Therapy 108

Philip had sat himself down in the wing chair as usual. He was looking around the room. It had been a while since he had been here but even the pictures on the walls were the same.

"How are you feeling?" Stella broke the silence. "It has been..." she looked in her note book. "It's been six months since we last spoke. How have things been?"

He shook his shoulders, fixed with his eyes on a picture of a sunset, or was it a sunrise, he really couldn't tell the two apart?

"Last time you talked about your relationship with your girlfriend. The two of you were having difficulties communicating." She paused. "Are you still seeing each other?"

She glanced at the picture he was looking at.

"Is it Miss Stella now?" He finally broke his silence. "I noticed you are not wearing your ring." She looked at her hands, yes, that ring. She hadn't been wearing it for quite some time now.

"That's very observant of you." she smiled at him. "It's also quite private."

"Sorry, I didn't mean to..." he excused himself.

"That's alright. It was..." she paused, "It's been awhile now."

"How are you doing?" he continued.

"I'm fine, thank you." she said politely and smiled again.

Philip had always been impressed by her professionalism, her job was to talk to all these people about their problems. She was human too, she obviously had problems of her own. This was the first glimpse he ever had of her private life. Like a peek through a keyhole. He knew that behind a missing ring, there often lay countless nights of endless fighting, tears, betrayals, guilt. People also tend to drown their problems at work. She was probably no exception to that, but her job was to dwell on other people's problems and he couldn't help but wonder if that was really good for her.

"But we are not here to-" she started,

"... here to talk about you. Yeah I know." He looked at her and smiled back at her.

"How have you been?" she continued, "Are you still seeing each other?"

"Yes. Yeah we do." he said.

"And how are things between you now?"

"You know..." he rocked his head to the sides.

"Are you still having sex?" Her question was quite direct and a bit unexpected.

"Uhm, yeah. Yes we do Miss." He confirmed.

"And the fighting?" She kept looking at him

"Yes, nothing really changed." He switched position in the arm chair, leaning back, placing his elbow on the arm rest and rested his head against the back of his fingers.

"You know, part of her I can't be without, and other sides I really can't... stand."

"Can you tell me about a side of her you can't be without?"

Philip paused for a while.

"She is... the sex is good." he said

"Sex, is, good." she mumbled to herself as she was writing it down.

"Anything else besides the sex?" she continued. Philip kept thinking.

"She is pretty, she... you know, I love her." He paused, "We sort of have grown together, if you know what I mean?" Stella nodded.

"And what about the sides you can't stand? Do you want to talk about those?"

He thought about how patronizing she could be. How she used to compare him to other men, the comments she could throw at him, guys with expensive cars, fancy clothes, richer, more in shape, better looking guys. As if she knew he couldn't compete with them.

"I think she wants me to feel... replaceable."

"Do you want to tell me more about it?" She asked, waiting for him to continue.

"She is comparing me to other men, implying they would give her a better life, better in bed."

"How does it make you feel, being compared?"

"It's hurting."

"Does it make you sad?"

"A little maybe."

"Does it make you angry?" she asked, and Philip paused again.

"Yes, sometimes." he felt how his blood started pumping, just thinking of it made him angry.

"And, how do you handle that anger? Do you take breaks from each other?"

He was thinking for a moment.

"I sometimes..." he looked at Stella, "Sometimes it affects, you know, the sex."

"Sex? In what way? Can you describe it?" She observed him.

"You know." he shook his shoulders, "Harder, you know, like..." he paused,

"Like I wan't to fuck her brains out!" There, he said it.

Stella didn't know why she nodded.

"Does she..." she paused, "What do you think she..." She was surprised by her own inability to formulate the question.

"You want to know if she likes it." Philip filled in and Stella nodded her head in relief.

"Yes" she confirms

"Yeah, she does, she seems to enjoy it more. The harder the better, and I know she would do it just like that with those other men.Harder even, because they don't..." he stopped to think. "They don't love her the way I do, they don't care about her, they just want to fuck her, and... and she would absolutely love it." He felt his heart rate kept rising.

He noticed how agitated he got just thinking about it, her, with other men, all at once why not, she's got holes to spare, why don't they all just feed on his girlfriend, fill her with their big fucking cocks. Fuck her brains out, and cover her with....

"What are you feeling now?" Stella broke his spiraling thoughts.

"I don't know, anger maybe, jealousy I think." His eyes avoided her's.

"Anger and Jealousy." she confirmed, "Any other feelings?" She paused. "Arousal?"

"No, no, maybe... I don't know." He shucked his shoulders in an effort to shake it off.

"What do you think she would say if you told her how you feel" Stella stears back to protocol.

"I don't know. But I can tell you what I did the last time," he said and continued,

"Last time I... you know, went down on her, I did the Alphabet thingy, you know?"

Stella nodded subtly to show that she knew what he meant.

"I went down on her, and started to do that Alphabet thing. You know with the tongue." He made a pause. "I started to write letters... words."

"What kind words?"

"Bad words, you know. And... names"

"Names? Her name?"

"No. Like, famous people... at first"

"Do you think she noticed you didn't write her name?" Stella asked

"No, I don't think so. She seemed to like it." he continued, "I went on with other names, my ex's name, and my ex before her, girls at work... her sister."

Stella kept listening, this one was new to her. Such a dirty trick to play on someone. She couldn't help thinking about Her ex husband, had he done that to her? She remembered they used to do the "Alphabet thingy" too, he used to do that to her, and write sweet things like "I love you" or "Stella".

She especially enjoyed the lowercase L's going up and down, like a hundred of them.

What if He had actually been writing someone else's name?.

His new girlfriend, who she had caught him with in their own bed. Her name was Camilla.

Had he written Camilla's name on her? Both names contained double L's.

Would she be able to tell the difference?

"I even used your name too Stella" Philip confessed, and Stella froze and looked at him.

She couldn't stop thinking about it now. Had she been subjected to this. The more she thought about it the more she was starting to feel sick. Memories started to come back. Both good and bad memories. How his eyes looked up at her as he was down there, on her, pleasing her. Those memories always sent tingles... down there. making her nipples hard, so even this time, but now it was mixed with a sense of betrayal. Enjoying his lips against the most tender and intimate parts of her body, while he in fact Might have been betraying her right there and then, thinking of other women, writing their names instead of her's.

She was starting to fill up with contradicting emotions that confused her, she felt as if she was going to be sick, and still, she was starting to get... aroused, intensely aroused. Why? Was she turned on by the thought of being betrayed? Hardly. Or was it the fact that it's been so long since she had someone pleasure her like that, that even the thought of being betrayed in the process were turning her on.

"Are you ok Miss Stella?" Philip asked as he noticed her zoning out.

She stared at him, without knowing it, he had just made her lose her focus, her professional shield was down. She couldn't even make out her own feelings right now. She felt like she was on the verge of crying, throwing up, and starting to get horny, all at the same time.

"Stella?" Phillip touched her clenched hand. She looked at him.

"You used My name on your girlfriend?" she said. Philip nodded, revealing a feeling of guilt.

"That is such a mean trick, don't you think? Did you tell her?"

He didn't answer.

"What else? Did you fantasize about me, too?" She knew this wasn't professional, but she couldn't stop thinking about it.

He kept avoiding her eyes as she kept observing him.

"Were you?" she repeated quite impatiently.

He still didn't say anything. He felt stupid, stupid for doing what he did, not to mention stupid for telling her about it.

"Have you fantasized sexually about me before?" This question placed a lump in both their throats.

Him, because he was in fact guilty, oh yes he was.

Her, because she knew this was a wildly inappropriate question and she was on a slippery slope right now. The thought about her client, sexually fantasizing about her, added fule to the fire was already starting to rage between her legs, and now was making her wet. She wasn't supposed to get aroused like this, she used to suppress her feelings.

She had to make herself leave the line of inappropriate questions, when Philip replied.

"Yes, yes I did." The words went like an electric shock through her lower abdomen.

"I have been fantasizing about you, a lot." his words kept hitting her right in her pussy.

The sickness was starting to wear off leaving room for her all increasing arousal and she felt how she was getting all wet. She knew very well she couldn't give in to any of this, not with a client, certainly not in session. She would lose her license, her practice, the rest of her scattered remains of her life.

"I fantasized about eating you out." he continued, "You know, instead of my girlfriend."

The image of Philip eating her out flashed before her eyes, the image from both their perspectives, how he would have imagined how she looked down there, how his face was getting all wet, pressed against her, warm, pulsating, soaked pussy, how his tongue explored her most intimate, secret part of her body.

"It turned me on." he kept going, seemingly ashamed about what he did, "It made me hard."

The image of his hard cock added to the scenes already playing in her head. Her face felt warm, she tried to focus on breathing calmly, but it got increasingly difficult. She really struggled with her impulses now, she didn't want to lose her license, but a growing part of her wanted to just fuck it all, fuck her license, the practice... fuck him.

In her head her fantasy throw herself at him, tore off his pants, devoured his big, hard, throbbing cock, taking it all in her mouth, giving him the blowjob of his life, deep, deeper than she ever managed to swallow a cock before, making it really sloppy. Sucking on it, pressing her face down his lap and feeling... enjoying his hard swelling cock in her throat growing as she gave him the oral pleasure never seen before by man.

Obviously none of this was helping, it just turned her on even more.

She kept her fantasy going, she imagined grabbing his hair, pushing him down between her legs, tearing her soaked panties to the side and placing his face right against her wet, pulsating pussy under her skirt. She wanted him to eat her out, sucking her lips into his mouth, pressing his tongue deep inside her hole. Writing all the fucking names in the world in her pussy as she clenched herself around his tongue, squeezing her warm juices against his face, making him lap her wildly exaggeratedly pouring fluids. Make him humiliate her with all the names he could come up with besides her's.

The vividly sexual scene, the humiliation, all of it was turning her on beyond all of her imagination.

"Don't use my name unless you mean it!" She hissed at him through her closed teeth.

Philip jumped,

"I am sorry Miss, I didn't mean to..."

Stella was suddenly pulled out of her fantasies. As an action replay in reverse she was swept back to reality. She realized she had said that out loud, and an awkward silence followed.

"Are you ok, Miss?" Philip tried.

Stella looked at him, if he only knew, poor boy, she had just been fantasizing about him, she was so turned on it felt as her pussy was wetting through her skirt and onto the chair she was sitting in. She wanted to tell him to fuck her, shove his throbbing hard cock inside of her, fill her with it, to fuck her brains out, pound her acheing, soaked, pulsating hole... holes, she wanted him to do with her whatever he wanted, take her, take all of here.

To hell with her license, to hell with her practice, and her life were all shit as it were. Why shouldn't she just do it, give in to it. It felt as if it had been ages since she had a man inside of her and she was pretty sure Philip would follow her lead if she just gave him the signal. She would let him fuck her just as hard as he desired, taking out all his rage and frustration on her with his cock.

Philip did know! He was old enough to recognize all the signs she was trying so hard not to show. In fact, it had turned him on quite a bit watching her, trying to figure out what actually was running through her mind. Had she been fantasizing about him, in return?

His pants were all stretched around the large bulge that was now pushing from inside trying to get out. His heart was pounding. He tried to imagine how she looked down there, what did her pussy look like, what did she smell like, taste like. Was she thinking the same about him, about his hard as a rock, throbbing cock.

"Stella," he started, "I know... I can tell you are..." He stopped himself. How was he supposed to tell her that he could see that she was so horny she almost was crawling out of her own skin. And so was he.

"I don't want you to lose your license and everything. I know about all of that."

Stella interrupted him, she rose up and walked up to him. She leaned over him, courageously she placed his hand under her skirt, made him touch her, made him feel her wet, warm pussy behind her thin, soaked panties.

With her other hand she pulled him closer, and with a low pitched voice she said,

"Now, you wouldn't tell anyone, would you?"