The Handyman

Suzanne

I spent a leisurely week, catching up on my laundry, shopping, and other household chores I had been ignoring while I had been doing my best to 'service' the horny ladies of the neighborhood. At about seven on Friday evening, there was a knock at my door, and when I opened it, there was Suzanne. She looked like an older hippie chick, about 5' 6", with waist length straight grey hair with flowers woven through it, and wearing a peasant blouse, faded bell bottoms, and sandals.

I knew she was Dorothy's next door neighbor, and had been in an 'open' relationship with her longtime bisexual 'partner' Emmet, who Dorothy had caught in bed with her husband. She was holding a brown grocery sack full of what smelled like homemade Mexican food, and a quart bottle of tequila.

We walked into the kitchen, and I offered her a cold Dos Equis. She said, "Far out!" and started spreading out a repast that looked like it belonged at a Mexican Fiesta. As we ate and drank, she told me about her life. She had she dropped out of school and left home at sixteen in '84. She connected with Emmet as she was hitchhiking to California, and they ended up living on a commune in Baha for fifteen years.

That was where she learned how to cook the amazing tamales, enchiladas, chiles rellenos, and burritos we were eating. She said that Emmet and her traveled from coast to coast in an old VW bus until they moved back here, so Emmet could take over the family auto repair shop, when his father died fifteen years ago.

When we finished eating, she grabbed two glasses from the cabinet over the sink, poured a generous measure of tequila in each, held it up to toast, and said, "Let's Fuck!" She downed hers before I did, kicked off her sandals, dropped her pants, and took off her top, and looked at me as if to say, 'What's taking you so long?' As I was undressing as fast as I could, I took a good look at the lovely naked free spirit standing in front of me.

The grey hair on her head matched the fur under her arms and between her legs. She was slender, with not an ounce of fat on her save the large pendulous breasts that hang almost to her navel tipped with inch long brown nipples surrounded by light brown areolas that were about two inches in diameter. Although her pubes were unkempt, but I could see that her vulva was an 'outie', because her inner lips were the same brown color as her nipples and hung about the same length as her pubes.

By the time I got my boxers off, I was at 'full mast' and she said, "Oh Goodie!," and knelt at my feet as she tried to swallow my cock. I reached down and grabbed ahold of her big hooters, and started to maul them, causing her to choke on my cock, and release it. I used my grip on her boobs to bring her to her feet, and kissed her.

We opened our mouths and played tonsil hockey with our tongues until she broke our embrace and said, "Wow!"

I led her into the bedroom, lay her on the bed, and dove face first into the pungent forest between her legs. For the next half hour, I kissed, licked, sucked, and chewed, her large protruding labia minora, and clitoris. She had the largest clitoris I had ever seen, as big as my little finger, and sticking out about an inch. As I sucked on it, I was able to stick three fingers into her vagina, and after I gave her three orgasms, I climbed on her and drove my cock into her in one powerful stroke.

I fucked her as hard as I could through two more orgasms, until the spasms from her third caused me to unload into her. I rolled off of her, and she climbed on me, impaling herself on my still hard cock, where she rode me hard while I mauled and sucked on her monster floppy boobs and huge nipples. I lost count of how many times she came, but when I started biting her nipples, she started screaming,

"Oh Fuck, Oh Fuck, Oh Fuck, Oh Fuck," and collapsed on top of me when I started shooting into her vagina that was 'milking' my sperm from my softening cock. When she didn't move, and started snoring on top of me, I closed my eyes and joined her in slumber.

When I opened my eyes, I realized that it was dark outside, Susanne was still asleep, and my cock was still buried in her vagina, but it was getting harder. I watched as her eyes opened, and as she smiled when she realized my hard cock was still inside her. We moved together, more gently this time, and before too long, we had a mutual orgasm.

When we finished, I said, "Let's take a bath." and she agreed. As we were soaking in the tub, I asked her about her childhood and family. She told me that she was an only child, raised by her single mother in upstate New York. Her father had left before she was born, and the reason she left home because her mother's latest boyfriend had tried to rape her.

I asked her about music, and if her mother was a Leonard Cohen fan. She got a strange look on her face, and said, "Oh yea, she did name me after the girl in the song."

"It fits you, because I get the impression you've always been a wild child, never truly giving yourself to anyone." I said.

She smiled as she leaned in to kiss me, and said, "Joe, I think you are the only man I've ever met who gets me." She turned around and lay back onto my chest. I wrapped my arms around her and took her large soft boobs in my hands and started playing with her long nipples. She turned her head, and I leaned in and kissed her. Just as the water started to cool, she noticed my cock was getting harder, and she said, "Oh goody, let's fuck!"

I drained the tub, and by the time I had finished drying myself, Suzanne had already dried herself, and was on all fours in the middle of the bed rubbing her clit, and saying, "Arf arf arf!" I climbed on the bed behind her and slid my cock into her vagina that she had made ready for me. I started to pound her pussy, and every time I hit bottom, she yelled, "ARF!"

I continued to pound her from behind, and each of my thrusts was answered with a loud 'Arf' from my lover, and when we came together, again, she howled like a hound dog, and collapsed on the bed. I turned off the lights, crawled on the bed next to her, pulled the covers over us, and we fell asleep together until morning.

I had a weird dream that night about Suzanne and I fucking in the mud at Woodstock in the summer of '69 to Jimmi Hendricks playing 'The Star Spangled Banner' on his guitar. What made it weird wasn't us fucking in the mud, it was the fact that I was nineteen in '69, and she would have been only a year old then.

I woke up before she did in the morning, and was making what I call a Mexican omelet (scrambled eggs with green peppers, ground chorizo, jalapenos, and shredded pepper jack cheese) when Suzanne walked into the kitchen and busted out laughing when she saw mw cooking, wearing my wife's old apron. "What?" I said, "I don't want to burn my Pene Grande!"

She smiled and said, "Absolutely, it's just that I've never seen a naked man wearing an apron before. Whatever you are cooking smells amazing, what is it?" I told her what was in my concoction, and she said, "Oh, a Mexican omelet. The Mamacitas used to make them down in Ensenada every morning."

As we ate, she put a generous splash of tequila in our OJ, and I asked her, "Do you drink alcohol with every meal?"

To which she answered, "Life is too short to live it sober." By the time we finished with breakfast, I had a good buzz, and was horny as hell. After I cleaned up in the kitchen, I walked into the living room, and found Suzanne bent over the back of the couch with her ass in the air. When she saw me she said, "Fuck my ass, big boy.

I walked around behind her and when I slipped my cock into her dripping wet pussy, she turned her head with a puzzled look on her face. I smiled and said, "I can't stick this big thing in you dry."

I pulled out and drove into her ass so hard she squirted a little out of her pussy and squealed, "IEEEEEYesss!" I didn't give her a chance to catch her breath, and fucked her pucker relentlessly until she came and shit all over me and the carpet. I grabbed her around the waist and carried her, still impaled on my cock, into the bathroom, and deposited her in the tub. I turned on the shower and cleaned both of us off. Next I filled the tub with hot water and bubble bath, and told her to relax in the tub.

I dried myself off, and got the carpet cleaner out of the utility closet, filled it with hot water, and cleaned up the mess behind the couch. Luckily I got it cleaned up before it dried and set, and there was no spray on the back of the couch. I put the carpet machine away, and went back to the bathroom joining Suzanne in the tub.

She apologized profusely to me, and I told her it was no problem because it was easy to clean up. I told her it was my fault because I usually give the women I fuck in the ass an enema before I stick my cock in their 'back door'.

She laughed nervously and said, "I still feel bad because that has never happened to me before."

As I drained the tub, I asked her, "You really enjoyed my cock in your ass, didn't you. Do you want to try it again?"

She had a silly smile on her face as she said, "Can we?" I nodded as I got out the enema bag and filled it with hot water and soap. She bent over in the tub, and I flushed her out thoroughly, then replaced the hose with my now hard cock, and fucked her silly in the tub, giving her two orgasms and filling her bowels with a load of my own. When our legs could no longer hold us up, we ended up with me sitting in the tub with her on my lap with my hard cock still buried in her ass.

"Wow, my asshole hurts," she finally said.

I said, "I can understand why." And we both started laughing, causing my softening cock to slip out of her ass. We got out of the bathtub, dried ourselves off, and walked back into the bedroom. We climbed on the bed together, and started to kiss and caress each other. As I played with her breasts, she played with my cock, and soon I was lying on my back with her straddling my face, and trying to swallow my cock again.

I ate her hairy pussy, and she sucked my cock until late afternoon, finally succumbing to an exhausted sleep, and woke up around dusk. We went to the kitchen and at the rest of the left-overs from the previous evening's dinner, along with several beers, and numerous shots of tequila. We returned to the bedroom and spent until Midnight fucking and eating each other in every possible way. Because of the alcohol I consumed, my memory of what happened that night is a bit fuzzy, and when I woke up the next morning, I was on my back and felt her lips sucking on my cock.

When I opened my eyes, I saw her dripping hairy pussy within reach of my tongue. I decided to have an early morning 'snack', and before too long we were drinking each other's nectar. Next, we went to the bathroom where we played with, and washed each other, dressed and shared Mexican omelets for breakfast, and talked about out weekend. She thanked me for my 'services' and said she hadn't had as much fun, or been so sore from sex in years. We kissed, and she left, after which, I went back to bed and decided to sleep until afternoon.

Just before I nodded off, I thought to myself, 'Only two more horny women to fuck, and I can settle down to just making sweet love to my Zelda.'