Rachel's Love Potion

"Wh... where am I?"

I was awake in a flash, darting to kneel beside the sofa. Joanna was looking around in confusion, eyes squinting despite the single candle lighting in the room. She must have hit her head harder than I'd feared.

"I'm here, Jo. It's me. You're OK," I assured her. I took her hand and squeezed it firmly.

"What happened? One minute I was in the pool, and the next, I... I don't remember." She frowned.

Oh thank goodness. Sitting here all evening with nothing to do but fret, I'd had all sorts of scary scenarios cooked up. Her not remembering was decidedly for the best. "You took a drink, and then fainted on the spot. Knox and I caught you, but you're only now waking up. It's..." I glanced at my phone. "It's going on two in the morning."

"I fainted, and you brought me inside to lay on the couch? For what, like, six hours?"

"That's right, hon. I'd have stayed by your side all night if I had to."

She fought to sit up, but gave up halfway, groaning. "Why the fuck didn't you two take me to a hospital? Christ almighty, Rach, I could have been brain dead for all you knew."

I laughed. That was my Joanna, surly as ever. "Yeah, I guess I should've, huh. But hey, your health insurance will thank me for it later on down the line."

"Assuming I still have two brain cells to rub together. Damn, my head is pounding. You got any tylenol? I'd ask for something to wash it down with, but since the last drink you made me nearly killed me, I think I'll just chew and swallow."

I hurried to comply, bringing her a glass of water anyway. She downed it greedily, and I quickly brought a refill. She was sitting upright by then, which I took as a good sign, and I took a spot next to her. I know it was paranoid on my part, but I was tensed and ready to leap into action in case she fainted on me again.

Joanna eyed me with open judgment. "Are you really still wearing your bikini? You laid me up all evening and didn't even bother to get dressed?"

"You're still wearing yours," I pointed out, gesturing to the huge half-revealed boobs, pale skin practically glowing in the dark where it spilled out of her suit. She didn't laugh. "Kidding, Jo. Relax. I dunno, I guess I've gotten used to keeping it casual. If it bothers you, I can-"

"No, whatever. You keep it warm as hell in here. But hey, yeah, speaking of. I guess I fainted before we had a chance for me to ask you what the fuck gives with that creep Knox."

Creep? What on earth could she be talking about?

"Oh yeah! I didn't even know how much of a chance to talk you guys had gotten. Did it not go well?"

"Of course it didn't go well. Come on, Rach. I'd been holding out hope he was at least really good-looking but maybe too old, or rich and classy but not cute enough to date. Maybe even just really,

really

funny. But that guy? He's a million miles below our league. Why the hell are you treating this bum like he's the best thing since... well, me?"

"Well, so much for playing matchmaker," I sighed.

She spat out a mouthful of water all over the living room floor. "Match...?! Rachel, I said I'd

meet

him. You seriously thought there was a slab of bacon's chance in fat camp I'd give

that

guy the time of day? Fuck, I know Ian isn't the best I've ever landed, but you really thought my standards had just up and died?"

"No, but..."

"But what? God damn, baby girl, what is going on with you? I mean seriously, does this guy have you under some kind of spell or something?"

For a moment, I actually stopped and wondered. I know she was only using an expression, but... Knox was an actual warlock, and he did have an actual love potion recipe thoroughly marked up in his library. Could he have...?

But then reality caught up with me, and I almost laughed at the absurdity of it. If he'd used a love potion on me, then I'd

love

him. Who would go to all the trouble of brewing a potion to turn their neighbor into their bestest friend? If all he was after was making me his love slave, what the heck good would that do him? I made a mental note to tell him about it tomorrow - he'd get a kick out of that. Once he was done fucking my butt, that is; he'd texted me earlier to tell me to make sure I was lubed and ready when he got here in the morning.

"Joanna, it's really nothing weird. We met at this neighborhood picnic thing I went to with Jim earlier this year, and we just hit it off. His looks, his money, none of that has anything to do with anything - and it's honestly a little hurtful of you to suggest it might."

She didn't look chastened by my rebuke. "OK, so what is it then? What is it about this guy that makes you so fucking eager to let him dress you up like some teenie bopper whore? Why do you let this totally unremarkable pig come into your house and use you-"

Joanna was ready to go on; I knew how she got when she was in a judging mood. But she had crossed a line, and I was not having it. "You know what? I don't have to justify myself and my choices to you, or anyone. I

like

Knox. As a

friend

. Nothing more. And if we're not the boring cookie cutter buds you want us to be, that's not my fault or my problem! But I'll be darned if I'm going to sit here and listen to you call him names and run him down when you don't even know him!"

She gaped. "Rachel, what the fuck are you-"

I stood up, folding my arms - then pausing to tuck my left nipple back into my bikini top. Darn skimpy thing. Knox always picked out the teensiest little outfits for me, as if regular bikinis weren't scant enough. "I'm going to bed. You can sleep on the couch, or if you want I can call you an uber. But I am done with this conversation."

With that, I stormed upstairs and slammed my bedroom door behind me. I honestly don't know if she stayed the rest of the night or not, but when I woke up to start prepping some scramby eggs and my butthole for Knox, Joanna was gone. And to think I'd been worried I'd hurt her, when all she'd wanted to do since the moment she came over was hurt me.

Knox didn't laugh at the love potion joke at first, by the way, but after a minute, he broke down so hard his cock slipped right out of my butt. I knew he'd think it was funny. A real friend is someone who gets even your most ridiculous jokes.

I could hardly believe it when Joanna texted me that night to ask if I wanted to hang out, have a proper pool party. Just

hey lets do ur pool proper 2nite

, like she was under no obligation whatsoever to make things right. I opened the text, but boy howdy did I leave her judgmental booty on read. If she couldn't even acknowledge my feelings, I sure as heck wasn't going to let it slide knowing she was harboring such thoughts.

"Use me," she'd said, like she wasn't right that moment trying to use me. What was the difference between her using me for my pool, and Knox using me for my pussy? To me, it was the same thing. They were friends, and I was only too happy to accommodate them. I already had both of them ready and available; why would I begrudge my friends taking enjoyment in them? Why was that so hard for her to accept?

She tried again the next day, though this time it was raining and chilly out, so she went for a dinner date invite with her and her boyfriend Ian and his buddy. Because of course, she wanted to set me up with someone. I knew how her mind worked. She couldn't believe me and Knox were nothing but friends, and she was figuring if I met a guy, someone closer to my age, someone attractive, I'd forget about him and things could go back to the way they were. Knowing I couldn't ghost her forever, I settled for a simple

I'm busy

and went back to my book.

The next day it was a more direct notification that she was in the area and "was going to stop by;" I'd already booked the whole afternoon for a marathon BJ with Knox, and I informed her as much. (More or less. She didn't need to know the gritty details of what he and I were up to.) So she said she could hang out that evening, but by that point Knox had impaled himself on my face again. By the time he was relaxed enough that I could consider splitting my attention between those long, lazy slurps and trying to text her back, I'd talked myself out of it. Here was Knox, willing to give me his whole day, not judging me even though my fellatio-smudged lipstick probably made me look like some kind of killer circus clown, while all she wanted was for me to push him out the door.

The next day was Saturday, and I'd already notified her that I was out on a friend date with Knox and not to bother. It was a nice relief from that cloying guilt - I

hated

being in fights with my friends, no matter how justified I might feel. Still, I was incredibly grateful for Knox. He took me to this gorgeous local orchard. I spent all day picking fresh apples and browsing the adjoined farmer's market while he restocked on some herbs and fungi he could use for his experiments. I was doubly grateful for Knox's presence, because he convinced me to go in nothing but a pair of cutoff overalls, so I was all cleavage and sideboob (such as I had) and booty, and it was up to Knox to keep all the guys who were leering at me from getting too handsy. As it was, by the time we left I had a fan club following along behind me like a flock of baby ducklings. Knox joked that I looked like such a redneck trailer trash hooker that I was probably going to wind up in the promo materials for the farmers only dating website. Isn't he a kidder?

Sunday, Joanna didn't text me until pretty late, asking only to talk things out. I, however, was in the middle of one of my frequent and lengthy masturbation sessions. It's sort of embarrassing to acknowledge, but because Knox spends so much time treating me like his personal sex slave, I have actually been kind of generally horny a lot of the time these days. See, friendly as he is, Knox was pretty bad about remembering to get me off, too. Plus dressing sexy like this all the time, knowing that somewhere out there people were watching me on those cameras, some of them probably... you know...

I dunno. Don't judge! A girl has needs is all.

So by the time I finished a very dreamy fantasy about this super cute hunk on

The Bachelor

and collapsed with a delighted sigh onto my pillow, Joanna was already in bed for the night.

Still, she'd at least reached out to me and acknowledged things weren't right between us, so I threw her a bone and at least put a point on what I expected from her.

I don't have room in my life for people who are going to try to tell me who I can be friends with, and what that friendship looks like

, I wrote.

So unless you're ready to apologize and promise you're going to be cool with him from now on, there's nothing left to say.

More words almost followed, but I recognized that was just the hurt trying to come out. I left it at that.

Besides, Knox wanted to come over and see if his ointment that was supposed to grow my boobs had done enough work to make them properly fuckable. He wound up super bummed that they were still a bit too small to feel the way he wanted, but to my mind, they were already getting pretty big. I didn't wear bras any more, but last time I went to the mall, I'd tried a few on to see where I was at. I was almost a C cup, which was pretty crazy considering I'd been a biggish A before Knox came along! He was helping me move forward with my life in so many ways, even ones like this I hadn't even wanted!

Joanna wrote me back bright and early Monday morning while I was making Knox's breakfast, and I almost dropped the carton of eggs when I read it.

sorry if it hurts you to hear it babe but your 'friend' is a fucking creep and i dont know what you see in him but I'm not letting you settle for being treated like his sugar baby

I was re-reading that when she wrote again.

so help me god i will make you see your better than this! just talk to me pleeez

My jaw was still working in numb little circles when the first tears leaked out. How

dare

she!

I blocked her on the spot without so much as a reply.

"What's wrong with you, tiny tits?" Knox asked as he slumped into his place in my breakfast nook.

"It's nothing," I said, passing him his plate. For once, he didn't even help himself to the portion I'd cooked for myself. He was so good at recognizing when that extra little bit of tenderness would go a long way. It only made me cry harder.

"Well knock it the fuck off. You're putting me off my appetite."

There was a gross combination of crying, sniffling and laughing at his attempt at levity, and I apologized as I sat down beside him. "I don't mean to be a pain. It's this whole thing with Joanna."

"Oh, the hottie with the big tits that you tried to drug?" I nodded. "What ever happened with that?"

"Yeah, that's Joanna. She was fine - woke up and didn't even remember what happened. Thanks again for that."

"My pleasure," he said, squirting a burst of syrup on my exposed boob and dabbing a forkload of pancake in it before shoveling it into his mouth.

With the syrup already there and threatening to trickle onto my lap, I did the same. "But yeah, we talked the next morning, and... she's been shitty ever since."

"Oh yeah?" he said, taking another bite. I was running out of syrup runoff, so I squirted another blob for him, this time aiming higher up so we'd have more time before it dribbled off.

"Yeah. And this morning, she..." I glared at my phone. "She crossed the line. I don't think we can be friends any more."

"That's too bad." I thrust my boob out to his questing fork. "Thanks. So what's the drama? You get jealous of how much more fuckable her rack is? You'll get there someday, Rach, don't you worry."

I rolled my eyes with a little laugh. "It's definitely not her 'rack,' ya horndog. No, it's... well, it's actually... forget about it."

"You got it." Knox leaned over and helpfully licked some of the sticky residue off of me.

"It's about you!" I blurted. It was nice of him to give me the room to try to forget about it, but I was in more of a venting mood.

He grinned. "Oh yeah? How so? She not like me dressing you up like a little fuck puppet?"

"No, she decidedly does not." I took a bite of my eggs and decided they were a little bland. I made sure to miss Knox's hair while I salted them as he sucked away on my nipple. "I told her I don't want to be friends with people who try to tell me who I can and can't be friends with, and she blew up at me. So I blocked her."

I ate in silence for a while as he suckled away, but when he pulled back, it was with that impish grin I loved so well. "So you're saying, if I tried to tell you not to be friends with her, you'd block me too?"

"It's different with you. You're my best friend, Knox. I know if you told me I should get rid of somebody in my life, it's because I wasn't seeing how I would be better off without them."

He shook his head. "I swear, you never cease to amaze me, Rachel. Come on, jack me off onto your eggs - I wanna see you eat that shit up."

I gave him a quick hug for being such a good listener and proceeded with the handjob. Once upon a time, I'd gotten kind of grossed out when he came in my food and drink, but the gag impulse went away when I convinced my brain that it was no different than when I sucked it out of his cock and ate a meal later.

Good ol' Knox, always helping me past my hangups and taking my mind off of my troubles. I was a lucky, lucky lady.

It was another week before I heard from Joanna again.

Well, no. Technically, she'd slipped two letters in my mailbox and even sent me - and Knox! - an edible arrangement. The attached note, as well as the letters, were full of requests to see me, practically begging me to give her a chance to explain. However, I wasn't interested in explanations. "Explanation" was Jo code for telling me why she was right and I was dumb for ever questioning her.

No. I was going to get an apology, or I was going to move on.

She ambushed me while I was out doing some yard work, pruning some of the hedges and trying not to notice how many of my neighbors were peeping at me while I did so. It would be nice if Knox would have left me something comfortable and slightly more modest to garden in, but I was making do with the same overalls I'd worn to the orchard, and tried not to bend over much. Or turn too fast.

"Jo? Oh my god, you look..." I couldn't finish the sentence, though a bunch of options were on the tip of my tongue. Miserable. Haggard. Distraught. Wretched. Her hair was disheveled, and she looked like she hadn't slept in days. Dark circles under her eyes, no makeup, her nail polish cracked and peeling.

"Yeah, I know how I look. And it's only half as bad as I feel, OK? So shut up and let me say this."

But my defenses were by now firmly in place. "Look, I haven't changed my mind. If you're here to-"

"I'm sorry, and I'm OK with you and Knox!" she shouted over me. Her eyes squeezed shut, like the words had pained her to say.

I hadn't expected that. "You're... you are?"

"I am. So can we hang out again now?"

I put my hands on my hips. "Why should I believe you?"

She frowned, taking a moment to frame her words. It was very un-Joanna. Usually she simply said whatever was on her mind and didn't give a hoot about the consequences. I was mystified.

"OK, so maybe I don't necessarily love your dynamic with Knox." She could see my hackles were already rising up, and hurried on. "But! But, I know you're a big girl, and you're free to live your life however you want. And I've missed you like crazy, so I figured I'd rather accept some stuff I don't like than lose out on my best friend."

I studied her for a moment. I definitely didn't like that she still had a chip on her shoulder, but her words were heartfelt, and I didn't doubt her sincerity. She looked like this was a realization that had been taken quite a lot of swallowing her copious pride to reach.

"I'm still going to be friends with Knox."

"I know. And that's... fine." She barely hesitated, but she did hesitate.

"And I'm probably going to keep dressing like this."

She looked me over. "I'm pretty sure the kid next door could fill his spank bank for the rest of his adolescence with that alone."

"Let him. I don't care." I did care, actually; it was pretty humiliating to be the neighborhood eye candy, especially for some skeezy teenager, but it was important to Knox that I display myself like this, and I supported my friend's ambitions unflinchingly.

Besides, the one time I'd tried to buy myself normal clothes, he'd cut them to ribbons right in front of me and threatened to make me go naked for a month if I tried it again. I may not have liked his decision, but I had to admit that when the guy thought he knew what was best for me, he didn't let anything get in his way.

Joanna took another deep breath, then nodded. "OK. Fine. So you're changing up your style. Cool. I can get on board with that."

"And how do I know you're not going to lose your cool if you see Knox doing something you don't like?"

"I'm not allowed to lose my cool just a little?" she said in a small voice, chasing it with a nervous laugh.

Give the girl an inch and she'd try to take a mile. "No. I'm serious, Jo. You already have two strikes on this. If you can't deal, say so, and... that's that." I did not have any tolerance for people being crappy to my best friend. Joanna of all people should know that, since she'd been my best friend for almost my entire life.

She seemed to wrestle with this pronouncement for a long while. I wasn't going to rush her. If she agreed to my terms, I knew it couldn't be forced.

"OK," she said. I was about to smile and draw her in for a hug when she went on. "But I have one small request. Just one."