Deep Regret

Friday night, I got really drunk. I couldn't stand the pain that came with not being able to touch her like Lucas could. So when she came over for the night, I started on a bottle of Goldslager. I drank a little less than half of it, and I was totally trashed. That last thing I remember was watching her walk into the bedroom she partly shared with her fiancee, my best friend and roommate; Lucas. When I woke up the next morning, having slept off most of the day and my hangover, she told me I chased our third roommate, Todd, around the house screaming, "EAT MY NIPPLE, TODD!" and when I lost my balance, I fell into the window and broke it. I vowed then and there never to get that drunk in front of her again. I wanted to escape the pain, not create more for myself.

Saturday night, she spent with us too, so I escaped by means of going over to Todd's brother's house and smoking a little weed over there. When I came home on Sunday, she was still there, laying on the couch in the arms of the man I wish I could have been. But, she left Sunday night.

All that week, she came over whenever she could. Lucas and I were both on vacation. So whenever she came over, I was there too. I suffered and enjoyed the moans that crept out of their bedroom door from time to time.

Towards the end of my vacation, Lucas had to go back into work that Friday night and stay until closing time. He wouldn't get home until one or two in the morning. Todd, too, was out for the night. So I sat on the couch, anxious for the night to end. Around eight, Anya walked in the door, and caught me playing video games in our living room. She looked positively stunning that night.

Anya was the girl everybody wanted. She was fun, and she was beautiful. She was intelligent, but it was still easy to make fun of her for her mistakes. She was short, but she had a thin, proportional body. Her hair was long and dark brown, and her eyes were an entrancing blue. Usually, she wore casual clothes, often black, but sometimes she wore other colors. Occasionally, she had her hair up in a ponytail, and I saw it in a bun once. She never wore makeup, she didn't need it, and she always smelled wonderful. Anya was always casual, she never wore heels taller than half an inch, and she never wore skirts or even shorts. Tonight, she came in wearing three inch black leather heels, and a cranberry colored dress that ended just above her knees. She was actually wearing makeup that eccentuated her dark eyes and made them darker, and her complexion more pale. Her hair fell around her shoulders so elegantly, so beautifully.

I got up to grab a beer. I was going to need the alcohol this time. As much as I longed for her, the only girl I'd ever met that didn't care about cars or shopping, I could not have her. Anya was not available, and that hurt bad enough to drink. While I was in the kitchen though, she cornered me.

"Hey James, I wanted to say Thank you for the computer," she said softly. I turned to her, and began to tell her it was my pleasure, but she threw her arms around me. She layed her head on my shoulders, and pressed her body against mine. It was the best hug I'd ever had, and I didn't ever want it to end, but she wasn't mine to hold, and I had to let her go. Lucas loved her, and she loved him in return. They'd been together for a while, and they were happy. It was not my place to come between them, as much as I wanted to steal her away for my own...

She let go before I did, and said goodnight before she headed into her room and shut the door behind her. I sighed heavily and popped open my beer. It was going to be a long lifetime.

After a few drinks, I couldn't convince myself not to do it. I had to at least let her know I felt about her, maybe she felt likewise... or not... I had to hear it for myself. It was almost nine, and I knew she was still awake from the sound of the television on in her room. I knocked on the door softly, but she heard me and came to answer it.

She opened the door, and stood in the doorway, wearing one of Lucas' T-shirts for pajamas. She looked up at me earnestly. "Yeah?" she said. After a silence, the look she gave me was wracked with concern. "Are you okay, James?" she asked.

I took a deep breath, and lost control of myself. I took her by the back of her head and planted her soft lips onto mine. She didn't fight me, nor did she kiss me back, I'm sure she didn't really know what to think. With my strength and my intention, I pushed her into her bedroom, not caring about the door behind us. The television was on, but there was a towel draped over the screen. So the light in the room was very dim. I layed her down on the bed, and she started trying to push me away, but against me, she was weak. I felt up her perfectly round and perky breast with one hand and held her tight with the other. She slapped my hand away and I bit her lip to teach her not to do it again. She was mine, if just for tonight. My righteous consceince was gone completely and my penis guided me now.

I crawled on top of her, strategically placing one knee between her legs to keep them apart, while taking off my pants and groping her breast. My lips firmly planted on hers. She didn't make a sound. I kicked my pants off, my hard cock springing from its previous entrapment. My heart beat wildly as my fingers wandered down her sexy body and played with the top line of her panties. I lifted the shirt off over her head, which she fought, but I won. Her breasts were exposed to me now, and how beautiful they were! I bit her neck softly and a tiny gasp escaped her lungs as my fingers experienced her now horny nipples. She tried to push me off, but her strength, and now her will, was waning. I was taking control, and she was reluctantly letting me.

My fingers left her breasts, but I could still feel them under my shirt. I removed it to let our skin collide, and I enjoyed the sensation of being naked with Anya, the girl I thought I could never have. Her panties were harder to remove, so I ripped them off her, holding her down the whole time. She wriggled and tried to get herself free of my grasp, but her resistence was proved futile, and she gave in when my fingertips explored the folds of her pussy. My fingers got to know every inch of her southern region, and wetness appeared as I fondled her clit. She moaned more and more until I felt her body tremble beneath me and loads of her juices stained my fingers. I'd brought her to orgasm; against her will.

Now, my dick was rock hard, and pulsating. I'd heard Lucas occasionally boast about her tight pussy, and I wanted to see for myself. I wanted to be inside her. I wanted to be deep inside her... I thrust my cock at the entrance of her pussy, but didn't enter yet; she moaned. Slowly, I slid my dick inside her warmth, and I let out a loud moan of pleasure. Her pussy was every bit as tight as Lucas had let on to be. She moaned loudly, and I thrust it in deeper, feeding her hesitant hunger, and my lust. I pumped her as hard as I could without hurting her, and it didn't take long before her bouncing breasts, her soft moans of pleasure and pleading, and her tight pussy made me cum deeply inside of her. I layed my head down next to hers, and relaxed my body on top of her, my well satisfied cock still inside her.

When I lifted my head again to kiss her passionately, I felt a wetness on her cheek; she was crying. My heart fell and I pulled out at once. She curled up into a ball and covered herself with her blanket, crying quietly. Fear and guilt coursed my veins... I had finally gotten what I'd always wanted, but the consequence, to see the most amazing girl I'd ever met in tears because of actions, was not worth the hot sex... What was I going to do? What had I done?