Just Another Day in Paradise
I should have known the whole thing was a set-up from the start. If a thing seems too good to be true it probably is. My friend Debs and I were bumming around the Caribbean for a couple of months. She had just divorced and felt the need to celebrate and I had some long-overdue leave coming. I had also recently disentangled myself from a long-term relationship that was going nowhere fast, so we decided to relive our mad gap-year when we took a road-trip across Australia and for a blissful time forgot we had off-buttons.
There was only one big difference - this time we were thirty-two years old, not eighteen, going on nineteen.
One thing was certain - we were still getting laid, getting stoned and generally just having the time of our lives. Since that gap year, I'd occasionally taped over the off-button but this was the first time in years I had totally disabled it and it felt utterly wonderful. We were on our sixth island when Debs decided it was time to go home.
I wasn't ready yet and stayed.
It was the third week when it all went wrong. Or should that be when it all went right? At the time it seemed like the former, but eventually I came to realise it may well be the latter. Until then I had been a regular down at the little rum shacks near the harbour and had made a couple of acquaintances that meant I was very nicely taken care of in the naughty department. When I managed to persuade them both to have me at the same time, it was a very fine evening indeed. I would certainly miss Antonio and Wesley when I went home.
The night it happened, I was all by myself sipping a rum fizz hoping that one or both would turn up. I had the means to get high in my shoulder bag and looked forward to a pleasant evening. I gazed out at the moonlight on the still water, the sun now long gone. A gentle clink of rigging from the smaller boats in the harbour drifted up the hill and the mast of a beautiful luxury yacht moored a hundred or so yards away stood out. I was just beginning to think that my evening would involve a solo flight when I heard a voice from behind me. It was definitely English and had a distinct London edge to the accent.
"Hiya, all by yourself, then?"
I turned to see a younger girl staring at me. She wore a red bandana from which short dreadlocks protruded at all angles. A bit of a boob-tube took care of her modesty and striped blue and white pirate-style trousers and espadrilles completed a rag-tag outfit. There were various tattoos and piercings and her face was split into a huge, warm grin. It was obvious from her pale grey eyes she had indulged in the fine local plant life.
I nodded at her. "Yeah, looks like it for the moment."
"Join ya?" She didn't give me a chance to respond and popped herself up on a stool next to mine. She nodded at the view. "Hard to get sick o' that, eh?" She had a wide, expressive face dotted with freckles.
I agreed with her and we fell into an amiable conversation. It was nice to have some company even if it was just small talk. After a few minutes, the waitress Shak came over, a pretty local lass I had struck up a good relationship with.
"Hey Jade, irie?" She looked at the other girl. "Hey, Boo - long time, huh? Been at sea, me suppose?"
The girl nodded. "Yeah, just got back. Fuckin' 'ard work as usual but we'll make up fer it tonight!" She nodded at my drink. "Refill?"
I was in no mood to disagree and Shak went to get our order as the girl pulled a joint from her bag. It was a small island and no-one seemed too worried about it. She took a hit and handed it to me. I felt a nice tingle and thanked her. Shak returned with our drinks and got a little bonus toot as a tip.
As she left, the girl looked at me. "Jade, eh? I'm Boo." She held her slim hand out to me and I shook it.
"Hi Boo. So what's that short for?"
She shrugged and blew out a cloud of smoke before handing the joint back to me. "Anyfink you want! Hated me real name - which you ain't gonna get to know - so I shortened it. Damned sight easier, but people still can't spell it!"
The weed was working and we both got the giggles. We chatted about nothing in particular for ten, maybe fifteen minutes until she looked at her watch. "Shit, time I was offski. Look, the reason I came over in the first place, Jade - like I said to Shak, we've been crewin' that yacht down there for a rich local couple for the last month or so. We just got back and they're off island."
She sucked the last from the joint and smiled. "Cat's away - the mice have worked their bollocks off. Party time!" She chugged back the last of her drink and pointed to the mast I had seen earlier. "It's a beaut of a boat and we make sure we 'ave a right old send-off. You seem at a loose end so I thought I'd extend a little invite. It'll be fun, I promise. Hopefully see ya later - tell 'em Boo sent ya!"
I made to respond, but she was gone. I was aware of Shak hovering behind me and ordered another drink. A couple of minutes later, she put it down in front of me. "So, goin' down the Arcadia then?"
I looked at her, puzzled. "The Arcadia?"
She nodded to the harbour and her voice was wistful. "Dat lovely boat. Tings they say go on dere! Been anglin' for an invite for ages. Boo says not till I eighteen." She pouted. "Not for another t'ree month. You goin', yeah?"
I shook my head. "Don't think so Shak."
She put her hands on her hips and her voice was incredulous. "You wha'?" She jabbed a finger at me. "See, English lady - me thought you was cool, but no - turns out you fuckin' mad!"
She turned on her heel and walked away, sashaying like a catwalk model. She suddenly stopped and turned back to me. "Me no serve you no more. Drink up and get down to that boat, hear me?" She flapped her hands at me in a dismissive motion. "Go... shoo!"
I began to giggle at her antics and when I didn't move, she ran back to my table and picked up my untouched drink. "Sorry madam, we close. Been drug bust or sumfin'. Me thinks you likely carryin', so best clear out; best make it somewhere offshore to be safe." She pointed again. "Like that big fuckin' boat down dere."
Laughing, I grabbed the drink back from her. "Ok, Shakira - you win." I gulped it down and gave her a ten-dollar tip. "I'm off to 'that big fuckin' boat down there' right now!"
She fist-bumped me. "Yeah, the lady see sense! Look out for Sven - he adorable!" She turned and walked away slowly, clicking her teeth. "T'ree month. Shit, that a looooong time..."
I walked down the cliff path in a bit of a daze and skipped down the gangplank, barely able to take in the size of the yacht. It looked incredible from a distance and now I was up close it seemed to go on forever. A muscular local in a bandana, shorts and little else moved from the shadows and held up a hand. "Hey lady, you got invite?"
"Erm, yeah. Boo said to say she sent me."
I heard a throaty chuckle from the half-light. "Dey all say Boo sent dem, lady."
Feeling very foolish, I was about to turn tail and head back up the cliff path when another voice carried from the darkness. "S'ok Reuben - Jade's a mate, in't ya girl?"
The man stood back and I moved forward. Boo emerged from the shadows and held out a hand. I noticed her pirate trousers had been replaced by a sarong and it was definitely hard to miss that she was now topless. "Glad you could make it. Come on, let's get you a drink and get this party started!"