My Journal

I was supposed to start this journal months ago but I was busy with other things and going out with friends. I never really liked the online aspect of college but this semester that is what we are left with. Its too bad because I have to confess, I was really intrigued by some of the people we met in our Human Sexuality 103 class. Watching a woman put a condom on a banana with her mouth was educational but also kind of funny. The swingers were interesting just because there are so many facets to that lifestyle. I wish that we would have had more time to get to know those people when they visited the class. The quarantine kind of ruined that.

I've really been stressed out on many different levels since the quarantine first started. No movies, no going to the mall, literally nothing. Visiting friends from time to time has helped, and walks in the park have helped but it really hasn't been enough.

I guess it was obvious I was not completely okay with everything the way is was, and was having trouble keeping on track with my studies. The yoga and relaxation videos that we got as homework have really helped. I thought they were stupid at first but now that they are part of my routine I have to admit they really help with my mood and anxiety and I am finally getting back on track.

Another thing that I have to admit is helping is the dancing. I was starting to get out of shape since they closed the fitness center but dancing has been a great way to stay fit. I'm still not sure how much dancing will count towards my grade in the class but I really enjoy doing it. The music files the we all got are so relaxing, that they are almost hypnotic feeling. I had doubts about turning on my webcam and letting people watch me, but it actually feels nice listening to the music and letting people see me dance naked. I have to admit, I love reading the comments people write later about it.

Since I know that I've fallen behind in class I have really been thinking a lot about the extra assignments that have been mentioned. There are a lot of things that I either never heard of or really considered before the quarantine, but have to admit, I'm really starting to consider doing some of the extra assignments to get caught up.

Before the quarantine I would have been too afraid to go to someone's home and do a private dance for them. It actually kind of excites me now. Don't get me wrong, I'm still a little nervous about it, but its a chance to get out of my apartment and have some place to go. Of course I'm finding that I love listening to the music that I've downloaded from class and dancing to it. I won't lie, I also find the comments that people have written about my dancing kind of flattering.

One thing that really took me by surprise was finding out that we might get to go on dates for more credit towards our grade. Apparently if we do well enough dancing we can go on dates. Its crazy to think about, because before the quarantine dating was a lot different. Before, you met a guy and if he liked you he would ask you on a date, and if he liked you he would ask you on a date and if you liked him you would say yes. Now guys watch me dance on my webcam and if they like me I guess they ask for a date.

I guess I should be flattered by the number of guys who are requesting dates. I will miss going to nice places on a date, but with everything that is going on, I guess I am just flattered that guys would like to drop by for an in date. An in date is when a guy comes and visits me and we date in my apartment. An out date is when I go visit the guy where they live for the date.

I have a lot of catching up to do so I guess its a good thing that so many guys have requested dates and private dances. I've been pretty bored and actually a little lonely, not to mention a bit depressed since the quarantine started. The relaxation videos and music downloads have really taken the edge off. It will still be nice to start visiting other people. Its funny to think though, before the quarantine, I was only dating on weekends mostly. Now it looks like I will be dating more than I did before the quarantine.

It looks like I will be having some new experiences soon. I suppose that's what college is all about. I'm glad that I am finally moving forward again and I am looking forward to my next journal entry.