**This is part of a story about a woman and her journey to find her submissive side, IF she has one hiding under her dominant personality. --RouX
I have known that it would come to this I just never knew it would take this long. So many months of talking and texting, swapping fantasies and histories, learning needs and wants; I already feel like I know just how to please you. We have met for lunches, seen each other at parties, had a few bar side rendezvous. We have had a few passionate embraces with heavy, needy kissing and roving hands seeking and searching in the dark corners of parking lots, only to split away to our respectable lives. Back to our individual lives, lives that lack lust and passion, lives that have led us back to each other, years after our days of flirting and fucking in the back of a van in the dark corners of parking lots.
One of the things that you have learned in our months of swapping fantasies and histories is my need to submit to being controlled. I do not want to be in charge, I want someone else to take the reins and lead the way. I want to submit to firm hands and a guiding voice. You know this and have let this drag out longer, than I think it was necessary. It has not been so long just due to scheduling around and evading detection by our other halves.
You have also used this time to control me, amped the anticipation and tightened the tension of my libido. I have seen the sparkle of devilish delight in your eyes when we have seen each other at parties. Having to brush past you, make small talk with you like innocent friends, and avoid looking at you too long and too hard, drives me to pure maddening distraction. I can't say what I really want and I can't reach out and touch you the way I so desperately want to and you know these things. You recognize my flush of desire and frustration. Your eyes say you know, you understand, you want it too, and you will give me what I desire. Just be patient!
But that is in the past we are here, finally, meeting in a darkened, cool hotel room on a blazing hot summers day. Hiding from the summer heat and our fulltime lives, alone in this dim room we can, at long last, face the internal blaze we have stoked in each other.
I arrived before you, as you told me I would. It has been an hour since I checked in and it has been the worst hour of anticipation! I am wound up tighter than a drum, the storm of butterflies in my stomach has given me an all over jitter, my skin feels like it could crawl right off me, and I could just about float off the floor on my sexual high. I have spent most of the hour flitting about the room. I have tried to check my email, peruse Facebook and Pinterest but I just cannot sit still and my attention span it shot. AND I absolutely stayed away from Literotica, even though I really wanted to see if my submitted story had been posted yet. But I know I really could not handle any more arousal without breaking my promise to not touch myself.
It's been a week since we made the plans and one of the rules I had follow was not to masturbate. I made it this far and it was not easy, I was not going to lose it mere minutes before your arrival and possibly jeopardize the consummation of this long, drawn out game of foreplay. You warned me I would be punished if I did not behave, you said you would know if I had, you said you would be so disappointed in me, and I would be oh so very sorry if I did not abstain.
You should be here any minute. I have dimmed the lights and taken to laying flat on my back in the middle of the bed just staring at the ceiling trying not to think about you, about us. I am just focusing on breathing slowly and the cool air blowing across me from the AC unit. Hoping to slow my heart down to a mere gallop and relax the tightness that has pervaded my whole body.