The Analyst Pt 03

Apologies for the long delays. As they say, shit happens and so does life. I've been plugging away a little at a time on this for the last year or so till finally, the last 2 weeks has pushed this from the 20% mark to where I'm calling it done in this chapter.

Next chapter will be coming forthwith.

All

characters are over the age of 18. There is no one younger included in this story.

Cussing is not saying a particular set of words but rather stating something that will bring about the worst possible outcome.

The Analyst

The door was to an entry vestibule from the garage. Walking through, I was met with a site obscenely filled with shoes and jackets of varying sizes, shapes and tastes. I began to wonder exactly how many women lived in this house...

I pulled off the house key then ended up dropping my keys onto the hooks by the door as I followed Kylie through. The vibrations blooming in the back of her mind alluded that to how much the sudden changes had disquieted her. She was vacillating between being downright giddy to the other end of the spectrum, shaken to her core. I thought it might be a good idea to let her feel fully in control as we drove. At the same time, I wanted to make sure that if anyone needed to move my car, they wouldn't need to wait on us returning.

I placed my keys on one of the hooks just as Kylie had grabbed a set of keys, sliding on some fashionable sandals and making her way into the garage.

It was actually a

six

-car garage. Three of the doors led to the front of the house and three toward the rear. Two of the front three were occupied with large SUVs and two of the rear with smaller, less auspicious makes and models. Kylie headed toward one of these. Another friendly sight from the gym parking lot.

I piled into the passenger side and started typing our destination into the nav system as she buckled. Her eyes flitted across the dashboard before landing on my face.

She wants to hash this out for herself,

I thought as I put on a neutral face.

"I'm not even sure how to start this.... I mean, before today I've barely seen you and yet now.... I know that you know everything about me. I know that you...changed... something in me."

I kept quiet as I tentatively reached out, touching her hand. My first initiation of physical contact.

I watched in how the simple gesture both frightened and excited this beautiful young woman. I struggled to remain inactive as her mind both exulted in the touch and recoiled, trained after many years and abuses to expect this to be the first kind touch and likely one of the last. She expected me to ensnare her then to do the exact same thing the rest of her "boyfriends" had done, and the hurt would begin soon after. And yet...

The deeper I looked into her mind, the more I could make out the tentative

hope

that I was different. Her mind whirled in the possibilities. The present strength and missing pain had lessened the raw fear of the past and yet there was almost a glimmering thought

(hope?)

that I

would

take

control

of her. She knew that I could, and that I could do so in a way unlike than any other before. And yet, the conversations with Toni gave her the glimmer that this would be different.

"I'm hoping that it's for the better..." I started, subduing my internal turmoil at what she had experienced. The last thing she needed was to see my anger at the sad excuses for males that had traipsed through her life...

She snorted in return, her mask of self confidence sliding back in place. "I had guessed that."

Kylie broke eye contact, put the vehicle into gear and backed out of the garage before peeling out of the driveway, determination breaking the ice.

"Toni wanted me to talk this out with you. It seems that she was expecting...something like this to happen."

It was my turn to snort. "Yes, it seems that miss Toni knows more about what's going to happen today than the great prognosticator Nostradamus."

Another snort at my failed attempt at levity. Minutes sneaked by as she listened to the tinny voice of the Nav. She gradually put her thoughts in order enough that she began again.

"She's been telling me about you for the last month, acting like you two have been dating for years. But when she does, her mama will get the same look

her

eyes and make some correction about the story or her impressions or this or that, almost like she's in love with you too."

"Well, it's a little hard to explain..."

"We have some time to kill... Tell me about you two. Or you three as it may be."

I hesitantly started out. "This all sounds ludicrous, to myself even...

"I just met them both today. Our...meeting...seems to have opened my eyes to something I can do." I mused. "I seem to be able to...look

into

a person. Just the simple look and I'm able to assess things about them that. I think that's the best word anyway. It's definitely not stereotyping them. It's more like, I see how they dress, see how they move, listen to how they talk. These things give a surface perspective to most astute enough to pay attention. But then, I start to get more... It's not quite telepathy, at least I don't think so, but suddenly, I can almost read them like an open book. I can see details of their past, understand what brought them to where we're at. I can hear conversations they've had, or at least the general gist of them if they were actually important to the person. But like reading someone else's book, I'm more looking over their shoulder, seeing things from the side and both start and finish at the same time..."

Her eyes flicked over to me as she weaved through the lines of traffic. I met them with a half smile and a half shrug. God knows I was still trying to understand this, how was I supposed to explain it to her?

"Like with you... While it turns out that I actually knew you, or of you anyway, I couldn't just... grab your book and read it. Well, maybe I could, but that would've been rude. You had to let me, or at least I wanted you to. Initially, you clammed up and went full defensive on me, doing everything you could to block me from reaching out. From there, I began to understand that since you didn't know me, I wanted some help. Not that I needed it, but I wanted to make sure you'd trust me going forward. I reached out to Toni and...partnered with her? I think that's the best way to put it. It was like I borrowed her library card to get into the library. When we reached out together, you let us in...

"I was able to see everything that happened."

"Yes," she cut me off. "But then you did something else. What was that?"

"Well, I saw all the damage, and I guess my OCD kicked in." I chuckled. "I can't stand to see people a mess, so I cleaned it up, I think."

"You did more than that... All of the hurt from those

assholes

is gone. Its like I know what happened, but the fear of those is gone. It's more like watching a movie of what happened,

knowing

that it won't happen again. But how do I know this???"

I was able to see the concern and the relief at war as they flooded through her conscious thoughts.

She continued, "I can

feel

you still in my mind. Its almost like I know where you are...like I

know

that if I need you, you're going to be there."

All I could say was said with a simple smile at her.

"Is this real? Is this what Toni and Mama were talking about?" All of her concern was tied to this simple question, ignoring the underlying ramifications.

My attention was so focused on her that I had missed the fact that she had pulled into a parking lot. It looked like a deserted building not far from our destination. Kylie, slammed the brakes bringing us to an abrupt halt before throwing the car into park.

"IS...THIS...REAL?" she questioned, her eyes betraying the pleading of her heart and mind.

Time slowed to a crawl

I reached out with my mind, hesitantly at first...

The first touch of my mind to hers was like putting your hand in front of the vacuum hose you didn't know was on. I was

literally

sucked in, her desire for answers meeting her cravings for stability.

This was something I had first hand knowledge of, the depth of anxiety this could foster. The rollercoaster of emotional turmoil. The voracity of this hunger. These fiends were never far from my mind, even when I had the temporary façade of stability. I knew too much, saw too much, had ever understood the fleeting nature and

their

baited breath wafting on the breeze.

I began to realize that I had severely underestimated the scope of her issues while overestimating the ease of the fix.

With Toni and with Anya, it was like all of the work had already been done and all I needed to do was to understand what was in place in order to grasp how to proceed.

With Kylie, I was starting from scratch. I could see the path forward, the steps necessary to solidify and ground her. While I had done the demolition necessary to clear out the

crap

, I had missed the blatant neon signs screaming at me that was only half the battle.

The pain had been her structure. Like a dolt, I had figured I would come in, demo, provide some tools, and wave as I left, expecting her to sing my praises.

I'm a genius idiot sometimes. I go from A to G to Z and expect people to keep up. But I keep forgetting about the other 23 steps needed to make the proper transit. You know, the ones you're

supposed

to be following? The ones I keep skipping??

I made a mental construct of a door and proceeded to bash my mental construct of a head against it.

Apparently, since I was more or less in her head, I was conveying this to Kylie. Confusion crept like a mental fog at the images I was projecting, so I stopped. I stopped then put the door away and apologized profusely, explaining my lassitude and begging for forgiveness amongst the promises of fixing the issues.

Ummmm... I think I missed something... or rather a couple things,

I mentally explained.

Fix?

, was the rudimentary response thought. It seemed the general gist of thought was there but formulating the projection of the thought was slightly out of her grasp, like a toddler trying to communicate.

I can, but I think this is going to be a lot more...

intrusive

than I first thought. I'm pretty sure this one is not going to be pleasant. I want to make sure this is what you want. What you TRULY want. I don't think I can undo it if I go any further

YES.

Her mind screamed at me while her head nodded affirmative in the normal world.

The mental fog began to clear and I started laying the groundwork identical to what I had seen in Toni... well, more or less like what I had seen. Same basic principles with unique tailoring to match her individuality.

I started by impressing the mental construct theory and principles which would better allow us to communicate. I followed this with other tweaks, allowing her to initiate the contact, similar to what I had seen Anya and Toni do. It had come so naturally to them I almost missed that while I was providing the effective muscle to bridge the gaps, I didn't need to be the one to initiate the communication. The more I analyzed

what

Toni and Anya did, the more I came to understand the basis for it and thus the

how

to replicate it.

With that thought, I realized that I could now feel the mother/daughter duo at the crest of my consciousness. Kylie would never be a telepath, but as far as I was concerned, we would never be out of contact.

As I showed this to her, relief flowed over, palpable through our mental link.

And the...mesh..?

she inquired, testing out the focal thought construct.

That's a little more personal. You'll get to see me like I see you. The past and the present, unfiltered. Even if you like the person I am, you may not like the person I've been

She mentally nodded,

But at least I'll understand better the person who you've become.

Hell,

I

didn't even like the person I used to be.

Rather than fight it, I cast my thoughts to Tony...to Anya. I knew we were miles away, yet I also knew that their minds were touching mine, they had heard my side of the link. Together, they were pushing confidence my direction, faith in my actions, that they knew what I was doing and that this was going to be alright.

Those points, that warmth, that confidence....How could I doubt them? These two amazing women had already shown me so much. How much more did they have to show me?

Breathe deep and go with it,

I said to myself

With perfect clarity, I recalled the way I cast my self instinctually over to Toni and the way she had received me. There were specific differences in her mind's structure, in how she was able to process. It looked almost as if it was an upgrade(?).

Most people process information as a relative to themselves. This works in combination with native language structures and limits processing capabilities and speeds.

Toni, on the other hand, was processing information from the raw conceptual standpoint. This was allowing her process as a whole rather than parts in sequence.

While I understood the basis of the principle, it was difficult for me (but not impossible) to do myself. How was I supposed to make this work on someone else?

Toni's mind reached out again, opening itself like a flower.

Look closer... you helped me with all of this...

I pushed my thoughts back to her. As I looked at what we had done, I began to compare it to what she was offering now. Once again, I found the beating heart beneath the floorboards. Whether they were real or imagined, they belied the work of my hands. I followed these telltale signs as they yielded secret after secret. The closer I looked, the changes contained what I could almost call an instruction guide. It was a sequential layout of what needed to happen to make this...

meshing

... possible. I could barely believe that this change was possible let alone that I had obviously figured out how to do it.

My perusal and tutelage took barely a tick of the second hand. While all of this had been easy enough to understand in principle, there were still sequential steps necessary to form these links. My mind was assimilating these steps and changing to raw conceptual processing preternaturally. The more I listened and practiced with this, the faster my exchanges were becoming.

Toni pushed me back to the exchange with Kylie. Her actions belied her understanding of the present and the path that I needed to take in order to fully grasp each of the pieces of what I could do.

My focus returned to the prospect of changing Kylie again.

Are you sure you want this?

I asked as I presented her with my understanding of the myriad of changes that would need to occur in her mental processing.

She began to form the mental construct of a body. Well, what could ALMOST be considered a body.

You started all of this.

Her hands reached out to touch my face.

Don't half-ass it. Finish it.

The last phrase stung as it was imparted. She had no way of knowing how much background there was to that one simple phrase...

Hold on...this might be a little rough...

The first time I had done any of this work, it was the wrecking ball. This time, I knew that I needed to act the surgeon. This was half transplant and half laparoscopic, and overall just like rocket surgery.

As delicately as I was able, I started by bumping her pain tolerance to, well, infinite. Then I locked this beautiful creature down to where she couldn't move, physically or mentally. Those two I had done previously and knew just how to enact. The rest, while mapped out, it was still my first go round at it. And with her locked as she was, I knew that her breathing had stopped in the physical. I needed to get hustling.

I began to delve into the task at hand. As the changes began to start taking effect, I began to see changes in my own mind. As each step of my road may passed, I could see the effect on both her and myself. Step after step, I could feel the beginnings of the mesh taking effect, followed by a slight increase in the speed of the next step. At the same time, I could was starting to feel the lockdown on my own body as we became more entangled. I pushed back and released both the pain tolerance and the physical locks.

We would have to do the rest of this without those benefits. I pulled myself back into the binding.

The next change in her mind felt like someone punching me in the gut. Her hands appeared next to mine and grasped at me. All I was able to do was to lean into the binding, taking more of the impact of the changes. I began to pull at her understanding of the world, blending the visual, the audible, the sensory impacts with the originations of actions. Each step set another wave of confusion mixed with agony, both physical and mental, as her body and mind attempted to realign with the understanding I had garnered.

While her physical hold only slightly lessened, the effort needed to hold myself in check doubled. Each of the next changes pushed more feedback through the loop, giving my own high pain tolerance a run for it.

I gasped as I pushed the last change through. I felt her mind meld into my own, all of my past laid out before her.

When, I had initially meshed with Toni, the only thing that I felt from our joining was a sense of welcome. She knew me and I knew her. With Toni, the purest sense of acceptance overshadowed any need for guilt on my end.

The sensation with Kylie was completely different. I felt her as she parsed through my past. Each recoil from my own stupidity was a mental backhand. She began to rethink her decision...

And then...

Toni reached through our connection to Kylie and embraced her. Kylie's sense of confusion at Toni's devotion was more than apparent, and more than justified from my perspective.

Stop looking at the instances and look at the whole,

Toni beseeched.

When you began to work out, you first thought it was a goal. Now you know better. It is a journey. See his journey for what it is, for where he came from and what he has done with it. Now, look into me and see what he has done and will do, and you'll begin to understand...

I could sense as Kylie started to listen to her friend. The words became the raw construct and she stopped looking through the eyes of language and began to process concepts, taking years of my life and boiling them down into a single burst of occurrence. As she did, her judgement became less fierce bit by bit.

She saw me. She saw the real me. She saw what I had hidden from everyone, especially my wife.

She

saw....

Then, she understood. Then she smiled.

This

was

REAL

The next thing I knew, she had shoved me out of her head so fast, I had to blink to get my bearings. Then I had to blink as she lunged across the gear shift at me.

Kylie took my face in her hands, kissing my lips between muttered phrases.

"She tried to tell me...

"I didn't believe her...no one...like

that....

I can't...you..."

Her kisses became more fervent the longer she talked to herself.

In a desperate attempt to get some semblance of cohesion, I simply grabbed her head and kissed her deeply, letting our tongues intertwine. This forced her to stop talking and focus on the tongue in her mouth.

Her fervor lessened as the forced interlude brought the sheer shock to a head.

"I didn't believe there was anyone out there who was good enough... I thought they were all alike, like

them...

and they would always be there for their kicks, never looking to accept me as I am...