Thank you for reading! This story follows the events of Bonfire and the earlier therapy chapters, but it can definitely be read as a standalone. All the trigger warnings!
Chapter 4
I couldn't bring myself to ask Megan for my third rapist's phone number. I'm not even sure it was Conor. Dr. Graham will have to be satisfied with the others, I think as I walk to his office, my journal tucked in my bag. I couldn't sleep last night, so I'd recorded everything that happened in the bathroom the night before. I made sure to mention that I don't know for sure that it was Brian who pissed on me before fucking my throat. Just like I can't be positive it was Conor who stole my anal virginity a month ago.
Dr. Graham is talking with someone when I enter the waiting room. It's another man, maybe another doctor or a professor. He is almost as tall as the doctor, with dark short hair and a broad build. The beginnings of a beer gut forming under his shirt and suit jacket. Dr. Graham holds up a finger without looking at me and they continue their conversation. I stand near the entrance, fiddling with a potted fern, and trying not to eavesdrop. It's not until I hear the word "victim" that I start paying attention. "She will be resistant." I hear the stranger say.
Dr. Graham shakes his head and I can't make out his response except for the words "resist" and "weak".
I look at my hands.
They're not talking about you
. I cough involuntarily and I hear both men pause their conversation. The stranger glances over at me before returning to Dr. Graham. "Has she been reliving her rape?" He asks loud enough for me to hear every word. The last one landing hard.
"She has been rubbing herself to the memories, but obviously since her orgasms only bring her shame and guilt, I've advised her to stop. I'm curious if she has been able to. Let's see." He turns toward me and calls out, "Susanna. How many times have you masturbated since our last session?"
I look up to him, then to the stranger and back to him. I don't want to answer this in front of another man, but I feel I have no choice. "F-five Doctor." I hang my head ashamed.
"I expected as much. Did you orgasm five times as well?"
I keep my eyes fixed on his shoes as I answer, "I tried, but..."
The stranger steps in, "You tried? What exactly does that mean."
I look up at him, still confused about who he is but not wanting to be rude I add, "I couldn't. I mean, I touched, but I couldn't...finish."
He turns back to Dr. Graham. "She
is
eager to please you."
Dr. Graham is smiling. "She's just eager to please."
"Interesting." The stranger turns and looks at me. He takes in my dark purple and blue dress, I can feel his eyes resting on my small chest, held up by nothing but the dress, before examining my hips. I feel myself wanting to spin so he can get a better look.
"Do you think she would be able to orgasm if someone else wanted it?"
Dr. Graham thinks for a moment, "If a man wanted, then yes. I don't believe she has shown any submissive nature toward women." Then he raises his voice, "Susanna, please go stand in my office."
I have to squeeze past both men to enter the room. As I move by him, the stranger's hand grabs my backside and squeezes. I gasp, but he holds me in place for a moment and I can feel his continual appraisal of my body. When he finally lets go he adds a sharp spank, sending me stumbling into the office. I hear him say, "Lovely ass on her", just as Dr. Graham closes the door.
I'm left alone, my hand slowly massaging my ass as my pussy throbs.
Do I miss being molested? What is wrong with me?
I cross my arms to keep them occupied and look around the room. I picture myself the last time I was here, legs spread wide open, rubbing my dripping pussy. I was so close to cumming. My pussy pulses, and I realize that the past 48 hours is the longest I've gone without an orgasm since the bonfire a month ago.
My eyes land on Dr. Graham's chair. I imagine him sitting there. His large muscular body barely fitting between the arms. His brown leather shoes planted on the floor. I wonder if what they say about foot size is true. If so, Dr. Graham would be huge in more ways than one. I picture myself on my knees in front of the chair. His hands wrapped around my hair, pulling me back. One shoe spreading my legs wider, and toying with my pussy. I hear myself gasp at the idea, just as the door opens behind me.
I freeze as though I've been caught doing something against the rules. My eyes avoid Dr. Graham in case they give something away. Sometimes I feel like he can read my thoughts from a glance, and I blush as he takes a seat. My downturned eyes notice he's wearing the same shoes, and I can feel my breath quicken and my heart race. I close my eyes in defense, but at the same time I feel the strange man pressing himself against me, his hands on my waist.
"Susanna, this is my colleague Professor Griffith." I feel the man's breathing in my ear as I try to steady myself. "He will be helping us today." I open my eyes, wondering what he could possible help with.
"N-nice to meet you professor." I say to the floor as his left hand pulls me back against him as his right hand slides up my body, pulls my arms apart.
"The pleasure is mine ,Susie." I gasp as he moves up and cups my right breast. He holds it gently, as though he's testing it's weight.
Dr. Griffith makes a note. "Let's review our notes from last time. Please interrupt me if I have gotten anything wrong." He flips back a page. "One month ago, you were raped by three young men. Before this had limited sexual experience, only kissing and using your hands on a friend named Will. The men took your oral, vaginal, and anal virginity." He looks up at me as though to confirm accuracy. My mind, which froze at the casual mention of my rape, stumbles to and I nod in confirmation.
"You offered little resistance to these men, your body responded pleasurably, and you orgasmed during your vaginal and anal rape." He flips a page.
"I-I asked them to stop." I whisper almost to myself.
"Speak up Susanna. Is there something you'd like to challenge?" He looks back, checking his notes. "I have here that during your rape you asked them stop three times, and one time you asked the unnamed man to please continue 'fucking your ass'. Is this inaccurate?"
"N-no it's correct, Doctor." Professor Griffith squeezes my both my breasts and twists softly as I pull the side of my dress in order to keep my hands busy.
"Since the rape you have been remembering the events while touching your clitoris and bringing yourself to orgasm. This happens on a nearly nightly basis, and although you are able to distract yourself with schoolwork during the day, you have forgone most social activities. After orgasming, you reported feelings of shame and guilt, to the extent that you have not been able to sleep. As a result you messaged rape hotline seeking support."
He pauses, and I nod at the floor to confirm his description. He continues, "Last session you chose to forego traditional psychotherapy in favor of cognitive-behavioral therapy. The cognitive portion of this therapy will focus on shifting your interpretation of your rape. We will replace your feelings of shame, guilt, and regret, with pride and eagerness."
I look up, confused at the idea that I could think of three boys raping me with pride, just then the professor whispers in my ear. "You're a beautiful little slut Susie. No wonder those boys took you."
Dr. Graham has leaned back in his chair, notebook in his lap. He makes a note. "Susanna, the professor complimented you. What do you say?"
My arms hang at my side and I feel myself flush more. "Th-hank you."
"Thank you, what?" Dr. Graham taps the pen on his notebook.
"Thank you, sir." I swallow as his hand tugs on the top of my dress.
"As I was saying, the behavioral component of this therapy will help you build healthier actions for yourself. As we established last time, masturbating seems unhealthy for you, since it results in negative feelings such as shame. Today we will establish whether you are able to orgasm while pleasing a man, as was the case during your rape."
Professor Griffith presses himself against me. I imagine his hard cock struggling to free itself from his pants.
"Did you do your homework Susanna?" Dr. Graham is waiting expectantly, as if for a tardy student.
"Y-yes sir." I nod as Professor Griffith squeezes my right breast. "I mean, I couldn't get all of their phone numbers," He twists the small handful through my dress, "B-but I got most of them."
Dr. Graham waits. I eye my purse on the floor next to me. "Th-they're in my notebook,"
"John, do you mind?" Professor Griffith pauses before kicking my purse toward Dr. Graham. I see it slide across the floor, the contents spilling out at his feet.
"Ahh" I gasp as his fingers pull my breast out from my dress, pinching and tugging my nipple.
"Shhh. There's a good slut."
Dr. Graham opens to my latest journal entry where I describe the events of two nights ago. A man, I'm almost certain was my roommate's boyfriend Brian, followed me into the bathroom to jerk off with my throat. To drive home how pathetic I am, before fucking my mouth he had pissed over my pussy and tits. I start tearing up as my Professor Griffith moves his left hand up to join his right, mauling my breasts. He's pulled against me and I can feel his cock pressing into my lower back.
After a few minutes he barks, "What's the story Doc?"
"Susanna, I want you to tell us out loud what has happened to you since leaving my office two days ago?"
I look over at him, feeling ridiculous with a man's hands squeezing my bare breasts. "B-but I wrote everything down." I regret speaking as soon as the words leave my lips, but before I can retract I feel a large hand connect with my right cheek, knocking me sideways. Professor Graham's arms, the only thing keeping me from being thrown to the ground.
"I-I'm s-sorry." I stammer through tears falling steadily.
"Shhh Susie it's okay. Why don't you get down on your knees, there's a good girl." I feel him pressing my head down, the rest of my body obeying as I kneel between the two men. The professor's hands grab my hair and hold me pressed against his thigh.
"Begin" Dr. Graham is reading my notebook.
I try to take a deep breath to calm my crying, and its through stifled sobs that I recall walking from his office in a daze and bumping into Brian who I'm sure caught a glance my rape journal. I remember how I woke up to Megan and Brian having sex next to me. How I laid in bed imagining it was me he was fucking until I was about to cum. How I could feel my orgasm slipping through my fingers as though it was running away from me.
As I speak, Griffith continues his assault on my breasts. Now I hear his fly open and out of the corner of my eye I see his growing cock, now released. I close my eyes before he starts rubbing himself on my face.
The professor's chuckles. I keep my eyes squeezed shut but I can sense how big he is from the sensation his cock makes as it rubs across my cheek. I smell his sweat and feel heat emanating from him, more powerful every time he pulls my head against himself. Then he relaxes his hold on my hair, letting me sink down, my backside resting on my knees.
