "Your daughter is standing right beside you. How about this. I will bet $100 on one hand. If you win then you get your chance to run it back up. Every gambler knows how that can work. But β if you lose..."
"I'm not going to lose!" I declared with certainty.
"IF you lose," George said, "then Larry gets to take Betty's sweater off."
"WHAT?" gasped my daughter.
I was thinking it over. I saw the look in Larry's eyes, and I looked at my daughter and saw the look in her eyes. But I also saw that C-note lying on the table and knew I had to have it. One good hand, that was all I needed.
I looked at Betty and said, "Honey, you know I won't lose this hand. Just ride with me here and be my Lady Luck. It will be all right, I promise."
Betty swallowed hard. She looked over at Larry staring at her, and looked at the $100 bill. "Just take it off," she said. "No touching, right?"
"No touching," said George. "What about it, gambling man?" He flicked the $100 bill with a finger.
I couldn't stand it. "OK," I said, "you're on. But give up your hopes, Larry my boy, because I am not going to lose!"
"OK," said my buddy George, "one hand of 5-card stud. My $100 against your daughter's sweater." He flicked out two cards face down. I peeked at mine and saw the King of Hearts. I knew my luck was back.