*From the Ruler's blog, entry 1:*
Look, at the end of the day, I try to be a good person. I was given a very good hand, and what am I supposed to do, not play it? So yes, when a year ago I woke up and found out that everyone had to obey any of my orders, I used it for my personal gain. And yes, at the start, I may have gone too far, lots of sex was had (and yes, there will be plenty of that here too), some people got hurt, and learned some valuable lessons about unintended consequences. Let me tell you, those first months were madness. Turns out you can't simply create unbreakable laws for 8 billion people without having entire economies collapse. I am very sorry if anyone from New Zealand is reading this, the economy should get back to where it was in a couple of months. So I did found the council, who basically are a bunch of very clever people that try to guide me through making the world a better place without messing up everyone's lives. As I said, I try to be a good person. We will beat climate change in a couple of decades thanks to me. So sue me for wanting to have sex with anyone I can! You know, you can actually sue me, the council thought it was a good avenue for regular people to raise their voices in case I am fucking up.
Oh right, I never explained what this is. I guess I am bored, and the girl currently sucking my dick just asked me what happens when I die. And honestly, no fucking clue. So in the odd case, the spell or whatever this is gets undone and people hate my guts, this can serve as a firsthand account of any of my changes. There are so many little changes I did that I keep forgetting about, so it will be good to have them written somewhere. And yes, this is a blog, I always thought those were cool. More people should have blogs nowadays.
I'll also try to fix any of my old messes. Some weird disease was hitting a Chinese city a few months ago, and the council heavily advised me to put everyone there in lockdown for a few days. So if you ever wondered why you couldn't leave your house for half a month, there's the answer. I thought not telling people about it would be funny. I feel a bit bad about it, so as a recompense, anyone that had to lock down can have one Blowjob Pass. Just tell anyone you were in, eh... what was it?... Wuhan? And they will drop to their knees. You only get one, so choose well! And if you are chosen, make sure it's a good one.
The nerds tell me I may have saved millions of people doing this, so like I am a fucking hero. As I said, I am a good person.
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Sarah was tired. Her sister Mary had decided to make her the Maid of Honor for her wedding. She loved Mary to death, but after a full day of going up and down the city with her for wedding preparations, she sorta wished her fiancé would banish and make this hell go. Mary had always been a bit brat-ish, but this wedding had turned her into a full-on bridezilla. Sarah had to apologize to three different vendors, and that was just for today!
"Look, Sarah, it's not my fault the dude was an asshole, how dare he say that they couldn't do orchids?" Mary kept babbling excuses. "And who in their right mind would put a tree right next to the parking spot? I am so gonna sue him. Better, I'm going to get Robert to kick his ass"
In reality, Mary had been so blinded with rage that she had hit the tree right after turning the car on. From the brief conversation Sarah had with the owner of the flower shop, it looked more likely that if anyone was going to be sued, it would be Mary. Although he seemed like a nice guy who wanted to interact with Mary even less than Sarah. At this point she was fully checked out, and was just sitting next to Mary on the last bus of the day, hoping she could get home to her girlfriend as soon as possible. She could at least make a good blog entry out of this. Weird how suddenly tons of people, including Sarah, decided to start a blog.
"Dude, read, it's clear what it says, it's anyone!" Sarah overheard the two guys in the back talking. They looked to be 20ish, wearing anime T-shirts, and probably already had a few drinks.
"I can't believe this, we were just there on holiday when it happened..." replied the other. He seemed more shy.
"I was trapped in some Chinese hotel room with you for weeks with no idea why, I didn't even want to go to China in the first place! This is the Ruler finally rewarding us" Sarah started paying attention. People usually tend to not mention the Ruler casually, best not to think about what one cannot change. "This is karma paying back"
"I don't know man... Who would you even pick?"
