"You fucking asshole."
"What? It was a slip of the tongue. I swear. I don't even know any Reginas." David said. "Please Cara, it was an honest mistake."
David barely dodged the thrown glass which shattered behind him.
"My name is Claire, you piece of shit."
"Sometimes my 'l's slip."
He dodged another flying object. There was no salvaging this one-night stand. Not after those two name gaffs. Why couldn't women wear name tags? It would make interactions so much easier. David danced his way through disaster to collect his things and hurried out to the safety net of the public eye. It was disappointing because he could tell she was going to be a crazy one in bed. Oh well, on to the next one. Since moving to the new city, there were plenty of fish in the sea. And he was just about to get his very own place.
***
David and Ariel stared up at the massive house on the secluded hill. He couldn't believe that it was now in their possession and it couldn't have come at a better time. With Ariel starting college and David starting his new job, they had both been dreading the laborious task of finding a place to live, until the manor came along.
According to their mother, their great aunt had long been forgotten by the family. Being the next of kin, their mother inherited the manor and had decided to let her children stay there to get their feet on the ground in the new city before coming and assessing the house's potential for herself. It was a win-win for everyone.
David followed Ariel up the winding path. It certainly wasn't the most accommodating place for visitors, and it was some distance from town. However, David was happy to live with those negatives in exchange for a rent-free place. At the top of the hill and in front of the house, an old sign hung by its final hook.
"The Matriarch Manor." David said. "What is matriarch, some sort of a bug?"
"It means mother of the household, dumbass." Ariel said.
"But she wasn't a mother." David muttered to himself.
The large pair of front doors towered over the siblings. David had never seen such a grandiose entrance before, and it demonstrated the true age of the house. He put the key into the door and unlocked it. Ariel grabbed one handle and he grabbed the other, pushing the large doors open and apart. Once inside, they let go and the doors shut behind them. The foyer was massive with a staircase on either side leading to the top floor. The sun shown down through an expansive skylight in the roof, bathing everything with a warm glow.
Ariel looked astonished. David was bewildered, but not by the wondrous display of architect before him. There was suddenly a strange feeling in the pit of his stomach. It was turning in knots and drawing his complete attention. He put his hand over the stomach as if all his problems could be solved by the simple act of a tummy rub.
Ariel clued into her brother's discomfort. "I told you not to eat two double cheeseburgers."
"It's not food related, it's just... Weird." David said.
He couldn't put his finger on it. He didn't have to use the washroom or throw-up, there was just a new sensation that he wasn't used to. Whether it was good or bad remained to be seen.
"Hey check this out." Ariel said.
In between the stairwells was another set of large doors and off to the side was a shelf with many pictures. Ariel picked up one with an older lady that looked similar to their mother. Sitting in front of her were ten men.
"That's a lot of kids." Ariel said. "I wonder why we haven't met them."
David grabbed the picture. "They look nothing like our family."
"Then why have a picture?"
"I don't know. Maybe Great Aunt Willis was into some kinky shit. Be careful, you might find a sex dungeon."
Ariel put the picture down. "Gross."
"Race you to the top of the stairs. Winner gets the pick of the bedrooms."
The siblings raced up either side of the staircase. As much as they bickered and fought, they still had fun together. That's why the living arrangement was going to work. Unlike their relationship with their older sister, Mary, they were closer in age and had more in common.
With the finish line in sight, David sped up, but somehow the distance seemed longer than the five steps remaining. When he got to the top, Ariel was already waiting.
"Took you long enough." Ariel said. "Looks like I win.
David keeled over to catch his breath while Ariel showed no signs of fatigue. Was he really that out of shape? The staircase itself was deceptively long and he couldn't believe that he had lost despite being faster than her in any other competition. The new feeling was still present, and David was doing his best to ignore it, but he suspected it was somehow responsible for his poor performance.
Down the hall were several rooms after rooms. The first few were virtually empty and could be transformed into anything from an office to an entertainment room to a guest bedroom. At the end of the hall was another set of massive doors. To the right was the only other room that had some character. It's pink walls and decorations matched well with the girl-tailored furniture which included a massive chest and a vanity in the corner. The closet doors lined one wall; no doubt retrofitted to contain a lot. It was the perfect room for Ariel and David hoped his room was just as well suited for him.
"This is cute. I'm sure you'll enjoy it." Ariel said.
"There's no way I'm taking this room."
"I won the race fair and square."
"But you haven't even seen the other room." David said.
"I don't need to. It's mine."
The problem with Ariel was that she wasn't a typical girl. She was girly in the sense that she liked to dress fashionably and made sure she looked good, but not in the sense that she spent her days shopping and gossiping. Like David, she was competitive and enjoyed a variety of sports. Her mean streak was not something that anyone would normally gather by looking at the sweet, innocent girl, but David had seen it plenty of times growing up. So, it wasn't a surprise when she opted out of the pink room. What was surprising was that David put up no further fight. He accepted her decision without the usual squabble they had over every controversial issue.
"Fine" David said.
Ariel looked sideways at her brother. He could tell she was ready to openly mock him, but then held back. She wasn't going to challenge him if that meant she truly won. Ariel moved with excitement to the next set of doors and opened them with both hands. It was everything David had hoped for in a bedroom. A king-sized bed. An area for television and reading. Its own personal walk-in closet that was about the same size as Ariel's old bedroom. And of course, no master bedroom was complete without a modern en-suite bathroom. They were the kind amenities a guest would hope to get in an expensive hotel room and now Ariel had them all to herself. It was too late to push back on accepting the smaller room. David had a chance earlier and he didn't take it. Now he was stuck in the small, girly room.
"Well, I think I've made the right decision." Ariel said.
She ran and jumped on her new bed, landing on her back. The more David looked at the room, the unhappier he was. Why did he agree to the other room? It was clearly better suited for Ariel, not only because it was more her style but because he was the older sibling. Despite losing the race, the family hierarchy dictated that he should have the biggest room.
David sulked and turned around to his new home. There was no point in fighting. Ariel would just complain to their mother and she'd win anyway. He'd make do with what he had. The whole room needed a drastic overhaul to fit his tastes, but it was one he could not afford and something his mother wouldn't financially support. There was no way he'd be able to bring girls back to his house with his room looking like a dollhouse Not to mention the optics of his sister being in the master suite. The decision seemed to get worse and worse the more he analyzed it.
Getting on his feet quickly and getting his own place became a more urgent goal than he anticipated. But if he wanted to resume his normal life, that was his only option.
***
Throughout the day, David unpacked his clothes and other items in his new room. The dressers with sparkling handles and the pink interior of the drawers were a constant reminder of his lose. Even the closet was more designed for a woman with an area for heels that thankfully could also accommodate his shoes. Not that he had many. Maybe it was a sign he needed to buy more.