"I heard you dumbasses needed a ride home!?!"
I closed my eyes in disbelief as I immediately knew who was picking us up. I nervously chuckled to myself as I felt like I just got caught with both of my hands in the cookie jar. I opened my eyes and turned around to face the proverbial music.
I was a little shocked to see that Laney was actually smiling at us from the front passenger's seat of the cobalt blue SUV that had pulled up. Even in my current foggy mental state, I recognized the SUV right away and craned my neck to look in and confirm that the voluptuous Anita was behind the wheel. Unlike Laney who was amused by the situation, Anita wasn't smiling and did not look too pleased to be playing chauffeur.
On the other hand, my brother was happily confused by the situation. Displaying his usual lack of subtlety, he was checking out the two hot MILFs in the SUV like a dog in heat. I watched as my brother acted like a real-life looney toon with his eyes about to pop out of his head and his tongue wagging. His head was on a swivel as he would take turns checking out the MILFs followed by shooting me a confused look on how I knew these two luscious ladies and then repeat. This went on for a few minutes while I started to talk to my favorite yummy mommies!
"Good morning ladies, we appreciate the ride."
I started to move towards the SUV but my feet felt like they were stuck in cement. On top of this, I was straining for air as if my chest was going to collapse on to my lungs from both exhaustion and starvation. For somebody in his mid-20's that semi-regularly works out, this sudden depletion of energy despite a couple hours of sleep was startling. I continued to push through until I got parallel to the front of the car and then placed my hands to my hips and took a few deep breaths out of necessity.
The look of disappointment and annoyance on Anita's face transformed into a look of concern as she looked me over. Even Laney's smile and trademark banter dissipated quickly as she now had a look of absolute shock written across her face.
Anita broke the momentary silence. "Johnny, are you alright? You don't look or sound so good!"
I started to speak but struggled as my voice came out a bit gravelly. "Yeah, just a little tired and hungry."
"Come on and get in the car, we'll take care of you!" Laney was now in full mother mode. Mikey grabbed my arm and guided me to the back seat of the SUV. If it wasn't for Mikey, I don't know if I would have been able to climb in on my own.
As Mikey jumped into the seat on the other side of the car, he was now the only one in the vehicle sporting a look of annoyance. Knowing my brother, he was pissed that we were getting a ride from two hot MILFs that now only had concern for his sex-drained brother. And I couldn't blame him one bit!
After Mikey introduced himself to the ladies, he turned to me. "Let's hit a 7/11 and get something in you. We need something to pull you back into the land of the living."
I nodded as I made eye contact with Anita via the rear-view mirror. Her eyes of concern worried me quite a bit. I've never ran a marathon but I'm pretty sure that this is how I would feel afterwards. Thankfully, I wasn't sore anywhere, just plain dead-tired. I placed my hand in my pocket and felt the breath-mint tin that was still in there. As I touched it, I could faintly hear the remaining two pink pills of persuasion moving around inside the tin. Damn it, these pink pills were the cause and effect of what was going on right now. The double-dosage of pills provided some new and unique persuasive abilities but it sure as hell took a toll on my body.
Should I have double-dosed on those pills last night? I closed my eyes and pictured the row of beautiful coed buns waiting for my raging boner from just a few hours ago. Yep, totally worth it!
I must have nodded off on these thoughts as I was awoken by a hard nudge to my shoulder from my brother. We were at the convenience store already as my door was open and Mikey was trying to shove a large can of Monster energy drink and a protein bar into my hands. I nodded at him in appreciation and weakly grabbed both.
Thankfully, my brother had popped the can open and started to remove the wrapper on the protein bar. Damn, I felt like a little kid that needed his Mom to cut his food for him. I took a bite of the protein bar and it tasted like cardboard covered in chocolate. I took a sip of the energy drink trying to put that awful tasting bar down. I repeated this for the next few minutes hoping that this would put some wind in my sails. Unfortunately, I was feeling absolutely no effect from the drink or protein bar, not that I expected to. I knew that the only way that I could recover from my current condition quickly is taking the last two pills that I had packed in that tin.
I contemplated over this for a few minutes. I truly didn't want to become dependent on these pills no matter how great the sexual benefits have been. I did take approximately 100 of these pills from David's hotel room so my fun with the pink pills of persuasion eventually would end and I didn't want to be a junkie for these things when it does. As I was drifting along in my thoughts, I glanced over at Mikey who looked like he was having the time of his life chatting with these hot cougars. I could tell that he was pretending not to notice me and hoping that I wouldn't screw up his chances with either Anita or Laney.
Oh hell, I really missed Anita and her giant cans! I dug deep into the energy reserves as I opened the tin, grabbed the pills and swallowed them with a sip of Monster. Within mere seconds, I felt a surge of energy ripple throughout my body along with the pink tint returning to my vision. Acting like Popeye after downing a can of spinach, my body quickly transitioned from a slouched down and out position to a body of a rejuvenated young man ready for some action. In the process, I completely startled everybody else in the car! That wasn't the only thing brought back to life as my boner was now back to its recently familiar raging form and desperately trying to get out of my slacks. I re-positioned myself and covered it as much as I could with my arm so that my brother wouldn't notice.