Author's Note: All characters are over the age of 18 (in fact, all are over 25). This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to person's living or dead is purely coincidental.
--
"You going to tell me what was going on the other day?"
It was after his shift, but Ellie was still behind the bar at Shenanigans. Alexander was cooling down with a PBR.
"Nah," he said. "Just a thing."
Alexander had woken up the next morning, amazed to find that police had not broken down his door in the night. He hadn't put the ring back on, and had held his vow for four days now. He was feeling good about it, but the temptation was still there. In fact, he had taken to carrying it around in his pocket. He imagined himself a modern day Bilbo Baggins, except instead of turning him invisible, this ring would give him amazing powers.
But all he had to do was remember that look on Monica's face before she left. That look of brokenness.
Alexander was actually somewhat sorry that he hadn't gotten any identifying information from Monica, as he kind of wanted to check in and see if she was ok.
But he hadn't. He had to let it go.
"Hang out a bit," Ellie said. "It should be quieting down soon, and I'm not done with you yet."
"I like the sound of that," he said, grinning.
And this was the thing. He hadn't put the ring back on, but even so, he had a new bounce in his step. He found he could mouth off to the second chef and just get a laugh, instead of a reprimand. He gave his regular barista a wink, and got a shy glance back, instead of the stink-eye he expected.
Was it because of the ring? Or was it not giving a fuck, now that he had proven himself a worthless human being once and for all? Or had not waking up in a prison cell gone to his head?
He had plenty of time for thinking it through while making plate after plate of chickens marsala, francese, piccata, and madeira. Thoughts with no clear answer.
It was just about when he ran out of tinder swipes that Ellie leaned into her side of the bar, giving him an eyeful of her tip-inducing cleavage.
"That guy came in looking for you," she said.
A cold rush went through him. "What guy?"
"Is A for Asshole? That guy you were messing with. Or with his wife. What I can tell you: he wasn't real happy."
"I guess you didn't tell him where to find me, or I'd have been found."
"Nah, course not. Told him I'd never seen you before. But what the fuck was going on there?"
He felt a sudden urge to tell her. To confess it all. No: terrible idea. A good lie wasn't coming to him either. He found his hand was resting on the lump the ring made through the denim.
He went for the partial truth. "Look, it was something like hypnosis. I shouldn't have done it, and I regret it. I... convinced him to leave, and got her to pay for my drinks."
Ellie leaned in, making sure he didn't escape the radiance of her bosom.
"Bullshit," she said.
Alexander let himself be offended. "What? What's gotten into you?"
"I covered for you, and you think you can bullshit me like that?"
"It's true!"
"I have a very well attuned bullshit detector, and I think you are absolutely full of it."
"Why would you think so?"
"Because you look way guiltier than getting a couple of free beers. And when I said the guy was looking for you, you looked like you'd seen a ghost. I'm going to give you ten minutes to think of a better lie, or get the hell out of my bar."
She made her rounds, pouring some beers. Alexander quickly finished off his PBR. He was beginning to think that getting the hell out of her bar was probably the best plan. He should never have said anything at all.
But she was back. She placed a pint of hazy in front of him.
"I'm going to make it easy on you," she said. "You got into something like hypnosis. Yes, I believe it. I think that shit is real. But you didn't just get her to pay for your drinks, did you? I saw you two go out together. Either you are just messing around in some kind of swinger shit, or you really did hypno them, and you hypno'd her into bed."
"Christ." Alexander stood up.
"Do me," she said.
"Um, what?"
"Hypno me. Like I said. I believe it. Just prove it. Then I promise I'll leave you alone. I don't care if you seduced some uptown couple. I hope it was worth it. You do gotta watch out for them, though. The dude looked like he was capable of holding a grudge."
Alexander reached into his pocket, slipped the ring on his finger.
He didn't feel any change. There was no tingle, no special feeling at all.
"So, um, ok, what do you want me to do."
"Just, you know, put me under. That's what they say, right?"
"Stand perfectly still, right where you are," Alexander said. "You can try to move, but you find that you can't actually move. You can breathe normally, but your body is otherwise completely stiff, like you are made of stone."
She looked at him. Her pupils dilated. Her nostrils flared. He thought he saw a twitch of a grin.
"Ok, you can move now."
She leaned all the way across the bar, her ample breasts flattened across the wood.
"Ho. Ly. Shit. That was fast. How do you do it?"
"Magician's secret," he said. "Plus, you said you would leave me alone."
"I lied, A. I am never going to leave you alone now, not until I know everything."
Alexander's heart sank. "It doesn't frighten you that I can make you do what I want?"
She considered. "I guess it should, huh. Give any other guy at this bar that option, I guess we know where things would go."
She looked at him, appraising. She continued: "They'd go where you went with that guy's wife, wouldn't they."
"Look, let's just settle me out and forget about it ok? You covered for me, I am grateful. Let's move on. I... I did tell you I regretted it."
"Yeah, cuz you're a testicle. That's what I say instead of calling you a pussy. Cause a pussy is tough, but a ball's--"
"Yeah, I get it."
"Ok, so... you should be on stage. Or something. You still working at that midtown restaurant?"
"Yeah."
"Well that's stupid. You can obviously be making bank. Doing shows, or, I don't know. Crimes. You definitely should not be drinking PBR's after the dinner shift at whatever-your-place is."
"Probably true."