Pete was old. He didn’t feel old, he didn’t think old, but when he looked in the mirror each morning, he saw a face older than he felt himself to be. It was perplexing.
But two facts reminded him daily, he wasn’t young any more. Each morning he woke up aching, and rolled out of bed. He had to stretch for several minutes to get the kinks out before he could start moving. There was that, and the matter of sex; a fond memory from the distant past.
Pete had an old boss once, who said he still chased girls, but couldn’t remember why. When Pete was young, he didn’t understand this. Now he understood perfectly. But he still liked to look at the ladies. He thought that must be built into his genes. Everything else might be a distant memory, but at least he still had his eyes.
The local recreation center had an olympic-size swimming pool, reserved for adults weekday mornings. When Pete retired, he and his wife started going there. It gave them some exercise, and something to occupy their time.
Most of the morning swimmers were retirees like themselves, and many made it a daily habit. A few serious exercisers swam laps, but most of the regulars congregated in separate groups of men and women, some exercising while they talked, others just treading water and shooting the breeze.
Pete had always been a people watcher, and he enjoyed speculating on the people who came and went. One couple was an enigma to him. Their names were Curt and Jesse. Jesse was upbeat and gregarious, Curt was taciturn, and private.
Curt was civil with others, but he kept to himself, and his manner didn’t encourage socializing. When he spoke to his wife, he was peremptory, and Jesse’s gaiety had brittle quality. Pete sensed there was stress in their relationship. Often, he saw Jesse looking at her husband with en expression that was a mixture of sadness and love.
Jesse was plump. When Pete first saw her in the pool, he thought she was typical of other women that age, but one day he watched her climb out of the pool, and his eyes widened. She had the broadest hips he had ever seen..
Her figure fascinated him. Her body was firm, not blubbery, her waistline well-defined, her massive hips swelling below, in an exaggerated heart shape. Her upper body was well-proportioned. As heavy as she was, you’d expect her ankles to be thick, but hers were thin and delicate. Pete searched for an adjective to describe her, but nothing came. There was something primal about her. Every physical characteristic that is essentially female, was exaggerated in her.
It came to Pete that Jesse resembled those ancient figurines of prehistoric Earth Mother goddesses. It made him wonder if the old carvings were modeled on real women, rather than idealized representations of female fertility, as commonly presumed. He was drawn to this woman. He began to fantasize about her, and was surprised to feel stirrings of his long-dormant sexuality.
A day came when the speculation and fantasizing ceased. He got up at his usual early hour, and left his wife in bed, sleeping quietly. When she didn’t get up at her regular time, he went to wake her. He opened the bedroom door, and a feeling of horror swept over him. She was unmoving, her eyes open wide, her body cool. She was dead. The authorities concluded she died of natural causes, a stroke or cardiac arrest.
Pete wasn’t sure how he survived the next few days, but with the help of friends and family, he muddled through, and began to pick up the threads of his normal life. Alone now, after many years as part of a couple, it was a major change. Pete planned to go back to the pool, but he was reluctant to face his friends. He remembered the discomfort they all experienced , when someone lost a spouse.
Two months passed. He missed the camaraderie, and one day, the need to reconnect outweighed his reluctance to face them. He went back to be welcomed like a prodigal son. There were changes, of course, some new faces, some old ones gone now, and he noted the single women in the group were looking at him differently. Some were speculative, some interested, and some seemed downright predatory. Curt and Jesse were both still there, Jesse looking strained now, Curt more morose than ever.
Pete slipped into the old groove, and soon things were back as before. One day, he noticed Curt and Jesse had stopped coming. Then he saw Curt’s obituary in the paper. He wondered what happened, but put it out of his mind. Weeks later, Jesse came back alone, looking sad and subdued.
Pete went to her, and offered condolence. They spoke briefly, then went their separate ways. He began to watch for her daily, and noted that her previous gaiety never returned. One day, he asked to take her to lunch.
“Why would you do that?” she snapped. He was surprised by her abrupt reply, and all that it implied, but he wasn’t giving up. He pressed on.
“I’m tired of looking at television alone over a bowl of canned soup. I need to get out of the rut. I think you do too. So how about it?”
Jesse was reluctant, but she was embarrassed by the bluntness of her first reply, and couldn’t think of a way to refuse without making things worse. She sighed, and said, “O.K.”
It was nearly noon, and Pete asked, “Are you ready to go?” She nodded. “O.K,” he said, “meet you in the lobby.”
They changed, then left together. Jesse was bristling. Wrapped in her own misery, she was upset at letting herself get roped into a luncheon date she didn’t want. Pete sensed her resistance, so he didn’t give her much choice. He just said, “How ‘bout The Diner?” She nodded.
The restaurant was nearby; family-style, good food, friendly service, a typical small, neighborhood restaurant, popular with the older set. Both had been there many times with their spouses. They went in and found a booth. The waitress knew them, and greeted them with a quizzical expression. “Hi Pete, hi Jesse, haven’t seen you two for awhile.”
Pete recognized the question behind her expression, and smiled. “Hi Mary Jo, we both were widowed several months ago. We decided to have a little change of scene for lunch today.”
Mary Jo was surprised. Her face fell. “Gosh, I knew you guys hadn’t been in for awhile, but I didn’t know anything like that happened. I’m sorry, I didn’t know.”
Pete smiled again. “Well, you know we’re not spring chickens, and no one gets any younger. It’s coincidental we were both widowed at so nearly the same time.”
During lunch, Jesse was subdued. Pete tried to draw her out, but only managed to coax a fleeting smile. She was down and depressed. He was concerned about her.
