Do you know that feeling of being at home, only better? I'm right there now. A glass of fine wine, my feet on the carpeted floor, a slave determinedly conditioning herself, it is the perfect time for some writing while I wait for last week's videos to finish encoding.
The Path of Least Resistance:
Paula is on all fours, her ankles cuffed, with a vibrator at maximum power in her pussy and an anal plug firmly embedded between her two beautiful buttocks, both red from the irrepressible slaps I gave her when she arrived, and her breasts hang freely with nipple clamps attached. None of this bothers the freckled beauty, who has all her attention focused on holding a blue pen with her lips, teeth and tongue.
All the stress being applied to her body forces her psyche down the path of least resistance: to obey, submit, and lose all desire to exercise free will, because freedom implies pain and submission pleasure. The transcription of her orders plunges her more and more deeply into trance, until the orders are impregnated in the deepest parts of her mind, sculpting her consciousness without consent.
"I am Paula Castillo externally, I am a stupid slave internally. I am a faithful wife externally, I am a cheap whore internally. I own my thoughts externally, the master owns my body and mind internally, and this is my real self, a sex toy completely subject to the whims of the master. I don't think, just obey, obey, obey ..."
She writes slowly, detailing each letter as it melts into her being, into the muscle memory of her jaw and mouth.
It's a good time to mention the 'therapeutic clinic' I had two years ago, where I practiced with great care what I learned as an amateur in the field of hypnosis and formalized my skills. I did not have certifications to support me as a mental health specialist, and if I'm being honest I did not seek to become a therapist, I just wanted to fulfill those fantasies I longed for since adolescence.
Searching for an acceptable place, through personal contacts and mental tricks I wound up on the third floor, outside, at the reception would be Kassia, a twenty-year-old Polish girl, arrived from exchange by the university, we worked three therapies of an hour and a half to two, from Monday to Friday.
I fixed my lack of credentials with some editing, foreign universities, and elegant wooden frames. At first, older people arrived, or people in their thirties with severe existential problems. My dream seemed to have become a monotonous irony, but I could at least feel satisfied that most patients felt 'enthusiastic and renewed' after a few therapies.
In retrospect those three months of tedium gave me invaluable experience that I am thankful for today. At the time though, with my illusions punctured and deflated, I thought about closing the place.
The Asian Girl:
Oval face, long, straight black hair, fine nose, pink lips. I looked at her in surprise. I could not believe it, at last!
Here I will call her Hye. Her real name is more common, but I prefer Hye. Her biological parents were or are Korean and she inherited the characteristic features, thus my astonishment when she spoke with such a clear and recognizable accent; she is adopted. She found my clinic on the recommendation of one of the older patients I had seen. These are the fruits of a job well done.
We talked for a few minutes, and she told me about a problem with odors, particularly strong smells, without going into much detail, except when she dejectedly shared her experiences with doctors and psychologists:
"... Autosuggestion, placebo effect, some of them even thought I was taking them for fools. A year ago I gave up, but my sensitivity is still there. My parents have done everything possible, but nothing works, even their patience has a limit ..."
And paused before adding:
"I do not want you to think badly of me, but coming here was not my first choice ... Why have a office above a 'spiritual center'? It's very suspicious." I stared at her and kept my disapproval to myself, but must admit, she had a point. On the first floor they do tarot readings, and on the second they practiced yoga and meditation. But the space was cheap, the owners reserved and not very curious.
She continued, "Even so, the transformation of Old Josh does not lie, he is a good person and seeing him free of those tics is impressive." Thank you, Old Man Josh. We set up a time from 5:30 to 7:00 p.m. on Thursdays. Her parents would not know of these consultations, if they did they would refuse outright simply from seeing the facade. Hye paid a month in advance out of the allowance her parents provided her. Our sessions would begin in two days.
First Session:
I'm sitting in front of her, I ask her to lie on the couch, close her eyes and get comfortable. I turn off the light, although the aluminum blinds let light rays in from the outside, the shadow of my body covers Hye. I take a breath and lower the tone of my voice.
"Hye, I want you to breathe deeply, as deeply as you can, feel how your chest fills with pure air."
Her generous breasts rose to a peak.
"Hold that air, very good, Hye. I'll count to five and you'll release everything. One. Two. Three. Four."
I wait a few seconds.
"...Five. Slow, Hye, very slow now, let the breath flow out of you very slowly."
I noticed how her diaphragm contracted completely before intervening again in her oxygenation.
"Again, Hye, please take a breath, more calmly than before, enjoy the air flowing through your nose, trachea and lungs, very slow, Hye, let your body and mind take a break."
She took longer than before, her head rolled slightly to one side, opened her eyes for a moment, centered her head and closed them again.
"Enjoy the pause, allow yourself to relax your shoulders, your neck. Feel how your body seems to lose weight. Hold the air one more time Hye, count to ten and then release the air gradually. One. Two. Three. Four. Five. Six. Seven. Eight. Nine."
"...Ten. That's how it is done, Hye. You're doing very well. "
I continued with the breathing exercises for half an hour, giving her positive reinforcement, and changing the rhythm between taking in and letting out a breath, to distract her conscious mind. The last ten minutes I stop calling her by her name so often, to focus on isolating her conscious mind and dissociating it progressively.
With her head laying to one side, her mouth ajar, and her right hand hanging off the side of the couch, the Hye that entered the office was ready for the second phase.
"Listen as my voice resounds in your head, as your thoughts gently murmur, 'more and more sleepy'. How do you feel, Hye?"
"... I ... I feel ... relaxed ..." She said, having some difficulty getting out the words.
"Relaxed girl, I sense your tiredness, it's what you feel, a great fatigue. In your heavy jaw, in your loose arms, immobile legs and chest rising and falling slowly, all out of your control. Your mind is dissolving like a cube of sugar in warm, clear water. Your thoughts become translucent, inert."
"Your mind is already dissolved and has pooled in the tips of your feet, your whole mind is in those ten little toes. All your sensations concentrated there, captured by the warmth that covers them, the sweat against the fabric of your stockings. There are centered your memories, dreams, ideas, emotions, your will and personality.
Notice now, it's impossible for you to know yourself completely, as the little toe of your right foot cools, something has been lost, some aspect of your mind is gone, and you can not do anything about it. The cold invades your paralyzed toes, leaving only a slight warmth in the big toe of your left foot. There resides the remainder of your mind. I'm the only one capable of saving you, Hye, do you want me to save your mind?"
"Yes! I don't want to disappear!" Her face contorted in terror.
"It's okay, but you have to take a risk, are you willing?"
"My mind is me, of course."
"Now your mind takes refuge in the tip of your big toe, although you'll remain calm, you probably cannot remember what your favorite color is. Do you remember, Hye?"
She frowned, forcing herself to remember. "... I don't! Oh no! Please save my mind!"