A Voyage of Discovery

Initiation and the end of innocence.

I guess most people have some little kink that they think they have kept secret. Maybe you wish you could tell your partner but maybe don't because you fear getting a negative response. I managed to keep mine secret even after ten years of marriage. I wonder now looking back on that day when my wife made the fateful discovery if I had somehow led her to it. If I had wanted to be found out. Of course I did want her to find out, I wanted to share my pleasure with her but I was afraid she'd be disgusted and it might damage our relationship.

Up to that point we had a good marriage. At least I thought so. We shared most of our interests and enjoyed an active sex life. Well, we had sex reasonably regularly. It had always been a very vanilla sex life but we had intercourse with a little bit of foreplay about once or twice a month. I loved giving oral sex and I had experimented with slipping a finger in her anus whilst tonguing her or rimming her out but she usually squirmed and told me to stop. I loved receiving oral too though she stopped that a few months after our wedding. She told me she didn't really like the feel of my cock in her mouth.

I had bought her a few toys over the years but she told me she wasn't really into that. Nonetheless, she had an absolutely fabulous body, very athletic, with pert little tits and a gorgeous firm arse. We went to the gym together about three times a week and she ran a lot. I used to notice other guys eyeing her up and felt proud she was mine. Then there was that little kink that kept nagging away. You see, my first ever sexual experience had left an itch.

I had a very sheltered upbringing. My father left home when I was small, my mother never explained why. Then my mother decided to home-school me from the age of about ten. She was a very strict woman and an evangelical Christian. I know that taking me out of school had something to do with her not agreeing with sex education but she never actually felt the need to explain to me. With no siblings, the only contact I had with other kids was through the home-edder groups my mother found and she always made sure she was present to supervise me.

At home, when I grew up a bit and started to get pubic hair she would insist on being in the bathroom when I bathed and when I used the toilet I knew she would hang around outside the door, so I had to be quick. When I got to university at the age of 18 I hadn't even masturbated and I had been taught that nudity was definitely a sin. The closest I got to seeing any porn was the underwear section of my mother's home-shopping catalogue and when she caught me looking at that one day I got bellowed at and made to kneel in prayer for the rest of the day. So, I was kind of scared of girls because I was worried about temptation and when I awoke with an erection at night, I worried that I was going bad.

I had always been quite fit and enjoyed sport so I joined the soccer team at Uni. I quickly made a good friend. Brian was taller and stronger than me and really super-confident. He made everyone laugh, so he was a good person to hang out with. I thought I was very privileged when he invited me to his room for tea one afternoon after a seminar. That was when my kink got started. At first the wrestling seemed just a bit of fun but then he really started using his weight to pin me down and made me say "uncle" in order to be released from a hold. Then, after about the third time, he didn't let go. He had me pinned down in a half-nelson on his bed and he reached round with his free hand and undid the belt and the fly on my jeans. Before I knew what was happening he had thrust his hand in my pants and gripped my cock. He pulled it out and laughed. "I knew you were a faggott". He said.

"What? I'm not a faggott" I tried to shout but my face was being squashed into the bedding. "How come you've got a raging hard-on then?" "I, I..." I couldn't answer. I did have a raging hard-on and his hand round my cock felt fantastic. He started to wank my cock slightly and I just turned to jelly. Still pinning me down, Brian pulled down my jeans until my whole butt was exposed, then started to probe my anus with a finger. I let out an involuntary moan. He really didn't need to hold me down any more because I wasn't resisting. Then I could tell he was undoing his own jeans and wriggling out of them. I knew he was well hung because I'd seen him in the changing room after soccer training. I rarely showered with the others because I'd noticed my cock was on the small side compared to most of them. Besides, nakedness was embarrassing.

I genuinely did not know what he was going to do next. I could feel something kind of blunt and hard pressing up against my ring. "I know what you need faggott" he breathed and then the pressure grew and I could feel myself beginning to come open. Then my muscles seemed to clamp down and Brian grunted "stop resisting you little faggott, push down like when you use the toilet". I did as I was told and then I felt a popping sensation and a slight burn as he finally pushed right through my sphincter. He reached round my front again and grasped my cock which had gone a bit limp and as he started to thrust in and out of my arse, I got stiff again. It must have been under a minute when Brian groaned again as he unloaded inside me and I felt the pressure start to reduce as his erection subsided. He carried on working my cock back and forth until finally I felt all the blood in my body rush into my face as I exploded, spilling cum about half way across the room.

As Brian slipped his arm out from under me and slid off the bed, pulling up his jeans I could feel a trickle of wetness run across my butt cheek. I lay still, stunned, tingling from head to toe. Whatever that was, I wanted it again.

Over the remainder of that academic year, Brian buggered me regularly. He also taught me to masturbate and often made me kneel in front of him whilst wanking myself off. He also taught me how to suck cock and sometimes made me swallow his spunk.

He left Uni next summer and I never saw him again. I masturbated pretty much every day from then on and always with something in my arse, at least a couple of fingers and often a deodorant can or something similar. I was too embarrassed to buy sex toys. Then, I met Jenny.