Young people sometimes frightened me. I had been streetwise myself as a teenager, but the kids of today -- especially hoodies -- made me uneasy. It was, perhaps, the sheer number of them that intimidated me. That and their uniform, the obligatory hood, and the hanging out on street corners in all weathers. But when I had moved into this flat, the lady who lived next door to me had assured me the young people who loitered our street were good boys and girls. They even went to the shop and bought her groceries, she told me.
One afternoon I'm down the gym working out, when two of the boys come over to say hello. One of them is called David -- a really pretty, dark haired young man -- the one who had often smiled courteously at me and who I thought nicest. I think he is about 19. He is wearing navy sweat pants and a white t-shirt. They stand there shoulder to shoulder, very well behaved, smiling sweetly and talking politely to me, a fit, middle-class woman in her thirties. Neither of them swear, they are really minding their manners. I am a bit embarrassed having them stand over me while I exercise, so I ask David if he deals. He replies that he does, so I arrange for him to call round at 8pm when my husband will be at work.
David is very prompt. He knocks at the door and waits to be invited in. In my flat, if you walk straight ahead from the front door, you enter the bedroom. This is does and it strikes me as odd. He's on edge but he's not embarrassed. I realize then this is because he is used to hanging out in his mate's bedrooms when he's at their house. As I turn around he is standing at the far end of the bedroom, next to my books and CD's. He still has his hood up and looks like a thief next to my stuff. A thief in blue with with stripes.
I offer him a beer. We talk, and I make lots of eye contact. I make a comment about him playing football in the street and how fit he is.
"The girls must love you" I say. He laughs, and I am not sure what he is thinking so I take it a bit further. It has taken over thirty years for me to get this confident. Just like in the movies I say "You ever thought of sleeping with an older woman?"
David says "Do you mean you? You're not old? I think you're well fit."
"Good reply," I think.
I give him one of my sweet, girly, big-eyed smiles before he has the confidence to meet my gaze again. I keep on smiling as I move in toward him. He is taller than me and in silhouette but the closer I get, the more I can see the detail of his face. I take control and kiss him, softly cupping my hand around the back of his neck, feeling his soft stubble. All of a sudden, the energy seizes him and he responds to the green light he has been given. He looks me straight in the eye, searching to see if I mean it, if I really will let him go all the way, and I smile back as if to say, "Yes."
David is in a frenzy of sexual energy kissing me, feeling my breasts, kissing them through my clothes. I have pushed off his hood and I can see his naked head. He has beautiful dark shaven hair, thick but short. There are some scars here and there on his scalp, and I want to ask how he got them, but now is not the time to ask. He smells of medicated shampoo and a little bit of weed. His mouth is soft and kisses really well. My god, the girls must fight over him. They are not going to like me anymore.
Then we walk and kiss over to the bed, as I pull his clothes off first. I push him down onto the bed and look at his figure. I stand over him and keep him fixed in a gaze as I take my top off. When I come out from under my shirt he is staring at my pendulant breasts.