The only point of contention between the Wolf and the Shepard is which one of them will get to eat the Lamb.
**************
As I limped into the Blarney Saloon, the noise level dropped with everyone craning their necks to look at me. Then turning away, putting their heads together, whispering. While sneaking uncertain glances in my direction.
I'd be guessing my reputation kinda took a big jump three nights ago when Little Joe Worster and his posse of goons came after me and in all, I'd won that fight.
Stepping up to the bar as the guys standing there moved out of my way. I dropped a five down and ordered a Michelob Porter.
Since I'd be the only one still standing. Still conscious and still able to form coherent sentences when the Sheriff's Deputies arrived. My story about that fight is the only one out there......So far.
The silly things people believe about my black-belt in Karate sure came in handy this time. Hooray for bad movies!
The bartender put the bottle down in front of me and pushed back the bill. I grabbed the bottle, twisted off the top, leaving the Lincoln as a tip. The cold bottle feels damn good in my swollen hands.
With a groan of pain from my bruised ribs I then turned towards the row of small tables under the front windows. Taking a swallow. Uh-huh! Cold and bitter, just the way I like it. For a second I held the sweating-ice cold bottle against the cut across my bottom lip.
Slowed down by the end-of-the-day traffic while driving my pickup down Main Street. As I was passing the Blarney, I thought I'd seen a couple of redheads in the windows and happily I was right.
'Cause as beat up as I am, it'd been too damn many months since I'd last gotten myself laid. I'm as horny as a traveling salesman! Getting an overdose of testosterone and adrenaline Saturday night, sure as hell ain't cooling me down none.
The Mayo twin sisters, Maureen and Bernadette, were sitting together at one of the small tables under the windows. They were two, well-rounded colleens with the bright red hair, the innumerable freckles, that pug-nosed Celtic farmwife look that gets my libido too boiling.
As I walked over to them, their spectacled sea-green eyes got round and their expression was two of sympathetic surprise.
"Good afternoon Miss Bernadette, Miss Maureen."
Pulling over an empty chair from another table, I straddled it with my arms on the back, facing them. Blatantly looking them over as I took another swallow.
Together they politely replied "Good Day to you, Mister Larry. Or, should One be wishing you 'Good Health'?"
As I chuckled, both Maureen and Bernadette had matching expressions of dismay at the damage visible across my face and the back of my hands. All the bruising and butterflies holding the cuts together.
"If the two of yah think whatall yah can see is lookin' bad? Mah ribs be one giant bruise. Lucky no broken bones or hits to mah kidneys. Or to mah pride and mah joys!"
I laughed, then grimaced in pain. I was very happy to have smartly taken the precaution of wearing my old football protective cup when those goon's boots were targeting between my legs.
Oh, I got my share of kicks back at several of them. I could feel the squishiness whenever I got a good kick or hit to their groins with my heavy, steel-toed work boots. None of them had been smart enough to suit up for this fight. They'll be walking funny for a while! Whenever the fucktards can get vertical out of their hospital beds.
The Twins just rolled their eyes at my bad joke and shook those bright locks of red about their freckled faces. Then looked down at their hands fidgeting with almost empty glasses.
Carefully turning the punching bag I'm currently using for a head, I gestured for a waitress. Still got a ringing in my right ear from where one or more of the goons managed to get in a good punch or kick or both. I don't even remember feeling it at the time.
Janey rushed over and I told her "Jan Sweetie, please to brangh us all ah refill." She nodded and gave me a brave smile "Shure thang, Lahrry."
By the way that's me, Larry Miller, the walking, talking bruise. Thug extraordinaire in shiny armour to rescue fair maidens and a not-so-fair brother.
Looking at the Twins she asked "Drahft Harpers for yah gahls, rahhht?"
Nodding agreement, both murmured "Glad to see you back to work, Janey."
We could see from her strained face that the last few weeks have been tough on her cause of that little prick Worster. She shrugged replying "Donnah know what hit meh worsed. That thar dahmn fluahnzah or mah nerfes?!"
Janey was the the ex-wife of my Uncle Sam's step-son Bradley. Who'd dumped her for Maggie O'Hannon. Then Janey was dating my second cousin Hank for almost a year. Being a fucking idiot, he bugged out of town when she became pregnant. Shortly afterwards she had a miscarriage and lost the baby.
Janey is now the girlfriend of Aztec Thomley-Miller, who owns this bar plus several other of the businesses along Forrest Road and Main Street. Making the two of them the latest targets for Worster's vicious intrigue and malicious tongue.
Aztec was a four year old Mexican-Indian orphan adopted by my Great Aunt Olive Miller and her life partner Auntie Francine Thomley. We pretty much grew up together, I'm maybe a month older. We've always celebrated our birthdays with the same party.
Aztec and I've always considered each other brothers. Since all the relations we have near our age is my sister Louise and a couple of female cousins, Melanie and Rachel. All our male cousins are more then five years younger or older than the two of us.
Janey brought us our drinks and cleared the empties. When I reached for my moneyclip, she placed her hand on my arm and shook her head in direction of the bar "Ahztek's gotcha cohvered, Shugar."
I looked around and saw his dark red face now behind the bar and I saluted him with the fresh bottle. He scowled back in response.
I know everybody got that stupid idea that Injuns perfected the pokerface but I've known. Hell! Lived with Aztec more'n twenty years now. Even from where I'm sitting, I could tell he was pissed that I'd deliberately kept him out of this particular fight.
Frankly, as this town's token colored, the cops would have been all over his redskin ass if he'd gotten involved. Even worst, he probably woulda beaten that little turd Joe Worster to death for threatening Janey.
In this state, a Mexican or an Injun or hell any Colored, killing a White man? Over a White woman? Aztec woulda done a Danny Deever for that, no matter how deserved or how provoked.
If somehow he'd of survived being arrested. Which, realistically, doesn't happen very often in these parts. Amazing how many melanin-endowed fellows wind up hanging themselves in our local jails......Considering how inconvenienced they were with all those perfervidly applied police bullet holes in them.
With Aztec, my blood-brother behind me, watching my back. I could relax and pay full attention to the two lovely colleens I was sitting with.
Like stereo, the two women waved at our gracious host "Thank you, Mister Aztec!" They actually got an nod and a smile returned from him. Then he gave me another scowl. Yehhp. He is VERY pissed at me! I tried not to laugh at him, it hurts too much.
Now the one on my right, I think she'd be Maureen. Is wearing a bright green, calf-length dress with puffy short sleeves. A paired row of large mother-of-pearl buttons from neck to calves in front.
While the woman to my left, I think she be Bernadette. Is wearing a saffron colored, silky blouse with lacy frills from the collar to the hem of the blouse. A large black patent leather belt with a big brass clasp engraved with a lyre. Over a below-the-knees, Jaeger Green wool kilt.
Dressed like this, they must have come right from work. They own and manage Mayo Office Leasing with a range of administrative services such as Public Notaries plus freelance bookkeeping and tax preparation.
I raised my bottle of MP and the Ladies their glasses of Harpers as we uttered "Sla'inte!"
They twitted me with "Tis a pity you can't be entered in the Ugliest Dog competition, Larry"
It's amazing how they manage to talk simultaneously. For a second I wondered if there was some way to test that phenomena with them separated from line of sight?
Expressing my brilliant wit, I responded with "Woof!"
" Oh Larry! One hasn't seen you this beat up since that last game against County Seat High School."
