"Can we film the operation?
Is the head dead yet?
You know the boys in the newsroom
got a running bet.
Get the widow on the set.
We need dirty laundry."
-Don Henley,
"Dirty Laundry"
The Sovereign County and Nation-State of San Finzione maintained the European tradition of the two-hour midday break. It was often said that nothing happened between 12 and 2 in San Finzione.
On this day, though, something was happening at 12:22 in the afternoon. La Contessa's Eurocopter EC 115 helicopter flying overhead was a familiar sight to the citizens below, even if it was flying much faster than usual. A second helicopter in the sky at the same time flying from the nearby army base was not. What was even more strange to the people below was that La Contessa's only flew a short distance to the city's largest hospital and the second helicopter appeared to be heading toward St. Francis de Sales park. The park and St. Francis de Sales Cathedral at the end of it were a No-Fly Zone. Cameras and phones were produced to record the strange event.
In the park, Lady Maria Louisa Francesca de San Finzione sat on a blanket spread out on the grass under a shady tree by the duck pond. Her boyfriend, Stavro, was sprawled out on the blanket with his head in her lap as Maria peeled grapes and fed them to him, both of them laughing at how corny the sight of them must be to onlookers walking the paved paths at the bottom of the hill.
"Hey," Stavro told her between grapes. "Remember the last time we were on a blanket in this park?" Maria smiled and blushed. She thought she heard sirens, but thought nothing of them; figuring that Great-Grandmama must be going somewhere. She didn't connect them to the sound of the helicopter growing louder as well.
"I think we might get stares if we did that again today."
Stavro opened his mouth to respond and then saw the nearby park-goers looking up in the sky and pointing. He sat up, and Maria turned as well to see a helicopter that was not La Contessa's, but a military one, and it was descending to hover about thirty feet away from them.
The two of them rose to their feet as the military and police vehicles whose sirens had been getting increasingly loud could be now seen driving through the park and onto the grass toward them with flashing lights. They came to a stop and Capitan Ortega and four Ultimados, all carrying Heckler & Koch UMP40 sub-machine guns, emerged from an armored transport and ran towards them. Stavro stepped in front of Maria, memories of another incident they'd had involving men with guns and helicopters still fresh in his mind months later.
"Capitan Ortega," Maria shouted over the still-running engines. "What is all this?" Three of the Ultimados stood in a semi-circle behind Maria to form a shield. The fourth reached out to take hold of Stavro's arm and try to pull him aside when Ortega shouted an order to the man to halt.
"Señor Poldouris," he said, turning to Stavro. "I need you to stand aside. No one will attempt to take Lady Maria against her will." They had explicit orders from La Contessa in matters involving Lady Maria. That was one of them; there was a sub-list about Stavro. He turned back to her.
"There has been an attempt on La Contessa's life. I can only say more once we get you to safety."
Maria nodded and hunched down amongst them. Stavro, Ortega, and the fourth soldier closed ranks around her to make the front half of her human shield as they ran her into the armored transport. Everyone piled in and the transport and its escort drove swiftly toward the castle.
* * *
Susan Bailey was driving in the good direction for 4 AM Seattle traffic, and made it to the road that her home was on in a little less than half an hour. She'd found the BBC World Service on the satellite radio before she'd left Rachel's place, and had been listening for information as she drove home.
They'd reported that the attack had come during a stop on the castle tour, that the assailant had posed as a tourist and attacked her with a knife of some kind. They then said that La Contessa had been rushed by helicopter to the nearest hospital, that the castle was in lock-down, and that Lady Maria de San Finzione had been moved to a secure location. Susan listened to them rephrase those five details in as many ways as possible before pulling into her driveway and looking at the house across the street. A light was on in the house, like always. That would be convenient.
She got out of her car and started storming across the street and up their lawn. As her heels hit grass, she realized that the shoes she was wearing weren't good for storming up to someone's door in the pre-dawn hours with the intention of pounding on it and yelling, so she took them off and stuffed them into her purse before continuing to storm.
A use for the accursed shoes came to Sue as she reached the door. She took one back out of the purse and pounded on the door with it in one hand as she rang the doorbell with the other.
"Open up, you fuckers," she shouted. Susan worried for a second that Troy & Julie might've heard that, but then remembered that they'd be in bed, and all the bedrooms in their house had been soundproofed, so the repeat was much louder.
The door opened. It was Eric. His husband Rob was coming down the stairs. Eric appeared to be dressed as if going out for a pre-dawn jog. Rob was dressed as if he were heading to work in a jean-casual office.
"Susan," Eric asked. "What???"
"Look," she said, barging in past him. "You'll want to close that fucking door." Eric nodded and did it.
"All right, you know who I am, and I figured out who you two really are some time ago, so let's cut the shit; what's going on with her?" The two of them looked confused; a fraction of a second too late for her liking.
"Who," Rob asked. "The lady on the TV? We were just watching that."
