Beloved

Author's Note:

'

Beloved

' is an actual story, with *le gasp* a real, honest-to-god plot and character development. So if you haven't read the previous chapters yet, you will be entirely lost if you try to read this - For optimal enjoyment, please go read the rest of the series first. I promise it's worth it!<3

As usual, I would like to remind my readers that the events in this story are fictional and should never,

EVER

, under any circumstances be attempted or reenacted in real life. Like most of the works under the Non-Consent/Reluctance category, the things portrayed here are a fun fantasy to explore in a book or piece of erotica, but would be abhorrent and incredibly illegal/immoral in reality. Please enjoy it as the work of fiction it is!

Thank you SO MUCH to my amazing friends who are helping to proofread this and poke holes in my prose, they're amazing, and SO helpful! Y'all rock!

If you enjoy my work, please consider following, commenting, or leaving a rating - It really helps me out!!!

Happy reading! ;D

xoxo,

G.M. Gardner<3

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Warm...

Too warm...

I whined under my breath as I slowly resurfaced into the light, weakly trying to escape from the heat that was wrapped around me from every side.

It didn't budge, my arms and legs pinned by heavy, stifling softness as I gave another whine, trying again to free myself as a low, "Kitten?" reached through the last of the fog.

As my eyes fluttered open, Rand's face was the first thing to come into focus. He was hovering over me, the furrow between his brows smoothing out in relief as I blinked up at him. The world slowly trickled back and I realized that I was no longer in his room, but laying on my bed in the basement, the heat coming from what looked like every blanket in the house bundled around me like a burrito.

Rand peeled away the layers and helped me sit up, steadying me by the shoulders and guiding me back against the headboard.

"How you feeling?" he asked quietly, and as if that simple question was a secret password to unlock the void in my chest, I felt it spring back to life again.

Far weaker than it had been before I fainted and no longer achingly empty, its previously bottomless depths now cushioned with a forest's worth of soft sakura blossoms. Their petals fluttered as I was drawn like a moth to a flame to the deep concern in Rand's eyes, temptation rising to just lean forward and...

Goddamn it, not this again.

I slammed the door on that impulse, taking quick stock of how I felt before answering, "Not... terrible, actually? A bit shaky, but definitely not stirred. How long was I out?"

"Not long. Ten minutes? Fifteen?" Rand paused, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly. "Scared me to death, kitten."

I didn't quite know what to say to that, settling on an equally awkward, "Sorry, Boss," as I looked around and noticed that something - or rather, someone - was missing. "Um, where's Grant?"

Something flickered behind Rand's eyes, there and gone so fast that I might have thought I'd imagined it if it hadn't left a hint of strain lingering around their corners.

"Upstairs," he said shortly, heading for the door. "I'll get him."

Rand reached for the knob, and when it didn't turn he went to type the usual long-ass string of numbers into the keypad beside the door. When it blinked red in answer he frowned, quickly trying another code. When that also failed, he reached for his back pocket-

And

froze.

"What's wrong?" I asked nervously as Rand patted all of his pockets, cursed under his breath, and then tried yet another code that didn't work.

"Door's locked," he tossed over his shoulder as he headed for the bathroom. "One second."

I was out of bed in a flash, my little episode almost entirely forgotten as I also tried the knob and got barely a wiggle out of it. There was a weird clattering noise, and then Rand was back with - of all things - a bright orange walkie talkie in his hand.

"Safety precaution," he said, when I looked at it in confusion. "For emergencies."

"Where the hell was it?" I asked, trying to remember if there was any part of the bathroom I hadn't searched.

"In the air vent." Rand toggled the button on the side and spoke directly into it. "Pup? You there? Door won't open."

Silence.

He pounded his fist on the door a few times and tried the walkie again. When there was no response, he held it out to me.

"You try."

"I'm not sure he can hear us-" I began, and Rand shook his head grimly.

"Nah." He jerked his thumb towards the keypad. "One code down? Maybe. Three codes? Not a chance. Nicked my phone too."

Realization dawned as to what he was trying to say, and I stared at him with growing horror. "You mean you think Grant locked us in on

purpose

?"

"Sure looks like it," Rand said curtly, leaning his shoulder against the doorframe and nodding at the walkie talkie. "Try it, kitten. Bet he picks up."

I took a deep breath to steady myself before saying directly into the mic, "Hello? Grant? Are you there?"

As I let the button go there was a radio hissing sound, then a beep before a slightly staticky - and far too cheerful - "Well-well-well, Sleeping Beauty finally decided to wake up, hmm?" came through from the other end of the line.

This fucker, I swear to god...

Rand obviously shared my sentiments, his expression turning back into that cold stone I remembered all too well from the day before as he eyed the walkie like he'd like to reach in and pull Grant through the speaker by the scruff of his neck.

"Grant," I answered, as calmly as I could manage. "What the fuck did you do?"

A pause. A beep. Then there came an unapologetic reply of, "Oh, you mean the door thing? Well, you see I've decided a bit of one-on-one time might do the two of you some good. Nothing crazy, just a couple of days of-"

"

Days

?" I cried, as Rand clenched his jaw so hard I was surprised his teeth didn't crack.

Despite not toggling the button I'd evidently yelled loud enough that Grant heard it upstairs anyway, a chuckle coming through the speaker. "Yes, pet,

days

. You're welcome, by the way," he added, sounding so smug that I wanted to smack him. "You too, Boss."

Before I could ask why in the hell he thought we would be thanking him, Rand took the walkie-talkie and growled into it, "

Explain

."

"Explain what, honey?"

Now, like everyone else, I have plenty of flaws.

Some I like to admit, plenty I don't, but anyone who knows me well will vouch for the fact that my temper is by far the worst one. It's not an anger management issue, I don't just go off at the drop of a hat, but when I

do

get mad?

Watch the fuck out, because it ain't gonna be pretty.

This wasn't the first time Grant's syrupy-sweet innocent act had drawn my fire, but I was fresh out of rocks to throw at his head. So instead I grabbed the walkie from Rand before he could answer, my already aggravated anger flaring up full-force as I hit the button without hesitation.

"Grant, I swear to god, if you don't come down here and let us out

RIGHT FUCKING NOW

, I am going to make whatever the hell the big guy is going to do to you look like

child's play

," I spat into the mic, my voice so heated it was a miracle Grant didn't burst into flames. "I don't even

care

if you bury me in a cornfield afterwards, it will be

worth it

just to get to

finally

wipe that smug-ass smirk off your stupid fucking face.

GET DOWN HERE

and-"

I was still spouting off when Rand plucked the walkie from my hand, reacting to my hiss of anger with a surprised chuckle.

"Easy, killer," he said, holding the device up well out of reach as I tried to grab it back. "Settle down, now."

"I'm going to

murder

him!" I declared, practically vibrating with fury.

Rand gave an amused snort. "Yeah. Got that." He held me effortlessly at bay with one hand as he said into the walkie, "Pup? You still there?"

"Sure am," came the reply, and I was gratified to hear Grant sounded slightly more subdued after my little tirade. Rand eyed the way I was practically foaming at the mouth, the corners of his lips curving in the hint of a smile as he leaned closer to the walkie.

"Figured out your punishment. For all this."

A muttered curse came through the speaker, followed by an utterly resigned, "And what are you gonna do, Boss?"

Rand's eyes met mine, and I swear to god he gave me the barest hint of a wink as he said in that perfect deadpan of his, "Sic kitten on ya."

I clapped both hands over my mouth to muffle my burst of laughter as Grant's shocked "I'm sorry, you're going to WHAT-" was cut off by Rand flicking the switch on the back of the walkie and tucking it back in his pocket.

As I went to speak he held up a hand to stop me, slowly unfurling one finger, then another. By the time his third finger was halfway up there came the sound of hurried footsteps on the stairs, then an annoyed, "Don't just hang up on me like that!" from beyond the door.

"Oh, don't even fucking start," I snapped back. "What the hell is going on, Grant?"

Rand joined me in glaring at the door as if he could see the man standing on the other side. "Open up, pup. Make this easy."

"Oh, you want things to be

easy

now?" Grant shot back, giving an incredulous laugh. "'

Easy

' would have been doing something before it got this bad, Boss. Do you think I'm blind? Stupid? Just because

you've

been sticking your head in the sand all damn day-"

"Was not," Rand interrupted sharply. "Been keeping tabs. Watching her. She's fine. Just skittish."

"Is she?" Grant countered, and I could have sworn I heard a quiver in his voice, almost like he was holding back tears. "I would beg to differ. Getting to the point of

passing out

-"

"Could be from anything," Rand said firmly. "Low blood sugar. Dehydration. Lots of explanations."

"Oh don't even try to give me that!" Grant snapped, "Stress is pretty high on the list of reasons people pass out, and - I dunno if you knew this, Boss - but dropping like that? Pretty damn stressful!"

Dropping what?

I wondered, but there was no time for questions as Rand answered him curtly.

"Sure. Wasn't that though."

"And I feel fine now!" I added quickly, a miserable sound from the other side of the door easing my anger just enough to take the sting out of my words. "He's right, I probably just got dehydrated or something, it's not a big deal. Some electrolytes and a bit of rest, I'll be good to go."

"Oh really?" Grant's voice was dull as a butter knife and just as metallic. "Can you tell me honestly that nothing else has been going on at all? Go on. Lie to me about it one more time, pet. Try to tell me you're just tired. I

dare

you."

The hurt in his voice hit me like a slap in the face, and I took an unconscious step backwards as Grant gave a harsh laugh. "Yeah. Didn't think so. God, you're both a fucking mess."

"

I'm

fine," Rand countered, rapping on the door sharply with his knuckles. "Let us out, pup."

"Oh, don't you lie to me too, Boss," Grant said angrily, and there was no hiding the way his voice broke this time. "Maybe you can hide it from her, but I know you too well to buy that whole 'strong and stoic' act you've been putting on. How bad is it? Scale of one to ten?"

There was that same strange flicker behind Rand's eyes, unmistakable fatigue in his quiet answer of, "Six. Maybe seven."

"And she's probably around the same? Maybe worse?" Grant snapped, sounding a little less sad and a lot more pissed off. "I could have sworn we had some sort of rule about things like this. Something about running, maybe? Ringing any bells?"

"Pretty sure that one's just for me," I chimed in, and to my surprise Rand's cheeks turned slightly pink.

"Nah," he admitted, glancing at me a bit guiltily. "House rule. Been around for years."

"I'm sorry, but what the

hell

-" I started, startled into silence as Grant banged sharply on the door to get our attention.

"Point is, I've put the two of you into time out in the hope that maybe - just

maybe

- you'll try actually fucking

talking

to each other." Grant paused, then gave a short laugh. "Or maybe just fucking. Either works for me, honestly, whatever the hell snaps you out of it."

Rand turned into solid granite at that, an involuntary shiver running down my spine at the sheer power in his voice as he growled, "

Open. The. Door

."

Deathly silence fell, the tension in the air so thick I could feel it settling deep in my lungs. When Grant finally spoke, it was in a perfect mirror of Rand's tone of absolute command, the giant's natural gravel replaced with his own particular flavor of hardened steel as the word rolled off his tongue so sharply I was surprised it didn't draw blood.

"

No

."

Rand cursed, taking a few furious steps away from the door before spinning around and coming right back. I waited for him to yell, to try to force Grant to obey, but when he spoke his voice was schooled into steady, careful calmness.

"Two days. Max."

"Four," Grant countered quickly.

When the hell did this turn into a negotiation?

I watched in astonishment as Rand considered that offer and then gave a curt nod.

"Three. Counting today. And-" Rand glanced at me. "Kitten gets fresh air. Two hours every day. Starting tomorrow."

"Done!" Grant said triumphantly, stamping the word into the air as if he were sealing an official document. "Pleasure doing business with you, Boss. I'll just leave you two to get settled in, hmm?"

Rand didn't bother to answer, turning on his heel to prowl angrily up and down the length of the room as the sounds of Grant retreating upstairs faded away, and I was left staring at the door with my mouth hanging open.

"What the actual fuck?" I breathed, trying to wrap my head around what I'd just witnessed. "Do you always negotiate with terrorists?"

"Only the cute ones," Rand said without an ounce of inflection, not missing a beat in his pacing.

I threw my hands up in the air, too frustrated to give two fucks about consequences as I said sarcastically, "Thanks, Boss, very helpful. That just explains everything, now doesn't it? Consider all

my

questions answered!"

Rand rounded on me and I stumbled backwards, my back hitting the wall as he came so close I could feel the fury radiating off of him like a furnace.

"Got questions?" he growled, "Try

asking

. Not mouthing off."

By all rights I should have been terrified. Instead a perverse, undeniably feminine thrill ran through me at his blatant show of aggression, my chest lighting up with fireworks even as my temper took the wheel again and I drew myself up, meeting his glare with one my own.

"Oh really? You want me to use my words? That's fucking rich, coming from you, Mr. Tall, Bald and Silent. Maybe if you-" I pointed an accusing finger at him, "-had used a couple more yourself, we wouldn't be stuck down here in the first place!"

Rand's nostrils flared, and he braced a hand against the wall by my head and leaned down threateningly. "Keep going, little girl. See what you get."

"And what the fuck are you gonna do, Boss?" I threw back at him, all sense of self-preservation going up in smoke as I stood on tiptoe to get right in his face. "Cane me? Don't think Grant's gonna be on board with that, but feel free to ask him if he'll bring it down here for you. Oh, wait..." I pretended to ponder, giving Rand a renewed glare. "That would require

talking

, wouldn't it? And apparently that's not your strong suit, so maybe-"

Rand moved to grab me, and I miraculously managed to dodge, taking advantage of his surprise to elbow him as hard as I could in the ribs. A flash of satisfaction ran through me at his sharp grunt of pain, but there was no time to linger on that small victory as I scrambled away.

By the time he recovered I was across the room, facing him down with my hands balled into fists at my sides. As he took a menacing step towards me I raised my chin in defiance, heart nearly pounding out of my chest with adrenaline as I braced myself for his incoming assault.

Rand took one more step and stopped dead, running his gaze slowly down my defensive stance. When his eyes met mine that strange flash came again, but this time whatever it was seemed to stick, settling in those inky depths as his face twisted into a strange expression that I hadn't seen from him yet.

In any other situation I might have said he looked startled. But before I could even begin to try to think of a better interpretation, Rand turned on his heel and disappeared into the bathroom, slamming the door far harder than necessary.

I heard the shower kick on, my anger fading to make way for confusion as I stared after him.

Didn't he already take a shower this morning? Why the hell would he need to-

And then, in a flash, I knew exactly what Rand was doing.

Way back in my early twenties, I'd dated this one asshole, the mixture of his good looks and my own naivety making me stick around far longer than I should have. I'd lost most of the details to the years between, but I'd never forgotten about all those nights he'd tear me to pieces and I'd go 'take a shower', because I knew if I broke down and cried in front of him it would only make things worse.

It was enough of a hunch to make me tiptoe across the room, holding my breath as I pressed my ear against the bathroom door.

For a moment I heard nothing but the steady sound of the water, rhythmic and unchanging, confirming he wasn't standing under it. Then beneath the white noise rose the sound I'd already known I would hear, lower and deliberately hushed but the pain in it unmistakable. As it was quickly stifled, I eased the door open without bothering to knock, already knowing what I would find waiting inside.

Rand was sitting on the floor with his back against the side of the tub, knees drawn up to his chest and his face buried in his hands. Those broad shoulders were shaking silently, and I was struck by how very

small

he looked, the almost childlike way he curled in on himself as he choked back another sob before it could even fully start.

God, you're both a fucking mess

, came Grant's whisper in the back of my mind, the words floating away in a flutter of cherry blossom petals as I stepped forward as if being pulled by an invisible thread.

As I settled on the floor beside him, Rand's entire body tensed, his weak protest of, "Kate,

don't

," ignored completely as I leaned my head against his shoulder.

I didn't speak. Didn't try to wrap my arms around him or offer more comfort than I wanted to give or he was willing to receive. Just wordlessly offered myself up as a bastion in the invisible battle he was facing and promised a truce between us for however long it lasted, for whatever it was worth.

After a long moment of hesitation, I felt Rand accept my offer, a shudder running through his massive frame as the floodgates opened and he dropped any attempt to conceal his misery.

As he collapsed into big, utterly heartbroken sobs, the remnants of the aching hollow in my chest rose like a half-filled helium balloon in answer, whispering that maybe - just maybe - I hadn't been alone in facing down that cold emptiness all day, my breath catching as tears began to streak my cheeks as well.

Any thoughts of Grant or our current predicament were tossed by the wayside, forgotten completely as we laid all those fake smiles and impassive glances out on the cold tile floor without saying a single word, letting wave after merciless wave of saltwater crash down around us.

I let myself drown.

Surrendered my entire being to the all-consuming act of

feeling

, not even trying to fight against the undertow as I drifted bonelessly down into those dark depths. I could feel Rand sinking right along with me, the murky water concealing him from my sight as it claimed us both unapologetically, dragging our limp bodies down until the surface felt like nothing but a far-off dream.