I'd had a great summer. Practicing with Lillian and training with Janine was better by far than schlepping away at some minimum-wage job, or sitting in a classroom. The only fly in the ointment, I suppose, was that I hadn't spent much time with my Mom and Bill.
September arrived, and I had to sign up for college. I took Bill's advice (and Janine's), and signed up for Business Studies.
"It'll give you lots of career options." said Bill. "It worked out great for me."
"It's the easiest program." said Janine. "You barely need a brain to pass it."
The truth might have lain somewhere between those two points of view. Or maybe they were both right. It didn't really matter what I took, though. I wasn't going to be there much.
I went to the first classes. Once I had a copy of the syllabus, and the due dates of the assignments, I was good to go. And go I did. I rarely went back - except for mid-terms and final exams.
Missing minor assignments and surprise quizzes would cut down my marks, but I wasn't aiming for summa cum laude. I cheated on the tests, while Janine found classmates of mine who would share their work on important projects and assignment because she flirted with them. Feminine wiles - and just a little magic - ensured that I never had to worry about school.
Sammy didn't approve. I think that part of his annoyance was based on the fact that I was never on campus. I didn't hang out with him during the day (when I was with Lillian), or at night (when I was with Janine). I tried to squeeze my best friend in on Saturdays or Sundays, or on weeknights when Janine cancelled on me.
He could see the difference, and he didn't care for it. But he also came down on me for ditching classes.
"Pete - this is whacked. You
paid
for these classes - and you never go?"
There was a little part of me, like a voice in the back of my head, that agreed with him. But I just couldn't explain to Sammy that I was going to be rich and famous
without
school. I was also trying hard to keep up with Janine - like on the night that she welcomed me to her apartment wearing only earrings and a bracelet...
I knew that my thinking was off. But it was in a good cause, right? The long-term goal justified the short-term expedients. Or something like that.
I did feel bad when I occasionally reached out and read my Mom's mind. She and Bill were back on track, so to speak. But she worried about me. She never saw me doing homework, or studying.
Some nights I didn't come home at all, because Janine had challenged me to ring her bells, or because I was too exhausted to find my way home. I was so totally, so crazily into her...
Janine didn't just continue my multi-faceted training. She also found me a couple of gigs for my magic show. I was still a work in progress, but she thought I should gain some experience.
She got me a booking at a small dinner theatre, as a warm-up act, and then at a frat party at the University.
"Remember," she said, "don't call them tricks. Say they're 'illusions', if you have to. Better yet, don't call them anything - just do them."
I didn't 'kill' at the dinner theatre. I was still finding my footing, so my routine stuttered a bit (like someone learning to drive with a clutch for the first time). Still, it had to qualify as a partial success. People gasped when I correctly identified the cards my volunteers had chosen.
One woman double-clutched - that is, she chose a card, and then changed her mind halfway through my act. I nearly blew her mind when I correctly identified both cards - in the correct order.
The university gig, on the other hand, nearly killed
me
. Those students didn't want to see a magic show; they were there to get wasted. Absolutely shit-faced. The clever drunks constantly interrupted my routine, trying to be funny. The asshole drunks tried to throw me off, just to be dicks.
The combination made it virtually impossible for me to work. I got out of there alive - that's about the only positive thing I can say about
that
experience.
It was only afterwards that I remembered something that I should have never forgotten.
I'd read a bit about Penn and Teller, the famous magician/comedian duo. Penn Jillette did
all
of the talking - a task he was supremely well-equipped for. Teller almost never spoke. It was their shtick - part of their routines.
The reason why Teller never spoke, apparently, was because he'd done shows for college crowds. He realized that they were less likely to heckle, or to throw beer
if he never spoke a word.
The smart asses had nothing to comment about, to play off. They were just more attentive to his show.
Shin Lim never spoke, either. He was born in Singapore, of Chinese parents. But he was raised in Canada, and never learned to speak Chinese. When he toured China, he had no choice but
not
to speak. It became part of his routine.
Penn and Teller were funny; Shin Lim made silly card tricks look ultra-serious - like high art (plus he was really cool). I was neither funny, nor cool.
But I could do something neither of those guys could: real magic. All I needed was an appealing routine to go with it.
"Maybe I shouldn't talk." I suggested, to Lillian and Janine.
"What are you talking about?" snapped Janine. "You have to talk!"
"I know. I have to speak
sometimes.
But what if I had a partner? They could do most of the setup. You know - the patter."
"Like who? Your friend Sammy?"
That wasn't a terrible idea. But I already had someone in mind; someone more photogenic, and more appealing by far.
"No, Janine. I was thinking of... you."
"What?"
"
That's a brilliant idea
." said Lillian. "Janine can do sleight of hand and PK when the focus is on you. You provide the distraction... Janine, can't you see it? They'll never suspect that it's you. And you can set up the mentalist bits - they'll think that
you're
the distraction, when he actually doesn't need any. It's brilliant!"
Janine came around to seeing the advantages. She would certainly enjoy being the center of attention.
"Pete still needs a persona." she said.
We ended up talking about what I wasn't: cool. Clever. Witty. Good-looking. Suave.
"Maybe we should concentrate on what Pete
is
." said Lillian.
Silence.
"Klutzy?" I suggested.