The Fixer

How many people are there in the world who have secret desires that occupy significant periods of their thinking time? People who, for whatever reason, are not able to share their thoughts, fantasies and desires let alone act on them. Too afraid to do anything about them, or too restricted to do online research because of the inability to use shared laptops for fear of being found out?

Well the reality is that I was one of those people, a married 'normal' man who was sadly not able to fully share those desires with his wife. Sadly because she was (is) a lovely lady who definitely had her moments of intense kink and desire to have had needs fulfilled which was extremely exciting, erotic and loving. I shared with her the excitement of her trysts with a work colleague, an ex-boyfriend and a mature next door neighbor. I enjoyed immensely our love making after her extra marital sessions, hearing the detail of her cock sucking, how her tits were sucked and how her cunt was filled with copious amounts of spunk from her sex starved lovers. Intense and explicit yes. These were great periods. Sadly though illness robbed her of the ability to continue to enjoy such experiences and I guess I felt that I should not indulge when she couldn't. That's life.

My desires and fantasies of course remained and so I sought a 'safe' environment to pursue my needs. Literotica helped, there are some very talented authors out there who gift their talents. I particularly enjoyed email conversations with those who were kind enough to respond to my contact and to the replies of non authors, who like me, benefited from the erotic minds of others.

Interestingly (for me at least) I discovered that there was a population of women out there in cyberspace who were similar to me, who had the desires, enjoyed the erotica, wanted more but didn't quite know how, if they should or were too scared to do anything about it.

I corresponded with Sarah. She was 58, married, a grandmother whose husband focused most of his attention on his business and getting his handicap below ten. It happens I understand that, sometimes we can't see the beauties that sit before us every day, I'm as guilty as anyone. Sarah really wanted some cock, she really, really wanted to experience some different types of cock. Cock that would be highly excited by her, became exceptionally rigid because of her, cock that would explode with cum because of the stimulus that her mind and her body provided. That was her desire.

It was clear that Sarah had minimal confidence in her body. Sarah thought that because she was different from the young stick-like models that are portrayed in the mass media that there would be no interest in what she had to offer. I found this to be familiar and sad. Sarah, very nervously plucked up the courage to send me a picture, no face, she sensibly was keen to protect her anonymity. The picture showed her in her normal day attire, a brown top and jeans. Difficult to really say too much about the picture other than she suddenly became a real women rather than an email address. "Do I look really fa?t" she asked. "Does my skin look old and wrinkled?" she inquired. Ouch! This made me quite angry and sad, those artificial stereotypes are killers. She looked 'fine' and I attempted to tell her that she was a beautiful woman because of who she was.

Unexpectedly a picture arrived in my inbox' A picture of Sarah, kneeling, naked, face hidden, tits exposed. OMG! Seriously OMG, that brown top hid the most fantastic body. Sarah had fantastic tits and glorious erect nipples created by her nervousness of taking the selfie. She had freckled skin, prominent veins on her pendulous tits, a stomach that was not flat, arms that didn't come from a body building magazine. Yep that's right she really was beautiful. A real woman, a real woman with the supposed imperfections that woman worry about so much but the defining attributes that make them real, make them beautiful and incredibly attractive and I told her so.

Of course she didn't believe me, how could I possibly find her attractive with those blemishes, imperfections, wrinkled skin and globulous fat? It didn't really matter what I would write trying to tell her how fabulous her body was, how it made my cock very hard and how I would love to show her through the sacrifice of letting her have my cock, lol.

Sarah told me how she would love to be gang banged, to be used by multiple men. She didn't care what they looked like, anything would do so long as they used her body for their stimulus, filled her and covered her with cum and demonstrating to her that she did have some sexual value. But of course that would never happen because no one would find her attractive, too old, too fat, too ugly, All dreadfully sad and how I would loved to have been able to explicitly show her otherwise over and above telling her how much cum I had expended wanking over her picture. I was in no position to make that happen, the guilt of the online contact was enough, taking any further action, as much as I would have loved to, was just out of the question. For me.

I asked Sarah her opinion on putting her picture and a profile on an adult dating site. My belief was that most men would see what I saw, that she REALLY was highly desirable and the comments that she would get back would validate my hypothesis. Sarah was nervous, excited, scared but brave. She gave me permission to set up an ad for her, to share her picture and desires, not necessarily to act on anything that came back. In her mind nothing would, but she was hopeful but even, in the remote possibility that some weirdo out there found her attractive, she was not at all certain that she would progress anything.

193 views in 3 days, 67 friend requests, 34 messages plus the 8 individuals who had sent a message on each of the 3 days seemingly desperate for her reply. Hypothesis well and truly verified I proclaimed.

Sarah's head was spinning, she was utterly stunned. Oh my she was so innocent to her beauty, attractiveness and demand for what she had to offer, both body and mind. Sarah really could take her pick of whatever she fancied both quality and quantity and she so had no idea that this would be the case. Lol! So unexpected that she had scared herself, what had she done

To be continued subject to feedback...