After hearing that graphic description of his wife's adulterous afternoon, Matt was surprisingly buoyant. He put his arms around her in a firm embrace, saying, "Damn it, honey, that was quite an experience! As I told you before, I sort of expected something like this so I wasn't shocked. Also, also as I told you before, it doesn't bother me a bit.
"Look, I fucked Jane, but there was no guilt because there certainly was nothing between us. She thought that I was Tony. I, for practical purposes, could have been screwing an anonymous prostitute. The same thing with Cindy – to her I was Lyle and to me she was just another female body. Well, to be honest, she was more than that, but you know what I mean.
"Jeff believed that he was fucking Millie, not you, and you, as I thought might happen, got in over your head in helping your client overcome his problem. It was just a physical event, with no mental intimacy between you. I would be far more upset and jealous if you were exchanging a loving kiss or, even, surreptitiously holding hands than what you did with Jeff! So, let's just forget that altogether. Leaving nonexistent guilt out of it, how are you feeling now?"
"Much better! However, as I listened to myself talking, I'm still totally shocked! Look, right now I really want to go up to the pool for a while. I need to just soak and think and put all of this into perspective." She had been nervously standing and pacing around as she talked, too uptight to sit down. As she got out her bikini and removed her coverup to put it on, Matt began laughing at her. Startled, Katie looked at him questioningly as if to ask. "What's so funny?"
Matt just pointed and, looking down at her thighs, Katie was startled and then joined him in laughing. "Oh, good heavens, I mopped everything off just before you came in! He must have put a quart into me!" They looked at each other, amused, as Jeff's cum continued to slowly stream down her leg. For Katie, it was both embarrassing and funny and it acted like a catharsis for her as she headed for the pool, more light-hearted than she would have expected.
For the next hour she leisurely swam around the pool and lolled on a deckchair replaying the afternoon event and her reactions to it. There was little conversation – none about that event. The same was true at dinner. Finally, when they retired to their suite and were lying in bed, it was time for a postmortem. "Ok, honey, you've been ruminating about your afternoon tete-a-tete with Jeff for hours now. What conclusions have you come to after all that deep thinking?"
"I don't know if 'conclusions' is the right word – analysis might be more accurate. The biggest thing is that I am totally shocked at myself. I still have a hard time coming to terms with the way I've gotten lost in sex the way I have. It happened with the Jennifer memory when he fingered me and came in my mouth. I avoided that this time when we tried the same memory – I stayed away from him. But, when he was frustrated and, I feared, going to pull out of the trance, I went ahead with the homecoming scenario.
I knew the danger and thought that I was in control. I intended to try the open hallucination technique and hope that he would accept an imaginary Millie as being real. I just wasn't prepared enough and I certainly should have given him time to see the imaginary Millie – really have him focus on her before anything really started – maybe have him sit with her or something to make her more real to him. I don't know if it would have worked, but instead I jumped into it right away without thinking it through. As a result, he didn't see the imaginary Millie that I wanted him to see, and, when he turned and saw me, I became Millie to him. He grabbed me and started kissing and groping me.
"Still, there was no reason for me to react as I did. I have no idea as to why it happened, but I was overwhelmed! He was already naked and I helped him strip me. I was as eager as he. It was a weird mental situation where I was completely lost in the action, but, at the same time, was aware of what I was doing. It's hard to admit this, but I knew exactly what I was doing when I sucked his cock. I remember wanting it, actually sucking and playing with his balls to get him to go off. The idea of pulling back when he started to come never entered my mind – I have absolutely no idea why!
"The only time that the idea of stopping things was that moment that I knew that he was going to enter me. My mind actually cleared up and I could have said 'jasmine' and ended it, but I didn't. I can't say that I decided to let him fuck me, but I certainly didn't stop it! I simply find it almost impossible to believe that I could be so overcome by what can only be called 'lust' that I could be carried away like that!"
"Well, facts are facts and you have to recognize that a very hot woman has hidden behind the upright, moral professional façade all these years! I have to admit that I am somewhat jealous in that I have never been ravished by the sex fiend hidden inside of you all these years!"
"Ok, wise guy, I'll ravish you later tonight and see if you survive!"
"I'll look forward to it! Now, back to reality. I'll admit that I am surprised – an understatement – at your behavior. In sex or anything else, getting carried away, being out of control, just isn't you. On the other hand, this is a unique situation. You're involved in getting a man sexually excited and able to perform, not in an office but in a bedroom. Maybe this sexual environment or milieu has made your mind sexually vulnerable.
"I don't know and, frankly, I don't care about the cause. I know that it really was not Jeff, himself, that got you so hot, just as with me, it really wasn't Jane. We can forget about that part of it. The simple truth is that you've been fucked, you obviously enjoyed it, so, the question is, do you want to do it again?"
"Yeah! Obviously, that has crossed my mind. The simple truth is that I don't know. I'm ambivalent. Having you neutral on the subject – and you've convinced me that you're not concerned – I'm sure that I would enjoy doing it again although it wouldn't be the same. This afternoon I was overcome and into sex before I had time to decide yes or no. If I did it again, I would have to decide positively that I was going to have sex with another man – real adultery and that word still has power. That might be difficult.
"This is what I came to while analyzing the situation. If the homecoming scenario – and me being fucked – worked and Jeff performs with Millie tonight, that will end it. My decision will be simple and, honestly, I will be pleased. I really hope that it did work and I will have made both of them happy. That will satisfy me professionally and personally.
"On the other hand, if it failed again or is only partly successful, I definitely will try again with the same memory or something else, with the very sincere effort to help them. That might, probably would, involve me having sex with Jeff again and I almost certainly would enjoy it. However, I have no major urge or compulsion to be with him again and, as I said, I hope that they are successful tonight. Happily, it's basically out of my hands without me having to make a decision!
