⠠⠧⠕⠇⠥⠝⠞⠜⠽ Love
Chapter 04
Author's note: Thanks to kenjisato as always. Wouldn't be here without him. Welcome all constructive comments. If they're just pointless, unfriendly nonsense, keep them to yourself, please!
You need to have read the previous three chapters to understand this story.
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Voluntary Love
Chapter 04
We lay exactly as we were, for a long time. If we were breathing, I could not hear us. Eventually, I spoke very quietly, "Oh I'm so sorry, cariad."
Jane just lay there. I decided not to say anything else, but be led by her.
"I need to go!" she finally breathed. She kissed me briefly on the mouth. There was not much passion there. "I'm sorry!"
"Don't say anything," I said. "You've got more important things to worry about!"
I meant that, but that still didn't stop me feeling like rubbish. Something inside me went very low. "She'll go back to him," came clearly to my mind and stomach.
We got out of bed and got dressed. Jane moved around the room, I guessed filling a case. "Okay, let's go downstairs," she said.
We went into the kitchen without speaking. The room still smelt vaguely of sex.
"Do your children know?" I asked, tentatively.
"Oh, shit no," she said, desperately. "I better ring them before I go."
"Do you want me to go first?" I asked, feeling very much like a spare part.
"No," she said, quietly. Then her arms were round my neck, and she kissed me fully this time, very sensitively and still passionately.
"I'm sorry, my lover. I might not be in touch for a while and..." She left the sentence hanging. "And we don't know what will happen then."
I let the silence drag, as we looked at each other.
"Don't worry," I said, hugging her and kissing her. "I'm here, if you need me."
She hugged me back. "Thanks."
She made her telephone calls. They were short. "Anyone would think it was my fucking fault!" she said angrily, finishing the second call. Then she took a deep breath. "I can't drive because of the wine. I'll get a taxi. I'll order you one at the same time."
We sat on the couch waiting for the taxi. I found her hand and she didn't move it away. When the horn went, we moved out. Just before she opened the door, she hugged me again, and kissed me hard. "I love you — whatever happens!"
The last two words told me what would happen, but I smiled back, "Love you, too."
I did not hear from her for two weeks. The logical part of my brain told me not to worry. She would have no chance to ring me if in the hospital, or surrounded by her family. The emotional part wished he would snuff it, and the other emotional part told me she would stay with him.
On the Monday two weeks after the Sunday, there was a cassette in the post when I got home. Remember this was 1990. No internet or email. I put the cassette in my machine and heard this.
"Hello David. Sorry it's been a while."
Her voice was husky, as if she had been crying. She was definitely emotional.
"Robert is still alive, just. They think he will survive, but not certain. If he does, he will take months to recover."
There was a break then, of at least a minute, where all I could hear was her breathing, and a sob, I think.
"I've got to stay with him, David. He needs me. He needs me to look after him. I married him in sickness and in health."
She was definitely crying now, as was I.
"I know this would be the time to leave him for you, but I would not feel right, doing it. And asking you to stay around is not right, either. So I won't see you again. I'm so, so sorry. I love you, will always love you, and am in love with you! Goodbye, sweetheart."
She was in floods of tears when she finished. I was crying, too.
I sat there, for no idea how long. Deep down, I had known this would be the situation if he lived. I genuinely believed she loved me. I did not blame her for what she was doing. Did I feel the unhappiest I have ever felt in my life? Abso—bloody—lutely!
I made a decision to get another job almost immediately. I couldn't stay in the town, even if she came back. I had to start again.
Amazingly, the very next day, I saw a job I wanted. It was in Wales running an organisation working on disability issues. This had become my main interest and it looked right. Managing a small team, pushing disabled people issues across the country. The office was in Cardiff. It would also give me the incentive to learn Welsh again.
So I stuck an application in, and on December 1st, started working there. I had been interviewed by a panel, chaired by the chair of the management committee, who would be my line manager. Her name was Mrs. Llywellyn. I guessed she was in her mid-fifties. She was a definite character. Very touchy-feely, even when she met me for the first time. She clearly ran the organisation, and everyone seemed a bit scared of her.
She was fine with me, but from our first one-on-one the day I started, I suspected something was going on. She asked me to come to her house, and when we sat down, she sat next to me on the sofa. And as the meeting went on, she inched closer; so by the time we had finished, our bodies were definitely touching. Nothing else happened, but I felt nervous. Having your manager come on to you, could be a problem. Also, given the state of my emotions after Jane, I didn't want a relationship.
Mrs. Llywellyn asked me what I was doing for Christmas. I was going home to stay with my family. She seemed disappointed, but said nothing. She did offer to introduce me to people who would be helpful to me, and also to take me to some social events, as she soon established I knew no one locally. She gave the impression she would not take no for an answer.
So in the new year, I got invitations to various things—concerts, plays, and social gatherings. At all of them, she introduced me to her friends, and she clearly knew a lot of important people. I also enjoyed myself getting to know people and the concerts and plays were all good.
At the end of January, we were at another concert. Just after the interval, I felt Mrs. Llywellyn's hand on my thigh. I didn't react, interested to see what would happen. For a good few minutes, nothing at all. Then, it began to move very slowly up and down my inner thigh. For minutes I didn't react, then opened my legs a couple of inches. She didn't do anything at first, and then very slowly, moved her fingers a bit further up on each stroke. Finally, her fingertip made contact with the head of my hard cock. Then her hand moved away.
Neither of us said anything. When she dropped me off at the end of the evening, she gave me the usual hug. Her left hand gave my cock the briefest of squeezes, then I was out of the car.
In February, there were more of these moments. All of them in a public place. A play or concert, or while hidden at a social gathering. Neither of us ever said anything. The hugs stayed the same, and always ended with a touching of my cock.
At the beginning of March, I decided to see how far this was going to go. We were at another play. Just after the interval, before her hand started to move, I put my hand on her thigh. There was no reaction. After a few minutes, I moved my hand up, deliberately pulling her skirt up at the same time. Again, no reaction. Over the next few minutes, I edged her skirt up, until it was over half-way up her thigh. When I slipped my hand down, her thighs opened.
Again, I paused. I did nothing for minutes, then started making slow circles with my fingers. Slowly, I moved the circling movement up. Her legs spread gradually, as my fingers moved.
And then I felt it. Strands of damp hair against my fingers. She had no knickers on. A couple of minutes later, I cupped her hairiness in my palm and caressed her lips. She let out the tiniest of gasps, then firmly moved my hand away.
At the end of the night, she hugged me and whispered in my ear, "Naughty boys who put their hands in naughty places get punished, not pleasured."