"This is another fine mess you've gotten me into." I found myself paying Ms. Minnie back for buying groceries pushing a lawnmower across her disheveled front yard in the afternoon sun.
It was hard labor taken out in trade that I would've much rather paid back monetarily, but my host would not be dissuaded helping out a little at the start mostly in a managerial role. Ms. Minnie was presently sitting on the front patio of her porch gossiping on her phone while having some cool iced tea.
My mind drifted to the blow up with Niecy as I screwed myself out of blowing an epic load all over her impressive knockers. For the slightest moment I'd nearly pushed inside her steaming pot, but immediately hit a brick wall. I kept pushing the lawnmower across the long neglected rectangular patch of frayed grass and dirt picturing her incredible body wishing I'd played the long game with her.
"HUH, OH FUCK!!" The mower suddenly got caught on something embedded in the grass kicking up a small dust cloud for a few seconds until I cut the power. Ms. Minnie was already running across the lawn like I was holding a live grenade as the mower shut off.
"Watch out, let me see it." I was unceremoniously shoved to the side as Ms. Minnie checked making sure the power was off before turning the mower on its side.
"I turned it off."
"Yeah but I like to be sure I ain't losing no fingers round here. Now you step on back a few feet that a way boy." I was offended at being treated like a kid, but acquiesced stepping back three feet or so. Ms. Minnie took her time getting down on her knees inspecting the underside of the mower.
"Just as I figured." She pulled what looked like a old railroad spike out of the blades examining it.
"What's that doing there?" I was curious because there wasn't any kind of railroad in the area and hadn't been even back in the day during my childhood visits. Ms. Minnie's face scrunched up as she stared at the rusty artifact suddenly tucking it away.
"Don't you worry yourself none about that; take this here mower round to the back. I'm gonna have to take it into the next town for repairing."
"Sorry ma'am, I didn't see it; was there a railroad around here back in the day?"
"MIND ME BOY, TAKE THAT MOWER BACK THERE BY THE SHED!"
Her demeanor was off putting but I followed orders like a good little soldier pushing the damaged mower back along the side of her house towards the shed. I glanced back over my shoulder finding Ms. Minnie stomping the railroad spike back into place underfoot.
She paid a little closer attention to my activities in the yard directing me to rake up errant leaves and shrubbery placing the refuse in a number of garbage bags.
Throughout it all, Ms. Minnie kept up a running conversation on her phone with multiple persons unknown while I toiled away sweating profusely.
"Hey Robbie, you hungry?"
"Robert, yeah." I corrected getting no reaction about the mispronunciation of my name whatsoever.
"What you want, some burgers?"
"I don't know, do you guys have a pizza place down here?"
"Of course we do Richard, we gots a real nice one couple miles outta town square. That what you want to fill your belly? A burger would go right nice with that pizza and you can get some extras too."
"Sure Ms. Minnie, thanks." It was obvious she wanted some burgers and I knew to just go with the flow. We walked over to the front porch where she presented me with a pen and a piece of notebook paper. I wrote down my order handing it over only to find her outstretched palm in my face.
I shrugged and Ms. Minnie followed up mimicking the action with her meaty shoulders.
"What?"
"GIMME SOME MONEY BOY!!" Ms. Minnie almost yelled point blank in my face exhibiting a visceral frustration that made me double up internally. I figured her attitude stemmed from the damaged lawn mower digging around in my pockets.
"Eh, sure ma'am." Luckily I had a random fifty in my pocket clipped from my hidden stash remembering Uncle Ed's instructions.
"GIVE IT UP!!" Ms. Minnie snapped up the dough walking off without another word. I watched her file into her vehicle and pull out burning rubber. Only after she was gone did I realize my scribbled order was still in hand.
"Bitch." Despite my irritation, I went back to cleaning the yard because their was nothing else better to do.
There was a floor model television in the living room but I found that I couldn't turn it on without the universal remote which was conspicuously missing along with my host. I guessed that Ms. Minnie figured I would slack off in her absence as I was distracted by a honking horn.
"ROBERT WHAT'S GOOD?!" Arnold was sitting behind the wheel of his pickup which I noticed had some peculiar looking tires in that all were thin spares. His girlfriend Daisy Mae was absent from the passenger seat which explained his familiar jovial nature.
"Hard labor."
I raised a plastic garbage can stuffed with trash as he got out of his truck leaving it in the middle of the narrow street. In the three years since we'd last seen one another, Arnold had added a good fifteen pounds of muscle to his torso while his legs remained comedically thin. He was wearing a white tank, baller shorts and flip flops and I couldn't argue with that because of the stifling humidity.
"Aw Ms. Minnie think she slick having you pick up her yard cause she got them tickets from the city inspector and shit. Lord knows her fat tail ain't gonna bend over picking up all this trash in the yard. She tried to get my cousin to clean up, but he flipped her off when she offered him five dollars."
"I'm not surprised."
"Don't tell her I told you this, but she got that dumpster over there after letting one of them city fellas get a piece."
"Bullshit."
"Serious like Robert, she thought the guy was gonna have some of them immigrant fellas come over and clean up the place. Heck last week she was taking a few shots at that dumb looking van them city inspector guys be driving round here checking up on stuff."
"They consider this place a city?"
"We got a mall put in at the edge of town and they're putting in one of them whole food stores next year like. Gonna be a lotta jobs round here for the people, probably more than uh, since that there can factory got closed down."
We shared a moment of silence in memory of his and Niecy's mother. She lost her life in a tragic accident and their step-father had run off with most of the settlement leaving the sibling s to fend for themselves.
I knew through family gossip that Arnold kept himself busy with a shit job just outside of Maplewood supplementing his income with handyman work. Niecy last I heard was in a nursing program at school, but now she'd hedged that bet for the intangible promise of tangent wealth through her idiot boyfriend Glendale.
"Be careful man, you should always worry when a whole food store goes up in your hood."
"Why?"
"Gentrification."
"What's that?" Arnold asked earnestly helping me dump a full can into the dumpster at the edge of Ms. Minnie's property.
