Natalie didn't know what she expected when she walked into the waiting room of her gynecologist's office, but it certainly wasn't this. Honestly, she didn't really know that she expected much of anything beyond the uncomfortable but necessary routine of her annual breast and pelvis examinations; if there was one place Natalie didn't want to find an unexpected deviation from the norm, it was at her OB/GYN. So when she walked in to find a large banner behind the receptionist's desk decorated with streamers and balloons, declaring it to be 'PUSSY APPRECIATION DAY' in bright and cheerful pink letters, Natalie definitely wasn't ready for it.
Not that she had any kind of big dramatic reaction or anything. Weirdly, it was somehow too unexpected to react to--if the building had been on fire, Natalie could have at least slotted it into some kind of pre-existing emotional response and run or shouted or looked for someone who needed help. But to find the receptionist sitting in front of the desk instead of behind it, naked from the waist down and with her legs splayed wide enough to reveal a pair of light tan labia and just a hint of the slick pink cleft between... it simply didn't connect to anything but stunned, helpless bemusement. All she could do was blurt out, "what the fuck?" in a tone of confused bewilderment that totally failed to convey her shock and dismay.
Which meant that unsurprisingly, the receptionist completely misunderstood Natalie's reaction. "It's Pussy Appreciation Day!" she cried out, giving herself a loud smack right between the legs hard enough to make Natalie wince. "And to honor Pussy Appreciation Day, the first twenty-five individuals with vaginas to come in for appointments get a free vibrator--" She held up in one hand a sex toy so long and thick and multi-pronged as to be downright sinister. "And a copy of Doctor Hennessey's new book, 'Appreciating the Divine Cunt'!" She held up in the other hand a slim paperback volume with a picture of a vagina on it so lovingly and pornographically depicted it would put Georgia O'Keeffe to shame. Natalie had never regretted making an early morning appointment harder.
Then the receptionist winked. "Between you and me, we have enough to give away to at least a hundred," she said, dashing even Natalie's imaginary hopes of getting out of this incredibly awkward conversation. "But don't tell the doctor I said that. She wants all of you to really feel the special reverence and honor we have toward your pussy today." She gave herself another smack between the legs, not as hard this time but still startlingly intense. It was clear she was getting something out of it. Natalie didn't want to know what it was.
She took a step backward, already mentally committing herself to paying whatever cancellation fees were necessary to get out of this particular appointment on this particular day. "Well, that's great, and all, um... Carol," she murmured, squinting at the receptionist's name tag. She reached clumsily around for the door handle behind her and suddenly realized that she was terrified to turn her back on the cheerful and polite woman who couldn't have stood more than 5'2" in heels. "But I, uhh, I just remembered a scheduling conflict, my, umm, my dog is at the groomers and I need to go pick him up, I, I guess I'll have to call you back and reschedule." Natalie didn't have a dog, but she'd go out and buy one if that was what it took to get out of this. She didn't want to deal with half-naked women and strange new philosophies and whatever the fuck that dildo implied, not on a fucking Tuesday when she was still staring down the barrel of a half-day at the office. It was just too fucking much.
"Oh, but Natalie, you don't know what you're missing," Doctor Hennessey said, her calm voice cutting smoothly through all of Natalie's stammering excuses as she stepped into the waiting room. "I'd be very concerned if you came out of here without truly forging a connection with your own body, especially when it sounds like so much of your reluctance to really discuss matters of sexual health is purely due to social programming. You don't like to think about the importance of your cunt because the patriarchy has told you how shameful and dirty it is, but it's really more powerful than you can possibly imagine." Natalie was pretty sure that wasn't the kind of terminology a medical professional should be using, but she didn't want to argue. She just wanted to leave.
"That, um, that's a really good point, Doctor," Natalie replied, a forced and plastic smile on her face as she fumbled for the door handle with increasing anxiety, "and I'll be sure to discuss that with you further at our next appointment. It's just, I'm afraid I can't give you any more of my time today. I'm so sorry." She wasn't going to make another appointment with Doctor Hennessey, in fact she was giving serious thought to giving up on the healthcare profession entirely and trying self-surgery if that was what it took to get out of this, but she couldn't tell the other woman that. Not when Doctor Hennessey towered over Natalie again as much as Natalie stood taller than the receptionist, and carried herself with the stern authority of a medical expert.
"It's an excellent point, Natalie," Doctor Hennessey riposted, making Natalie realize just what a mistake it had been to concede anything in the conversation to a woman so bound and determined to evangelize her weird new psychosexual philosophy. The statuesque blonde was naked from the waist down just like her receptionist, with a lush and furry mound of curly pubic hair directly above her glistening labia, and Natalie realized to her utter mortification that the doctor had been masturbating before she came out into the waiting room. "That's why we need to take at least a few minutes to discuss it before you go and get your dog--what was his name, by the way?"
".....Spot," Natalie finally blurted out. Her fake smile was now so wide it was beginning to hurt her cheeks.
"Before you pick up Spot," Doctor Hennessey resumed, a tiny little crook at the corners of her mouth suggesting an amusement that was much less feigned. "The point is, Natalie, I don't think you've ever really taken a moment to really listen to what your cunt has to say to you. You've been treating it simply like a body part, something you don't even think about unless you're horny or you're on your period, and as a result you're not really making the kind of connection to it that would allow you to develop a holistic appreciation of your own sexual health. You should be communicating with your pussy, Natalie. All the time. And until I teach you to do that, I think you're never going to find true fulfillment."
Natalie opened her mouth, struggling to suppress the urge to point out that her vagina was an actual body part and that it was really fucking weird to hear a doctor call it literally everything but that... but she'd dealt with too many smug dudes to fall for this trick, even if it was coming from a woman. Argument was what they wanted. Argument sucked you in and kept you engaged. "Wow," she forced herself to say, keeping her tone deliberately light and breezy. "That's a lot to take in. I, um, I'm sure I'll need to think about it later, b--" She didn't even get to pivot before Doctor Hennessey interrupted.
"That's why you need to take a copy of my book," she cut in, gesturing to the pile of slim paperbacks sitting on the desk. "You should really come and grab one before you go. It's entirely free." It was also entirely in the opposite direction of the door Natalie was so tantalizingly close to, but there were limits to the amount of direct confrontation she was willing to force herself into with an authority figure, and throwing away a complimentary copy of 'Appreciating the Divine Cunt' as soon as she left the office seemed like a small price to pay to get out of here. Natalie forced herself to take the dozen steps forward to put her within arm's reach of the stack of books.
