The next week flew by rather quickly. During the day I was kept pretty busy at work- orders had come down from on high that we were to begin preparing for the next auction. That meant a lot of things had to be moved around, organized, and re-cataloged. Thankfully that order didn't include anything of
'questionable status'
- such as the prototype that was currently missing for obvious reasons. This meant I had a lot of relatively mindless time to think about the modifications I was making to the machine- both software and hardware.
Rachel helped me break up the monotony a bit with repeated lunch breaks. "All work and no play," She would whisper in my ear while her hand slipped into my jeans and wrapped around my cock. It seemed like all it took was the sound of her voice to get me hard lately. And she was always amped up and ready for anything I wanted. If only I had more time to take advantage of it.
"But I don't have to... I could always call and cancel- tell them no," She had complained Tuesday night. I had just recompiled all of the changes to the software and ran myself through a quick bit of training to make sure it was all working. It was time to celebrate! Only problem was, her agency had beaten me to the punch.
"No, no," I told her, trying to keep the disappointment out of my voice- and failing. "I can have you anytime I want. You still have to pay the bills just like I do."
"I could swing by after I'm done," She offered, her voice heavy with the promise of what else she would do once she arrived.
"No, it's alright. You have classes on Wednesday, and I have to work. We can't stay up all night every night or neither of us will be worth anything." I was just looking after both of us. It's not like I was trying to punish her for not being available twenty-four-seven at the drop of a hat. Or, if I was, at least I was punishing the both of us for it at the same time.
I couldn't even call Maggie and see if she wanted to hang out. She had made that abundantly clear when she had called me earlier the same day as I was getting off work.
"Please Benjamin," She had said almost immediately without giving me even an inch to work with edgewise. "Don't talk. Just listen, okay? I spoke with Rachel- and I think I understand what happened the other night. Don't get me wrong, I'm still a little mad, but Rachel helped me to see how it was all, well mostly, just a big misunderstanding. So much has changed so fast, I think we all just need to sit back and do some thinking about what we really want and how we want things to look like moving forward."
She finally took a breath long enough for me to get my foot in the door, so to speak. I tried to take advantage of it. "Look, Maggie. I think if you just-" And then my window closed again.
"Rachel already told me how you were worried for me. I appreciate all your help, Benjamin. I really do. With the play- with everything. But I think I have to do this on my own. I need to prove to myself I can do this. I already have all my lines from Act 3 memorized so you don't need to worry about that." Her tone shifted then, adding in just a pinch of reconciliation on top of her preventive justification. "I will give you an olive branch though. I get a few comp tickets to the dress rehearsal Thursday night. There's one at the door with your name on it. You'll come won't you?"
"Maggie, of course I'll-"
"Good. I'll talk to you after the show. Hopefully we'll all have done some thinking and calming down by then. I-"
There was a break there. A pause. So pregnant that I didn't have the courage to break it.
"I- what? I love you? I've changed my mind and want you to come fuck me right now? I don't think we can be friends anymore? I feel like some tofu? What, woman, what?!"
If she had called just a few hours later, after I had finished my self-training, maybe things would have been different.
But she hadn't waited- she had called when I was still wobbly, uncertain, and entirely susceptible to her particular form of kryptonite. So there I stood, silent- a paltry shadow to anyone deserving of the allusion to superman. I tried to console myself with the fact that, as far as I knew, even Superman hadn't told Lois how he really felt until fairly recently. In most continuities, anyway.
The moment passed. She never finished the thought. "See you then, Benjamin." Then she hung up.
I considered trying to call her back. Especially after I got the machine running. But in the end I decided that time was on my side. She had already given me an opening that Thursday night. I could use that without looking desperate and take the opportunity to remove whatever obstacle was keeping us apart.
Which was why I had called Rachel. That was what she was for, after all. But, having told her to be responsible and not skip out on work just to scratch my itch, I was left with precious few options on how to spend the rest of my evening.
Which just about brings me back to where I started. "I suppose you're right," Rachel's voice said over the phone. "Still disappointing though. I'd enjoy an evening with you a lot more than some stupid special performance at the opera."
"That's my Rachel," I said, trying to force a smile into my voice. "Such a
'cultured'
sex-slave."
"You know it, Master! Try to not have too much fun without me." She made a couple of kissing noises into the phone before we both hung up.
And that is how I ended up at a bar with Mike from work- talking about anything and everything I could think of
other
than my trouble with women. I couldn't exactly invite him over to my place given what was in the bedroom. Couldn't risk him recognizing it. To be honest, it was actually kind of a refreshing change of pace. Reminded me that if I was going to establish something resembling a normal life, with obvious points of exception of course, that I would need to cultivate a few regular friendships too. Or, at least as '
regular
' as my developing paranoia over the machine would allow- I had to have some protections in place. I wasn't sure if Mike was going to be one of those, but I had to start somewhere.
He took a sip of his beer as a preamble to what I thought was going to be a comment about the college football game we had sort of been watching. I had been keeping up so far- I wasn't really into sports but I could fake it well enough to pass the time. "So, were you serious about helping my sister with the LSAT?" He asked, bringing the illusion of normalcy crashing down around me.