"She's what?"
"She's one of the 13. You know: the 13 women you have to save."
I was suddenly glad that I was sitting down; my knees wobbled. Oh my God. The list. All this time it had been nothing more than a concept to me, a remote, distant idea - like a kid in Grade 1 being told which high school they would eventually go to.
Sophie was on the list?
"We narrowly avoided a disaster, Pete." said Lillian.
"What kind of disaster?"
"Well ... the kind doesn't matter. That's not what's important. But it's absolutely vital that you not keep secrets from us. Do you understand?"
I didn't. "Well ... it's just that ..."
"Just what?" said Lillian. "No more secrets."
"Sorry. It's just that Janine ... well, generally she hasn't liked me having a girlfriend. She didn't like Michelle, or Danielle. And Danielle didn't like her. I still don't know what happened, but ... I didn't want to cause any trouble."
Lillian shot her daughter a look. Janine rolled her eyes, but then her expression changed. She knelt on the floor in front of the couch and put a hand on my knee.
"Pete, I only want what's best for you. You're going to save my life - mine and 12 other women's."
"We're a team." said Lillian. "No more secrets. No more surprises. Okay, Pete?"
Sophie was one of the 13?
"Okay." I said.
"Good." said Lillian. "So - tell us about your girlfriend ... how did you meet?"
I did most of the talking for the next half hour. Lillian and Janine wanted to know
everything
.
I didn't have any problems with telling them about the pool party. But I was reluctant to talk about our first real date - the 12 hour marathon that took us to High Park, after Dim Sum, and before drinks and dinner. For some reason, that felt private - something that belonged to Sophie and me alone. I was
not
going to describe our first kiss.
There didn't seem to be anything wrong with telling them the basic facts: that Sophie had an exciting new job as a lab technician, and that she was committed to living in Montreal for the near future ... that her father was there, while her mother lived here.
"You've ... been intimate?" said Lillian.
"Yes." I wasn't about to go into detail, but there didn't seem to be any reason not to admit it. 'No secrets' wasn't quite the same as revealing that Sophie was the most exciting, most wonderful woman I'd ever met.
"How was she?" asked Janine.
I just blushed. There was no right way to answer that question.
Janine had been the star - no, let's be honest - the center of the entire firmament of my fantasies and sexual experience from the moment I turned 18, when she knocked on my door. She'd been my obsession, the focus of my constant lust.
I'd wanted to please her, to impress her, to earn even the slightest nod of approval.
Sophie, though ... I wanted to please her, but also to comfort and protect her - most of all, to see her smile (ideally, because of something I'd done). There was lust, too. But if I was going to be totally honest, she gave me a warm feeling, which I wanted to return in full measure.
"Janine." said Lillian. That was the closest to a reprimand I'd ever heard between Lillian and her daughter.
Something told me, though, that it was dangerous to leave this question hanging there unanswered. I looked at Janine, and then lowered my eyes.
"It's, ah ... it's good. I mean, there's nobody like you ... but ... yeah - it's good."
Janine smiled. That was all she wanted to know. Her throne was secure.
* * * * *
We did a short U.S. tour: Detroit and Toledo (Ohio), Gary (Indiana) and Chicago, Milwaukee and Madison, Minneapolis and Duluth. The venues were mostly small, and I wasn't sure that we were making all that much money, but Janine assured me that it was a good idea.
On the brighter side, she wasn't bothering me to go out with groupies. Meanwhile, Sammy and I were both missing our girlfriends, so we were able to commiserate with each other. I just couldn't tell Sammy that Sophie was on the list - or mention the list at all.
"Did you ever think that we'd be in Duluth, Minnesota together?" I asked him. "Or Gary, Indiana?"
"I didn't know there
was
a Gary Indiana."
"C'mon, Sammy. It's just down the road from South Bend. Notre Dame."
"Yeah, yeah. But we're not here for college football."
He was right about that. Janine and I were trying out new material, new approaches. We'd been invited for a second appearance on Penn and Teller - we needed another crowd-pleasing routine.
But we were back in Toronto at the beginning of October, which left me free to join Sophie and her mother for Thanksgiving. She must have been watching for my car, because she immediately came out to greet me with a kiss and a big hug.
"You're so beautiful." I told her. "Even more beautiful than I remembered."
"I missed you, too." she said.
It was so strange: Sophie was so real, so warm and alive, in my arms. But in the back of my mind was the utterly bizarre realization that I had to save her from being raped, impregnated and murdered by my own father - and that to do so, I had to impregnate her myself. It just didn't make sense.
The future was too strange, too daunting. I took refuge in the immediate present.
"Any last-minute instructions for dealing with your Mother?"
"She's a little uptight." Sophie warned me. "And her partner is ... difficult. But Mom will like you. And my Aunt Anna is pretty cool. She'll like you, too."
"As long as
you
like me." I said.
Sophie smiled at me - her classic smile, which showed no teeth, but revealed every one of the dozen best dimples on her face. Then she kissed me again.
"You'll be fine."
Sophie hadn't gotten her looks - or her personality - from her mother. Her Mom was ... brittle, for lack of a better word. A fragile personality, in need of constant support and reassurance.
Her Mom's boyfriend introduced himself as 'Sophie's stepdad', while trying to crush my fingers. He was just ... creepy. Patronizing
and
creepy.
Aunt Anna, on the other hand, was a treat.
"So pleased to meet you, Pete. Sophie talks about you all the time. I saw the video of the night you met - that pool party. Then I had to go back and watch your appearance on Penn and Teller. Wow! What a great show!"
Aunt Anna was Sophie's Mom's sister, but she looked more like Sophie: dark hair, dimples, and cleavage.
"That's very kind of you to say, Aunt Anna." I said. "I'm very pleased to meet you, too. Sophie didn't provide a lot of details, but I know that she's very fond of you - and that you've been very important in her life."
Aunt Anna smiled, showing her own collection of dimples. "I've tried to keep in touch with her. It hasn't always been easy. My sister doesn't always approve of my ... lifestyle."
"Oh?" Sophie hadn't told me anything about a split between her mother and her aunt.
"Sophie didn't tell you?"
"Umm ... no."
"Let's just say that while my sister went to university for her MRS, I got myself a job."
"MRS? I'm sorry - what type of degree is that?"
Aunt Anna grinned. "It's not. MRS - Mrs. She went to university to meet her future husband. She succeeded. She got married. They had Sophie - the only bright spot of that unholy union - then they divorced."
"Here's a tip for you: if Sophie ever wants to introduce you to her father, just say that you're busy. Or sick."
Family drama. The odd thing, though, was that Sophie loved her Aunt. Anna had been there for her throughout her childhood and teen years. I wasn't at all impressed by Sophie's Mom - and her stepdad was repulsive. Aunt Anna seemed like the sane one of the family.
"What type of job did you get?" I asked.
"I answered the phone at a rape crisis centre." she said. "Then I gravitated to suicide prevention."
