It was another visit. Another visit to Pete and Karen to talk about building their new deck. They have been really good customers, but they fall in the "high maintenance" category. You know, lots of questions, slow decision making, and frugal with their money.
Anyway, I didn't have too much going on, so rounding up work was top priority. And they knew lots of people, so I had to stay on their good side. Here I was, visiting again, revised proposal in hand for this deck that would bridge the living room to the yard. If it was going to go through, it would be a nice project and in the area where I have lots of other customers, so visibility would be a side benefit.
I rang the bell. Karen opened the door. She was in her late forties, but even so, she carries a charm that doesn't go unnoticed. She is also the frugal one, handles the money in the family and asks the hard questions. "Hi, I wanted to drop off the revised proposal for your deck," I said.
Karen waved me in and said: "Oh great, we were expecting you, come on in." I took off my shoes and walked into the house. She walked ahead of me to the living room. It was a nice open space, lots of light and even though the house was right on the main road, it was very private. "Pete had to run off and get some last minute things, so he will look at this with me later." I handed her the proposal. It was a folder with a few simple sketches, and a detailed description of the materials I would be using and how some of the railing would interface with some of the existing structure. She took the folder and opened it on the table. It was a large antique table with matching wooden chairs. It was lower than a normal dining table, but still comfortable. She pointed at a chair at the head of the table and said: "Have a seat," and I politely accepted and sat down. She sat to my right on the long side of the table, so we could see the proposal together.
We went through the proposal, page by page. Most of the stuff in the folder was already reviewed before, some small changes had been made, and some details were spelled out with more precision to make sure everybody understood what was going to be built.
Sounds came up from behind us. Somebody was walking up the stairs and opened the door. The creaking of the treads of the old house underlined the character of the house.
As she walked through the door she said: "Oh mom, did you see my yoga pants?" There stood her daughter, Laura. A cute blonde with a smile that would melt a glacier. She must have been about 22 or 23.
"Yes, they are washed, maybe still in the drier?" her mother answered. I looked while Laura turned and walked down the hall to the laundry room. She has the prettiest legs, oh, how those tights suit her, I thought to myself.
Karen shuffled the paper on the table. I caught her looking at me, a look with a thought behind it. A look that made me hastily comment on some detail we were discussing before the basement door opened.
"Found it!" Laura exclaimed from the end of the hallway. I looked at Karen, just to make sure I wasn't going to get caught flatfooted again.
Karen was getting up and while reaching out her hand, "here are the keys, make sure you drive safe." Laura smiled, another heartwarming smile and turned to the front door.
Well, I guess I was a typical male, and looked at her darting out. It wasn't much of a display, but the glimpse was well worth it. When I looked back in front of me, I saw Karen looking at me. She smiled again, and said "You really like those legs don't you?"
Crap! I thought to myself. "Was it that obvious?" "I have to admit, she is simply gorgeous, and with those tights, I am pretty sure she could cause a traffic accident by merely walking down the road." I tried to make a joke out of it, and Karen chuckled.
"Just don't get any ideas, she has a boyfriend." She said. "And word has it that he has the stamina of a Rhino."
I saw a documentary on TV about rhinoceros once; they can have sex for hours! So badly so, that some Asian countries sell ground up rhino tusk as an aphrodisiac...
"Like me" I said under my breath. This conversation is getting weird I thought to myself.
"O I heard that." Karen said while she sat back down. "I may be old, but I hear just fine." She laughed. The blood rushed to my face, I thought she was still a ways off when I said that. I moved around in my chair, uncomfortable with the situation.
Karen was smiling again, that look with a thought... She said: "Well if you are so sure you have great stamina, I want to dare you to a bet." Oh, now this conversation is really getting weird. Now, how do you answer to something like that? I thought to myself. "What do you say?" she asked smilingly.
I started stammering: "Oh, don't take this the wrong way, I find you attractive and all..."
She didn't let me finish. "No, not sex with me, Pete would never approve." She continued: "No, I will give you a hand job, and if you blow your wad in less than a minute, I win."