One of my favorite stupid movies is Leprechaun in the Hood and I love the ending rap where he enslaves the three strippers with magic. While that theme is fun, this one is about a person who thinks they have gotten very lucky, get three wishes, get what they wished for, but not exactly what they wished for. If you want to use anything please ask first.
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CHAPTER 1
OUT IN THE IRISH COUNTRYSIDE
Sally sighed as she slowly walked up along the stone fence. The day was not too overcast, and it was just warm enough for a light sweater. She was enjoying her vacation in Ireland greatly. She had taken a tour and had booked a nice country room an hour outside of Dublin in a nice little village so she could just have some alone time. The locals were friendly enough and the pub served great beer so life was good.
As she had left for her morning walk one of the constables had warned her about staying on the paths. "Nothing dangerous really, but we have some poachers in the area. They have put out some traps that can break an ankle easily so don't go walking where others haven't been."
Sally was a young woman with reddish hair, a bit pudgy, but still very cute. She wasn't in bad shape but she knew she didn't get the looks like the bleach blondes did back in college. She was actually taking this break prior to starting her job in Denver and she was glad to be getting into the real world.
She followed the path and was soon out of sight of the town. After a bit, she came to a fork. Usually she went left up along the ridge and got an amazing view of the valley. The right side led down towards some swampy over grown area and the trail was very faint and obviously unused. For some reason she decided to try the right.
"Just for a bit anyway. I can always turn around." She said out loud to no one in particular as she moved out.
The path didn't get any better, and she soon found herself in a very boggy area with a lot of stunted trees. She was just about to turn around when she heard a very faint noise.
"That sounded like someone calling for help. HEY THERE!" She shouted back.
"Lassie! Please help me! I'ma caught in a trap!" a very odd sounding voice replied.
"Ok! Where are you?"
"Up the path a bit lass! Of to yer right!"
Sally moved up and came around a slight bend and then stopped dead.
There was a no shit leprechaun caught in a trap.
Sally blinked and then blinked again. She was sure she was losing it but there was a real fucking leprechaun caught in a trap. Little guy, green clothes and hat, red beard, the whole nine yards. And the little guy was floundering in the muck.
Sally shook her head and then reached over to grab his hand. The little man grasped it and she pulled.
The leprechaun winced and said. "Me leg, lass. It do be caught! Please free it or it twill drag me under!"
Sally looked about and realizing she was all alone, sighed and carefully stepped down into the bog. She held on to a tree branch and was able to grab the trap's stake and after several tugs work it free. She pulled the trap and the little man with it out of the bog.
After extracting herself she reached down and pulled open the trap's jaws and the leprechaun pulled his broken leg out.
Sally flinched at the wound. "I'm sorry but I don't think I can help you with that. I can carry you to the village and..."
"Nay lass, this is not a thing!"
POOF!!
The little man waved his cane and his leg healed instantly. He sighed and stood and looked down at himself.
"Oh dear, my suit do be quite the sight! Best clean meself up."
POOF!!
Another wave of his cane and he looked like he had just put on a clean suit.
The little man nodded and then tipped his hat to Sally. "Ah lass! Thank ye for the help. I couldn't work me magic while keeping me head up above that Devil bog! The poor bastard who laid that trap will be having a spot of bad luck sure as the sun rises in the morning though!"
"Uh, sure? Wow, this is amazing. I have to say I'd never thought I would end up seeing a real Leprechaun on this trip. Do you have a name?"
"I do, but it not be important Lass. For saving me life I will grant thee three wishes. Now, don't be getting greedy and trying to trick me outta more. Three be a fair price for a live I do think."
Sally blinked again. "Wow, three wishes? Just like a genie. I'd better think this through."
Sally started to open her mouth when she heard a faint voice coming up the path from the other direction.
The Leprechaun looked back and his face darkened. "The dark hearted lout who set this trap! I will settle him! But first, make ye wishes Lass! I will not wait, make them now or lose them!"
"Now? I need time, I, oh crap! Okay, uh, I wish I knew how to be successful. Be able to make money, get a house, and do well at a profession, that kind of thing. I wish I was prettier than I am now, I know I'm cute, but I want to be someone who turns heads. And I want to be able to help others make their lives better."
The Leprechaun smiled and waved his cane. "Those be goodly wishes my lovely Lass! I will grant them and you shall enjoy them for the rest of your days! Although, ye should be wary of a leprechaun's gift, we are a tricky bunch!"
POOF!!
Sally coughed and waved her hands. She was engulfed in smoke and when it cleared the little Leprechaun was gone. She looked around and saw no one else. Remembering that the poachers were approaching from the other way she quickly returned the way she came.
Sally headed back to the village and walked into her room at the inn. She was tired from her walk and today was the last day of her trip. She started to pack but felt so tired she finally lay down and fell asleep. She had a vivid dream about a stunning golden haired blonde with an hourglass figure, perfect measurements and skin, Sapphire Blue eyes, and a face that men would die for.
In her dream she looked in her mirror and said "Is that me?"
"Aye Lass, it do be the new you."