I've had sex with two women in my life. The first was my first girlfriend, and the original love of my life. When you get together in school and survive that, college and university you start to believe it's destined to last forever. She was gorgeous, easily the hottest in our year at school. She was tiers above me and the only reason we ended up together is because one of her hot, popular friends sank a few levels to date a mate of mine and we were thrust into a new friend group together. From there I charmed her. What can I say? I couldn't win her over with equally good looks but there was no doubting we had a lot in common. She gave me a chance. In fact she kissed me first.
It was one of those relationships that looks unusual from the outside, but our friends completely understood. We shared so many hobbies and interests and our personalities matched up perfectly as we worked our way through school and then college. She was such a sweetheart, shy at first but she grew up at a quicker rate than me. She had ambitions and I was just lazier than she was. I was smarter than my achievements suggested and it looked to her at times like I was trying to live and enjoy life with the least effort exerted as possible. It was a valuable lesson and I never learned it quickly enough.
We got together at 16 and survived until 24. It was an incredible eight years, and then she cheated. I'm not looking for sympathy, just providing the tale as it happened. She snogged a guy on a work night out and it answered some questions about what she was missing in our relationship. I suppose we were coasting a little bit by the end and the spark wasn't what it once was but she was everything to me. At the time I tried to make it work but she stuck to her guns and called it quits. Back then it was hard to give up what I had always known so I worked harder to save our relationship than she did. If I could live that moment again I would have ended it the moment I knew she cheated but I didn't have that in me. It turns out she did me a massive favour.
The second person I have had sex with is her mum.
This is not a revenge plot years in the making but life works in mysterious ways and just like her daughter, she kissed me first. I'm innocent. I guess you can decide that for yourself.
Ellie and I broke up in 2019. Early summer I think it was. I had spent a long time with a girl miles out of my league and I think it set me up for failure in dating. I took a while out before giving it a go but when I did I had this target in mind of a girl who looked just as good as her. This wasn't realistic. There was no way I could back to back on worldies. I struggled to accept that it would probably never get that good again. The dry spell dragged on and I came off the dating apps for a while. My confidence dropped and I lost my way with regards to my fitness. I started to believe I would get back in the saddle when I felt comfortable in my body again, but that took a few years. Then when I got back into shape I realised that I only charmed Ellie because she was 16 and dumb.
I got used to a life without sex and just hoped someone pretty would take a liking to me at the gym or at a gig. I was coasting again, but this time on my own. But that's enough about me for now.
Ellie started a new relationship. I'm not sure if it was with the guy she kissed at that party or someone else. She's still with him today. Good luck to them. She's a nice girl and I'm not bitter. I did fuck her mum though.
The less fun part of the story surrounds her mum, Elizabeth. She goes by Lizzie. Her husband died about 18 months after I left the family. He had been ill for a little while. I didn't know it at the time but found out at the funeral. I had to go and show my face. He had basically been my father-in-law for a third of my life. I never married his daughter but I always felt very welcomed into their family. He was a great guy and didn't deserve to go so young. He was 54. Cancer. You know how it goes.
The funeral cured some or maybe all of the lingering pain between me and Ellie. She didn't need that hanging over her so I didn't show any sign of it. We talked about her dad. My parents were there too. It was like old times, but much more depressing. I didn't see much of Lizzie at the funeral. She had an entourage surrounding her at all times but we found a moment to pass on our condolences and she appreciated my family being there.
That would have been late 2020 and it was the last time I saw her until around two years later. This time it was on an app. It was quite a surprise. Everyone has needs but I didn't expect to see her profile pop up on my screen. I didn't swipe her or anything, as funny as I thought it might have been. I saw her in person a couple of months later. I was running along a local trail when I bumped into her and Ellie's older sister on a jog of their own. She was wearing the shirt for a 10k race in the region emblazoned with the year 2022.
"You're doing the 10k?" I asked her. "Oh sorry, is that last years?"
"It is indeed, but I'm running this year's as well. I managed to drag this one along this year too." Lizzie replied, squeezing Alice's bicep in turn. For the record, Ellie's sister is hot as fuck too.
"It's freezing." Alice noted, still perhaps not quite onboard with her mother's idea. She was right too. The early spring weather came with a chill in the air, especially so early in the morning. The ground was wet after an overnight shower, and small splodges of mud covered all of their running trainers. "Are you doing it?"
"I haven't committed yet." I answered, a little disappointed in myself for the lack of urgency. I had been running for a while now, much preferring it to the gym environment.
"Oh you should." Lizzie insisted. "If I can survive then you can."
"I don't know about that but I'm right on the edge. I'll work up the courage soon and book a slot."
She seemed glad to hear it and before too long we were saying our goodbyes and running off in different directions. It took me a couple more weeks but I paid the entry fee and got myself into a more serious training regime. Once I was comfortable running 5k I started to believe it was possible and by the time we arrived to the 13th of May this year I was confident in covering the full 10 kilometres.
The morning of the run I saw her again, and there was no Alice in tow. "She didn't bottle it, surely?"
"Oh she bottled it. She barely lasted a month." Lizzie looked like a seasoned runner. She had one of those hydration packs strapped to her upper body, a colourful and clearly expensive pair of professional running shoes and a pack of energy gels packed into her pockets. On the other side of the conversation was a guy with no water bottle at all who was hoping to survive on the water stations that were set up every couple of kilometres.
"I was going to say she should be ashamed of herself but she probably didn't realise her mum was Kipchoge."
"Is he the marathon guy?"
"That's the one."
"Do you really not have any of these?" she asked me, pulling a gel out of her pocket and holding it up to show me.
"I don't really know what they are. Or what they do." I couldn't have sounded more prepared. "Could I steal one?"
"Take a couple." she said, handing them over. "You need to tell me if they make a difference because I can't even tell if they help but I bought 25 boxes and I need to use them."
"You're addicted." I joked with her. The conversation was smooth. I was never really this talkative when I was dating her daughter but if the dry years had been a drain on my confidence in the dating scene, the same couldn't be said about my social skills. I had really come out of my shell and the shyness that once gripped me was no longer there. "I can run with you if you want. Take Alice's spot."
