The job was interesting only the boss was difficult. She required Jim to work late on reports which she took the credit for when sending them to head office. He knew his time would come but when it did he was surprised how bizarre and complete his revenge was. As usual Mary informed him of a meeting with clients at the last minute on a Friday afternoon. She would pick him up at the tube station near the restaurant so all he had to do was go home and change. Luckily he had a change of clothing ready and the journey in both directions would give him a chance to get up to date with the client who was bringing his wife.
"Jump in, I don't want to hang around." She said as he scrambled into the passenger seat. Before he had the door shut she was off pushing into the evening traffic. Jim kept quiet, a tactic he had learnt from experience, it was better to find out what kind of mood she was in before starting a conversation.
They arrived before the client with time for a pre-dinner Gin and tonic. He was surprised to see her drinking as it revealed something of her nervousness, after all she was known for having such hard front. The smiles were polished on both sides as they sought some common ground, introducing each other, following the waiter into the dinning room. They reached the ordering stage and still no mention of business had been made, the whole atmosphere reminding Jim of being presented to prospective in-laws.
All four settled down to adjusting their bottoms into the plush seats sipping their first drink, except it was Mary's second. A mobile phone sounded and the two men patted pockets while Mary peered in her purse all three apologising. The buyer's wife seemed to awaken from a dream suddenly scrambling for the phone that was ringing. At first annoyed then excited she handed the phone to her husband looking on in fear. It was the baby sitter with the news their son had fallen down the stairs. In a fluster the buyer rose from the table telling the waiter to get his coat.
Mary was obviously trying to get round to asking about the deal or another appointment only Jim kicked her shoe away and at the last moment she restrained herself. "I'm sorry about this we had better meet them at the hospital. Such a stupid idea leaving him with that adolescent babysitter. You've got the deal by the way. I'll call you tomorrow." The buyer said while wrestling with a coat sleeve. Mary held up well ignoring this last remark completely to make soothing and solicitous remarks over their son. They were obviously late parents and doted on the child which had now been damaged. They were between tables in full sail, coats flapping, toward the exit when Mary thumped her arse down onto the leather seat.
Before the door had swung shut she was ordering another drink in celebration. "Thank you, thank you, and I don't even have to suffer that fat bore for a complete evening. What a bonus. At the word bonus she shut her mouth and looked side long at Jim not wanting him to catch on about this extra sale meeting the target for an annual bonus. It would be hers all hers she thought. "Well let's enjoy the rest of this evening. There's some sort of entertainment I don't know what it is as Plastic Bob there," She shrugged in the direction of the door, "wanted this place for the meeting."
"Do you know why he's called Plastic Bob?" Mary smirked. Jim knew all right for he had read the file too but let her tell him anyway, just to keep the peace.
'Hell,' he thought, 'it's like being married to a nagging wife without the sex.' Or it had been up till now.
"His secretary told me. He phones his wife on her birthday and anniversaries from the office and tells her to put it on the plastic. It's amazing what us women can find out."
A magician came on to muted applause. Both groaned and quickly looked around to make sure they hadn't been overheard. The first time they had ever been in agreement on anything. It wasn't a large venue and the place had gone quiet as though everyone there felt the same dread. Three people enthusiastically clapping only made it seem more embarrassing, perhaps they were stooges trying to whip up enthusiasm.
The routine started with slight of hand magic tricks then a request for volunteers brought a groan from Jim. "It's a fix." She said.
"There's no way I'm going up on stage." He told her.
"He won't call us, it'll be some one he knows."
Waving her hand to prove a point she was surprised to be picked and with a devilish grin she pulled Jim up too. Hypnotism was the next part of the act and Jim involuntarily grimaced. He tried to relax for they were in the full glare of the lights on a small stage. Mary crossed her arms before her chest as though to say 'I dare you to try it on me.' She looked toward Jim beaming him a desultory smile. 'Oh thanks.' He thought. She'll be telling them in the office all about the stupid antics he makes me perform and making some up too. She was the type to suggest something awful for him to do.
Jim was thinking of the embarrassment rather than listening to the spiel until the magician told him. "Your not a good subject so you can help out. Don't let any of them leave the stage."
'Right!' He thought. 'Mary had been right, the fake would be using his cronies from the audience in the act.'
To his surprise Mary was standing lifeless waiting for the magician's order to perform. How did that happen, or was she pretending. The others were capering about in a silly routine with the audience nervously laughing. One fat chap was demanding of anyone who came close "Too much, I want it cheaper." Another victim was selling ice cream from an imaginary tray and it seemed to be melting from the way she was frantically reacting. She tried to sell her imaginary wares to everyone and the fat man made her particularly frenzied.
Is your wife a prude or is she game for a laugh?" He asked.
Knowing the man meant Mary, Jim answered. "Yes." Then before he could correct himself the man whispered in her ear. She came to life and capered after the others.
