Man Of The House 33

Disclaimer: All parties involved are over the age of 18

I never knew my real father, He'd died before I'd been born and my stepfather Rick was in my life before I knew any difference. Mom lost a lot of goodwill moving on from Dad almost immediately to Rick, but she never took any judgment about it. "I needed a man to help me raise and provide for you girls, and I knew Rick was a good one." she'd say anytime we asked why she moved on so quickly.

By "You Girls" she meant me and my older sister Rosa, who did know our dad and wasn't any happier than his family when mom moved on with Rick, especially since Rick came with a son named Randy Jr. or RJ for short. Rj was a good kid, and while he didn't exactly understand the blending of the families, he accepted it quicker than us and tried to help us with it. I always looked up to RJ as my big brother, and though I had more love for my true sister in Rosa, we were always family.

But tragedy seems to follow us, and shortly after my 18th birthday my stepfather...or father as he truly felt to me...died due to a distracted driver. You'd think that would've been the only tragedy that happened that day, I mean, it's enough right? But no, another horrible event occurred on the day of my father's passing, my mother declared RJ the new "Man of the House ''. I'm sure it was meant to be a symbolic thing in her mind, asking him to take responsibility for helping us through this tough time, and maybe helping provide for the family given he'd graduated from trade school and started a pretty successful AC repair company that paid good money. But for some reason...it felt different. Ominous somehow.

RJ took it to heart almost immediately, organizing the funeral and taking over running the household, moving back in to be Mom's rock. Rosa was off at college and while she came home for the funeral, she left soon after citing that our small town just didn't fit her vibe. I was preparing to go off to college myself when the whole thing happened and threw my life into turmoil, but RJ got me into therapy and got me into online classes as well.

It could've felt like everything went back to normal, if it weren't for some...weirdness around the house. When RJ moved back in, mom insisted on a room shakeup. I would go to RJ's basement apartment where I'd have more privacy for schoolwork and such and they wouldn't wake me with them both coming and going for work all the time. I hesitated at first, asking if that was fair to RJ to give him my little pink bedroom on the second floor next to Mom and Rick's, but mom told me that in fact RJ would be taking over their old master suite and she'd be taking my room. When I pressed for why she said simply that she couldn't stand to be in her room anymore now having lost Rick.

After that I kinda retreated to the new basement lair I'd been awarded, but I'd still see weirdness from time to time. I heard glass breaking once and came running up the stairs to see if everything was alright. I found RJ supporting Mom against the kitchen counter with a broken cup on the floor, she looked out of it and was mumbling something. Rj assured me that she was just drunk and struggling with Rick's passing. He'd simply asked me to clean up the glass while he helped her to bed, but it was almost twenty minutes before he returned.

Another time I got into somewhat of a weird vibe while sitting watching TV with them, we were just watching some stupid new comic book movie and Mom cozied up to RJ. Not totally weird for a mother to cozy up to her son, but it was the way she did it that gave me the ick. She didn't do it like a mom would a son, she did it specifically like a woman would a guy she was interested in. She even placed his hand on her breasts when she wrapped his arm around her like a blanket. RJ for his part looked over at me and looked slightly uncomfortable, but didn't really move to correct her hand placement either. And I could swear when he thought I wasn't looking I saw him cop a feel! After the movie Rj claimed to be exhausted from work and headed up to his room, and when he left I swear I could see my mom's face fall.

"Mom, are you okay? Like...that was weird?" I asked as casually as I could. She seemed like I'd shaken her from a dream as she turned to look at me, fixing me with a stare for a moment before she spoke.

"Honey I spent five years in your fathers arms...and 18 in your stepfather's. I haven't been alone and unheld for a long time. Try not to judge me too harshly for leaning on my son a little." She said, before reaching over and grabbing the glass of wine on the table, standing and leaving the room curtly.

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It was a strange interaction, but I tried not to read too much into it. In truth she was right, I'd never seen my mom without a man in her life, and I didn't know what she was going through, only ever having had one or two short term boyfriends myself. So I tried to cut her some slack in the future when I saw them cuddling on the couch, or saw her give him a kiss on the cheek before leaving for work in the morning. I even turned a blind eye to the fact I could swear I heard her sneaking into his room one night when I came up for a midnight snack. I figured after sleeping with someone for so long maybe she was having trouble sleeping alone in her bed and just needed someone to hold her. Weird but not suspicious. But then came the night when I really started to get weirded out.

We'd just sat down for dinner, RJ looked exhausted after a long day and had only thrown on some basketball shorts and a loose Shirt after his shower. My Step-brother is a big guy, and while I don't recall ever seeing him work out he's constantly working outside on something around the house or garage, so he's pretty well built. The t-shirt was tight, and almost translucently wet. Not something I'd have noticed if Mom hadn't been eye-fucking him all of dinner. I mean seriously it was like watching her watch old Magnum P.I. reruns the was ogling him.

I tried to keep my eyes on my own plate but every time Rj said something Mom would respond with practically a moan an "uh huh" or "Sure" as a response. It was frankly more affectionate than she'd even been with Rick when he was alive and made me wanna vomit. It seemed like after a while Rj sensed my discomfort and asked about my classes for the week. I admitted I'd been struggling with my organic chem homework and he offered to help, though I could tell he wasn't super confident himself.

"Thanks big brother, but I don't think they covered organic chemistry in trade school. If you wouldn't mind, I would love to enroll in the online tutoring sessions. It'll be a like $100 for the whole semester...I'd use my own cash but I haven't worked in a few months since..." I trailed off. Rj sheepishly smiled and nodded his head, but Mom turned and affixed me with this glare. Like...Like I'd just slapped her or something.

"Rachel is that any way to speak to your brother? He is the man of this house, he's the one who puts the roof over our head and food in our stomachs. If we had to survive on my paycheck alone, we would have had to sell the house and move into some apartment. And you and your sister could forget about college!" She spat. I froze, never had my mother spoken to me like that before. Even when Rick was alive if we argued with him she'd usually calmly tell us to behave. It was my turn to look like I'd been slapped and I felt tears start to well in my eyes.

"Renee!" Rj Barked. I'd never heard him call her anything but Mom before...at least not that I could remember. It was jarring and shook both me and her from whatever spell we'd fallen under, eyes turning to the masculine and authoritative voice of my big brother. He'd always seemed big, but I'd never before noticed he'd become a man as well. "Rachel meant no disrespect, she was just being honest, and asking for help. I always want you girls to be able to come to me for help. I'm the man of the house now, and I want you all to feel like you can rely on me and come to me with anything you need. Without fear of judgment." He said.

What he was saying made sense, but his inflection was weird. It was like he was stressing certain words like some kind of secret code. Either way, mom apologized and looked sheepish and like a kicked puppy for the rest of dinner, not daring to meet Rj's eyes but still seemingly annoyed by me. I tried to hide my hurt but looked repeatedly to Rj for comfort, who met me with a genuine friendly smile when he noticed me looking.

After that event, I texted my sister about the whole situation and how weird I found it. She seemed sympathetic but unwilling to do anything until I mentioned Mom possibly sleeping in Rj's room. Rosa freaked out and asked when this all started, demanding an account of every time mom had seemed weird or dazed. When she asked about that, I started to realize that since a couple months after the funeral, mom had always either had this dazed look about her like she was stoned, or she was fawning over Rj in some way.

When I told Rosa that she told me that mom was probably back doing pills like she had when Dad had died, and that she was probably just latching on to the nearest man the way she did with Randy when Dad had died. It turned out Dad and Randy had been good friends and coworkers before he passed, and after Dad died Randy had come around often to drop off meals or help babysit while mom job hunted. She described mom as "pathetic" acting like a lovesick puppy over a man when dad was barely cold in the ground. It hurt to hear, but it was true. Mom latched onto Rj as her new "Man" Almost immediately, and while my good natured brother seemed to be interpreting this as the dutiful son, mom seemed grossly interested in taking it further. Maybe with the pills she wasn't thinking right. I resolved to talk to Rj, and told Rosa as much.

"No, me and Rj need to have a conversation about this. Try to ignore it till I can get back this weekend." She replied sternly, offering no chance to rebuttal.

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Rosa was true to her word and returned home the following weekend to speak to Rj about Mom. She took up residence in her old room down the hall from mine. This of course put her on the same floor as Rj and Mom. While Rj seemed totally fine with this, Mom seemed outright hostile to the idea, only cementing what Rosa and I already suspected.

Rosa privately asked Rj for a talk her first night at dinner, asking if they could go out to the reservoir where Randy used to take us to fish and talk about some heavy family matters. Rj seemed concerned but agreed immediately, and asked me and mom to take care of the dishes. They left as soon as food was done, and Mom seemed somewhat more at peace with Rosa gone.

We went to the kitchen and set to our task, mom cleaning food and putting things away into tupperware while I rinsed plates and loaded the dishwasher. "Your sister...I don't know what to do with her" Mom muttered as she scooped enchiladas into a container from the pan on the stove. Their family was fourth generation and had long ago assimilated to America, but they still loved to trot out Abuela's recipes for special occasions..

"What do you mean, she's just home for the weekend mom?" I asked, trying to act as casually as I could.

"I mean she's separating herself from the family. Leaving us behind when we need her most. I remember when your father passed, she was glued to my hip. Every other word was 'Mama'. Then when I married Randy it was like I lost a daughter. What was I supposed to do? Be a single mother of two girls with no family support? Oh they love to say they'd have supported us, but when my car broke down not a single person picked up but Randy. When I asked them to watch you girls so I could go back to work, nobody volunteered but Randy. It took years to break down the walls she built when Randy and Rj came into our lives. And now she's thrown them back up...at least towards me. My only hope is that this visit means she's at least still open to Rj." She muttered, sounding solemn and heartbroken.

Honestly if I hadn't been suspicious of her, I'd have believed her. In truth it did feel like Rosa had abandoned us following Randy's death, and it made sense that Mom would be somewhat panicked about losing her. But knowing what I knew of her from both how she acted and how she'd been behaving around Rj, it all just sounded like projection. "Hopefully she'll talk to me when she gets home, and I can talk some sense into her" She mumbled absentmindedly.

It was a couple of hours before Rj and Rosa returned home, when they did they came in laughing and smiling like they were the best of friends again. Mom and I had stayed up watching Grey's Anatomy reruns in the living room waiting for them. Mom hopped up off the couch when they arrived like an excited puppy, making my stomach knot with discomfort, but Rosa seemed to hardly notice now. As I climbed off the couch and approached myself I recognized the unmistakable smell of weed on my older siblings. Mom apparently did too and snorted "Well Cheech and Chong I see you two've mended bridges. I'm glad. '' She smiled. Rosa regarded her with some discomfort, but still smiled at her and nodded.

"We had a good talk...speaking of Rj said you'd been wanting to talk to me too. I don't think I'm good to drive but I wouldn't mind going up to my room and talking if you don't care?" She smiled. Mom nodded with a soft smile of her own, and they set off up the stairs. Rj for his part snorted and went to grab a beer and some chips from the cupboard.

"You want one Gatita?" He asked, using my childhood nickname only he and Rosa had ever called me. I despised the name, considering it had evolved from "Fraidy Cat" when I was younger, but chose not to engage with the trademark older sibling bullying.

"Nah, but I'll steal some of your chips" I called. He joined me in the living room and sat down, flipping the TV over to some wildlife documentary. We ate chips in silence for a bit before I mustered up the courage to speak.

"So what did you and Rosa talk about?" I asked casually, before stuffing a chip in my mouth. He sighed and ran his hand through his hair, rubbing the back of his neck.

"She wants to come home, She's worried about how mom's handling Dad's passing and thinks it's best if she moves home to stay with us for a while after her school ends here next month. And I agree. Mom's been leaning on me a lot lately and while I don't mind...it's getting a little weird right?" He asked casually. I couldn't help my snort of relief when he said it, meaning at least he had acknowledged the weirdness we'd been going through.

"Yes! Finally thank god! She's been hanging off you like some lovesick teenager! I'm glad you noticed. Makes me feel like I'm not going crazy" I laughed. He smiled and nodded, but his face kinda shifted and he shook his head. He popped a few more chips and took a sip of his beer before he said

"She's been...weird. She's asked to sleep in my bed a number of nights, saying she couldn't sleep alone. And when you're not around she's practically clinging to me. I'm glad you've noticed it too. Plus that blowup at dinner the other night? I think she's taking this whole 'Man of the House' thing a little too seriously." He muttered, seeming distracted. I nodded and laid my hand on his arm comfortingly, trying to express some connection and support. He didn't shy away but he flinched, causing me some concern. I puzzled for a moment about why my brother would shy from my touch, but pushed the worry down since it was likely a result of my mother's recent acts.

"Maybe, but we do appreciate everything you've done stepping in for Dad. Mom may be going nuts but she was right that without you doing what you've had to, we never would've been able to keep living like we have '' He seemed to have mostly dissociated into the show he was watching but sighed and wrapped an arm around me, pulling me into a hug. We watched in silence for a bit, munching chips and just enjoying each other's company.

I kinda expected Rosa to return, but after an hour or so it seemed like she wouldn't so I got up to head for bed. "Renee, I appreciate your concern, and reaching out to Rosa like you did. But I wish you'd talked to me first. Not that I mind her getting involved, I could use the help. But...I thought you trusted me more than that '' He muttered, not looking away from the Tv. I didn't have a response, though I struggled for a moment to find it, nothing came.

I had no reason I didn't trust my brother enough to ask him what was going on or tell him about my concerns. He'd been nothing but kind to me, and even defended me when my mother snapped. He was right to be somewhat offended, but I couldn't shake the feeling I'd made the right call. Rather than offer an insincere apology I simply left. Heading down to the small apartment I convinced myself that whatever was going on, it would all be okay soon enough.

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A month later Rosa moved home and moved back into her old room upstairs. While I enjoyed having her home at first, I'll admit it felt isolating being the odd one out in the basement. Rosa got a job at a local clinic with her degree, and somehow her and Rj convinced mom to get into therapy online.

It seemed like everything was moving forward and returning to somewhat normalcy around the house, and yet I just couldn't shake the feeling that something was off. I tried and tried to convince myself it was just Randy's absence that made me feel weird, that was my therapist's opinion as well. I tried to normalize my routine and hoped that normalcy would come with it, but it never did.

Mom was still absolutely doting on Rj, making sure he had anything he needed and clinging to his side. Only now she had Rosa around to call her out when she was doing too much, and while it wasn't foolproof it seemed to mitigate some of her weirdness. The new weirdness was Rosa herself. While she and Rj had always been cordial they now seemed like the best of friends. Hanging out, going out for drinks, and watching TV together often when Rj was home. I slotted myself into their hangouts the best I could, but somehow felt like a third wheel even amongst my siblings.

Rj and I had always been closer despite him being Rosa's age, so it felt almost as if I was being pushed to the side by my own sister. Which in turn felt weird, and felt like I was competing with my sister and mother for Rj's attention, which felt gross and unsettling. I brought these feelings up to Rosa and she seemed more annoyed than anything.

"Rachel, there are like five people in this town I can stand and I dated two of them. Rj and I aren't trying to exclude you, but unlike you I don't really have friends around here anymore so I kinda gotta hang out with him. Don't lump me in with mom" she'd snapped.

I apologized at the time, but the weird feeling continued. It all came to a head on Rj's birthday. I asked Mom and Rosa what they were getting him in advance and they refused to tell me, smiling knowingly at each other. The whole thing felt a little too Invasion of the Bodysnatchers too me so I resolved to plan for his birthday on my own. I got him a new hat for work, a couple six packs of his favorite beer, and resolved to sit down and actually watch one of those cheesy seventies spoof comedies he loved so much with him.

The night before his birthday however Mom and Rosa sent him out with some friends to hangout and insisted on the three of us staying home for the night and having a "girls night" to pretty ourselves up for the next day. I found the whole thing weird, but agreed since it seemed to make Rj happy.