"So, did you still want to do this tonight?" Chelsea landed herself on the couch in the middle of his living room and basked in the newfound relief in her legs and feet, having spent what felt like forever in the shower. She fanned out her wet hair, took a deep breath, and recognized a familiar, smoky scent. Eyeing the side table next to her, sure enough, Devin had lit the candle pair that'd been sitting on their mantle for days - one tall, one short and stout.
"We should light these more when we... you know, actually fuck, yeah?" She joked, It's not as though she didn't feel uncomfortable, lounging around in only a bathrobe in front of the guy she'd dated for three years - and in his apartment, no less. They were no strangers to fucking, this blatantly sexy scene he'd set struck Chelsea as unexpected. The dimmed lighting, the candles, and cozy bathrobe didn't seem like Devin was trying to lead up to a relaxation exercise.
Devin set down his water bottle at the foot of the couch and sat next to her in his pajamas. "I just worry about candles getting knocked over during sex. When you're in a trance, you're not going to be moving around much."
"Is that what you learned in the videos you told me you were watching?"
"And literature, yeah. How-to's, scripts, stuff like that."
"So what do want me to do?"
Devin made a jokingly dramatic half-turn towards her, then hovered his hands over his lap, with one palm on top of the other, facing upward. "So! Start by holding your hands out, like this." After she copied his movement, he scooped his hands underneath hers, offering only a slight amount of support. The motion was firm and swift, but caring enough to keep her comfortable. "Keep your eyes focused on a spot on your palms." She decided on a fold in the middle of her right palm.
"Now take a deep breath all the way in," he added, his voice getting quieter, but nowhere near a whisper, "and hold it for a couple seconds."
Chelsea drew a long inhale, and her body stiffened as her chest muscles resisted her expanding lungs. She noted how the steady direction of his voice contrasted with his complete his lack of direction three weeks ago. She remembered opening his bedroom door to ask him when he'd be ready for dinner, only to find him still playing the same video game he'd been on since that morning. She'd immediately called him out for his lack of initiative, and while she couldn't put it to words then, she knew that it wasn't just about the game. His work life had stagnated for months. On rare days when his apartment was clean and tidy, the mismatched décor suggested he'd thrown up anything he'd purchased. And he'd probably even agree that there hasn't been enough attention on their relationship coming from him. In the few times they discussed the future together, he could never settle on any single plan.
"And let it out."
She blew out, noticing how high her slowly sinking shoulders had risen. Despite her body relaxing, she chided herself for getting distracted again with negative thoughts - it's a miracle that she'd been able to keep her eyes focused on her hand this whole time, which Devin was noticeably raising and lowering in time with her breathing.
"Now take another deep breath, alllll the way in, noticing the peaceful quietness of the environment around you."
Chelsea breathed in again, resolving to try and keep focus. He was right, the room was wonderfully quiet, especially after the sounds of her inhaling had stopped, and she could attune her ears to the wonderful silence. For a couple of weeks after their fight, it was silence. Devin had vowed to take some time to himself to straighten himself out and get his priorities in order, but as weeks went by, there was an uneasy, uncertain silence.
"And let it all out again."
Chelsea breathed out. It wasn't sexy, but it was damn relaxing, recognizing the unnoticed aches and tension in her neck and shoulders now melting away. She slumped into her guest robes, relishing the soft cotton fabric grazing her skin, and embraced the sensation of the weight of her body sinking into the couch cushions.
"Now one more time," he added, "take the deepest breath alllllll the way in..."
Chelsea breathed in again, slightly more invigorated, spirits lifted. A familiar air of excitement and curiosity returned. Devin had broken his silence yesterday with an invitation for her to come over tonight - the key was under the rug. When she let herself in, Devin wasn't home to greet her, but instead, a conspicuous, handwritten note placed on the couch demanded her attention.
On one side of the note, it simply instructed her to take a shower and dress in the provided bathrobe on the hook. Was his idea of getting his shit together just a bold proposition for sex? Not that she'd turn it down - she was usually the one to initiate - but this didn't exactly fulfill what she had in mind. She flipped the note over, which was much more detailed.
The note read, "I've recently been interested in learning hypnosis. I've been watching a lot of instructional videos on this, and I think I've been improving on something I care about. Something with a clear goal. If you'd like to be a part of it, I'll be home soon, and we can talk on the couch."
"Aaaaaand relax", his voice returned, in a soothing tone.
She let out her breath, noticing her mind now more at ease; less distracted, less stressed, and more in the moment. Was this hypnosis? Would a hypnotized person be this self-aware?
As if responding to her inner thoughts, Devin added "As you continue to breathe deeply like this, keep your eyes focused on your hand, and listen to my voice." Chelsea's attention, in turn, moved to her breath, her hand, and his voice, with each prompt. She briefly wondered how deeply she should keep breathing, but decided it probably wasn't that important.
He continued, "And as you listen to my voice, you notice how relaxed your body feels, and how the more relaxed your body feels, the more at ease your mind feels." Chelsea appreciated how the relaxed feeling in her shoulders had spread to the muscles and joints throughout her arms, her chest, her belly, and her legs. She felt a small sense of pride in already recognizing how her relaxation helped in focusing her mind.
"Let your body and mind be completely at ease, as you notice the weight of your arms getting heavier." It only made sense to Chelsea that her arms would feel heavy - after they'd been so relaxed, they could barely hold themselves up. And it made further sense to her that the sensation of feeling at ease was simply something she could let herself experience. A part of her wondered if she could experience hypnosis by letting herself be hypnotized. He said to let herself get this way, so maybe there was something to the idea of "letting" it happen.
"Now, I'm going to count you down from 5 to 1", Devin's voice intoned. There really was a wonderfully calming and trusting tone to his voice now, or perhaps it'd always been there. "And you're going to find that with each number, your body is going to feel heavier and heavier, and your mind getting more and more clear."
Devin began to slowly count, while humming sweet and caring descriptions of her increasingly relaxed mind and body - descriptions that she had full focus on, but lacked energy to meaningfully parse. The subtle swaying motion of her head, back and forth, in timing with her breathing, reminded her of sitting in a rocking chair, being rocked with every count by his soothing voice.
Breathe in, rock back. Five. Breathe out, rock forward.
