I was short on milk and so I decided to nip down to the shop to get some. Now the only thing I needed was the milk and it was a very pleasant day so I decided that I wouldn't bother using the car. It would actually be faster to grab my old bike, cut through the path to the new road, and zip straight down to the shop. Going by car I'd have to travel five times the distance.
So there I was, free-wheeling down the hill, when this whacking great car came screaming around the curve, aiming straight at me. I didn't stop to argue right of way, I just abandoned ship, throwing myself to the side. I skidded along the road but fortunately my jeans stopped any gravel rash, although the sound of asphalt scaping against your helmet is a very nasty sound to hear.
My bike vanished under the wheels of the car, which was rather unfortunate, but sooner it than me. I scrambled to my feet feeling rather hard done by, looking for the author of my woes. He was getting out of the car and didn't look too pleased.
"Are you hurt?" he asked, which I suppose was considerate of him.
"No," I snapped, "no thanks to you. Why the hell did you have to pick this road to practice driving on?"
"I am an excellent driver," he snapped in return. "I can't be held liable for some idiot cycling in front of my car. You do know cars use the roads, don't you?"
"Not this one," I pointed out.
"But here I am," he retorted in a rather snide voice.
"Which brings us back to my original question, why? Hunting for small game you can run down? If you're not just practising to drive I can't think of any reason you'd be here."
"I'm just passing through. People do that you know, drive down roads on their way to other roads."
"People who drive down roads on their way to other roads don't drive down this road. It doesn't lead to any other roads. Normal people read a map and follow roads that actually go somewhere."
"This road joins up with Rosemont Avenue," he kindly explained.
"Not yet it doesn't," I just as kindly explained. "It stops a hundred yards short. That behemoth you drive won't fit down the track that runs through to Rosemont."
"Excuse me?" He sounded a little nonplussed.
"They ran out of money," I told him. "They'll budget extra next year so they can finish it off. Until then no-one uses this road. They even have a temporary dead-end sign at the start of the road."
I smiled, having won the discussion in my opinion. He was obviously totally in the wrong over the whole incident.
"Can I have your insurance details, please?" I asked.
"Why? You're not hurt and there's no damage."
"You've destroyed my bike," I pointed out, pointing to the mangled mess under his wheel. "I'll have to buy a new one now. And I'll need to buy a helmet. I wouldn't trust using this one again."
I held it up to show the rather nasty scrape on the side of it. It made my stomach turn over thinking what would have happened if I hadn't had the helmet on. From the look on his face he was imagining it too.
"And you expect me to pay? I have to admire your chutzpah, but the accident was entirely your fault?"
"Really? I wasn't driving too fast on a dead end road. If you'd taken the next bend at that speed you'd have found yourself facing a tree that wouldn't jump out of your way. You were actually quite lucky I was here."
"If I'd been any luckier I guess I'd have been washing your blood off my car. Either that or recovering from a heart attack."
Sarcastic swine. I just grandly ignored what he said.
"Whatever, there was an accident and I require your insurance details," I told him. "You're required by law to give them to me. We can let the insurance company decide on who's to blame."
I actually had him cold. His excess would be more than what I was claiming and the insurance company would just dump it on him, and they'd probably increase him premium for having been in an accident. If he went to court over it his legal fees would outweigh the damages I was claiming. It was lose all the way for him. I gave him a nice sunny smile.
"You're really an insufferable brat, aren't you," he observed in a dry voice.
"Hey, be fair. I'm only trying to get justice and recompense for my lost bike and damaged helmet. It's not as though I'm asking for damages for physical pain and the emotional trauma of nearly being run down by a dangerous driver. And at twenty I think I'm a bit old to be considered a brat."
He turned and looked at the remains of my old bike. The only things bright and shiny about it were the scratches caused by the accident. The paint was faded, the chrome non-existent, rust aplenty, with the rust probably all that was holding the frame together.
"I really think that you should give me five bucks to take that excuse for a bike away," he scoffed. "However, in the interests of 'fairness' I suppose I could give you fifty for the bike and fifty for the helmet, although I doubt that you'll actually bother to replace either item."
"Of course I'm going to replace them," I snapped. "How am I supposed to get around without my bike? And, really, what sort of bike do you think I can get for fifty? I think a hundred minimum for a reasonable bike."
"Why should I pay a hundred for a reasonable bike when you didn't have one to start with?"