Chapter Six: A Woman Dismantled
I am a disease.
You see, I've always been a visual girl. Back when I was in the fullness of my power, I used to imagine myself darting through campus with a purpose. Untouchable, changing everything around me for the better, sending out ripples that wrinkled the surface of the sea.
Those times are long gone. Now, I despondently drag my feet through the halls, rooms, and grounds of this place. I no longer radiate positive and empowering changes, no. Instead, I am the carrier of a terrible pestilence -- so threatening and insidious that it is more a curse, than a mere disease.
Submission.
The word echoes over and over in my mind, as part of my programming. I turn it over in my head, looking at it from every angle, repeating it so often that it almost starts to lose meaning.
I associate it with images now, because unfortunately, I'm a visual girl. I see all the girls I've changed, their confident expressions softening, their determined postures becoming insecure and unassuming. I see the feminism inside them eroding, replaced with docile femininity, the craving for the guidance of a strong, male hand.
I see all these girls -- former rivals, former friends, former girlfriends, and above all former feminists -- beginning to gravitate around Kevin, like planets around a dark star. All at my doing.
I see them slowly start to converge, drawing closer and closer to Kevin, more and more attentive to his needs, responsive to his words. I see strength becoming weakness, each girl turned from a fighter to a pet. They march to him, heads bowed and eyes glassy, like they're being inexorably pulled by an invisible leash.
I see myself among them.
The lowest of the low, the one responsible for their downfall. Resisting Kevin's hold on me is one thing, but now, with all four girls in the harem lording it over me on a daily basis, every single waking moment... my very sense of self is buckling under the strain.
This extends far beyond the harem. Every girl I meet on campus is programmed to treat me with disdain and disrespect, to think of me as nothing more than an available slut. They execute this to perfection, because of course they would: I programmed them myself, and I've always been thorough.
This is terrible enough in isolation, but it gets worse, so much worse. All the damage I'm doing to girls is only half the picture, after all. The first part of my punishment, beautifully cruel, but incomplete.
And the second part, well, the second part...
How did I not see this coming? I have supplied Kevin myself with the information he needed to start disarticulating my self-esteem. Of course he would do this. Of course, changing the women here on campus would not be enough, would only be the start.
Now it's time to change the men, too.
Like I said. I am a disease. I walk dejectedly all day long, waiting for any opportunity to spend five minutes alone with a male student. Anyone will do, really, even people I've never spoken more than five words to in my entire time here.
Then, my eyes catch fire, and their strength yields to mine, and I begin to reshape them. I make them a bit more confident, a bit more dismissive of girls' issues and opinions, a bit more aggressive, more dominant. I manipulate their sexual preferences.
I instruct them to see me as a willing recipe for ogling, catcalling, and groping. To never take me seriously again.
This is going to turn campus into a nightmare, not just for me, but in general. Soon, submissive girls who crave male approval will start interacting with confident guys who demand female subordination. Like a chemical reaction, it will change the entire composition of the student body. The filthy ideas in Kevin's blog will manifest in the real world.
How long before this entire education facility is turned into a caricature of one of his blog posts?
Of course, not all guys get the same treatment. No, Kevin was very specific about some particular cases...
After all, the first part of my punishment didn't just include changing girls in general. No, I had to specifically undo all of the positive changes I ever brought about. Kevin wants to drive home the message -- it's his power now, not mine. He can and will undo all the work I've ever done, just like he's undoing my lesbianism. He can and will dismantle all I've ever accomplished, just like he's trying to dismantle me.
One after the other, I visit every guy whose attitudes I ever found problematic. Guys who made sexist comments in public or in private, guys who openly ogled girls, even guys who had a reputation for harassment. I go before them, and set my eyes afire, and remove every single change I've ever imposed on them.
Their old, mysoginistic selves are restored... and then some. I turn up their aggression, their willingness to dismiss and demean and objectify women, their sexual appetites and preferences.
And then...
Then comes the apology.
One after another, I drop to my knees before them all. With a fateful thud after another, I lose another piece of the girl I used to be. I'm Serena, the militant lesbian with mind control powers, and over the past week, I've sucked cock for so many different guys that I've officially lost count.
I'm not allowed to talk while I service them. That would ruin the point of the apology, Kevin believes: proper contrition is best shown through silence, and atonement should come in deeds, not words. Besides, what else would a misogynist recommend? Seen and not heard, of course.
And so I mutely submit to these men, who were once instruments of my will, and put my mouth to work in their service.
Some of them do ask me questions. Questions like, "so what's up with this?" or "is this gonna become a regular thing?" or even, "wait, aren't you a lesbian?".
Forbidden from answering, I redouble my efforts, closing my eyes, swirling my tongue around the cock I'm worshipping, distending every facial muscle as I devote every inch of my lips to the eliciting of male pleasure. Humiliatingly, they get used to my silence after a while, and simply sit back and enjoy the treatment... or take the reins, and facefuck me.
Through it all, my programming supplies all sorts of helpful commentary. Isn't this the most fitting way possible to silence a feminist? Literally shoving a cock down her throat, cutting off every silly pretension, every shrill argument about being a man's equal?
Is there anything more synonimous with power than a male hand, pressing down on a woman's head? Pushing her to her knees, limiting her potential, snuffing out her ambition, communicating that she is not to go where she wills, but stay down there and serve? Directing her to a purpose more suited to her skills?
And the worst part?
It makes me so. Fucking. Wet.
I hate this, and I hate that I eroticise it, but I can't help it. Kevin's instructions are clear. I respond to male sexual authority, even if I still resist it. I haven't had a chance to cum in weeks, and with the constant background arousal eroding my will, it's becoming harder and harder for me not to sexualise this stuff, even without the hypnosis.
I'm undersexed, overstimulated, and losing control. Just like Sandra, I've been put in a situation where I am guaranteed to try and resist, but where I have none of the tools I would need to win.
Whose spirit wouldn't be broken by this? Here I am, kneeling in supplication as every single one of my accomplishments is mercilessly, methodically and systematically undone, and all I can do in response is suck cock like a good, obedient slavegirl. And I find it hot. And I can't even cum to it.
I am one of the planets, swirling around, chained to the dark star's orbit. Much like all the other women whose minds I've been poisoning, I, too, have been turned from a fighter to a pet.
Unfortunately, the easy part of my atonement is over. Now...
The real nightmare begins.
***
The moment Logan's features slacken, letting go of all resistance as the jaws of my power snap firmly shut around him, I find myself thinking of earlier times.
I've changed many people, over time. Some changes were small, some big, some meant to help, others to prevent bad behaviour. And a few changes were for my own benefit, of course -- well, a bit more than a few, perhaps.
But Logan... he was my first truly big project, back when I was still trying to plumb the depths of my power, understand how far I could push it, how thoroughly I could reshape another person's mind.
I remember how breathless I felt, seeing the totality of his surrender to me. Here was Logan, one of the biggest assholes on campus, completely helpless in my ever-tightening grip. His ideas weren't far off from Kevin's, but Logan was no scrawny, insecure incel, oh no. He was the quarterback, the jock from a filthy rich family, a job in finance already lined-up for him.
He only attended class because he needed the piece of paper at the end, and was sure to remind us at every single turn.
A joke never left his lips, unless it targeted those weaker than him. The marginalised, the poor, and of course, women. He was a shark in waiting, and always took every opportunity to rub it in our faces that he was born a winner, and we weren't.
You can see the appeal of testing the full might of my powers on such a fine specimen of male toxicity.
And it really was the full might. I didn't stop at dulling and undoing his misogyny, no, I really went to town with him. He quit the football team (and in fact, the gym, too) and switched to a more respectable hobby -- writing feminist poetry.
I made him into an artfully crafted, committed environmentalist, worried about the unsustainability of cars, and fanatical about public transport. I made him drop scotch, and adopt a fervent passion for craft beer. I made him so hopelessly bashful and insecure that he'd never be able to make the first move with a girl again.
In short, I subjected him to what he would consider to be the most emasculating conversion possible. Well, I suppose I could have replaced the craft beer with colourful cocktail drinks, but I found the former option really funny for some reason.
I morphed Logan into the very thing he and his family of rich sociopaths hate the most. It was one of my greatest moments: I'd just gained a new understanding of my powers, and campus had just gained a new woke activist.