How did it happen? I'm not really sure.
I'd been happily married for nearly 27 years. I met my husband when I was 16 and he was 19.
I'm not saying that I'd never looked at other men; after all I'm only flesh and blood. But I'd never had the urge to do anything about it. The idea of being found out was enough to scare the hell out of me. Besides, who on earth would be interested in me? That said; there were a couple of occasions in the past when the opportunity may have arisen. But I turned my back on those openings.
So, what was different this time? Well, I'll try to explain.
First of all, I should probably describe myself. I'm 5' 4". I used to be around 120 pounds, but since I gave up smoking 5 years ago I've put on about a stone. As a result I've filled out a bit. However, I still walk a couple of miles a day and do a fair bit of physical exercise at the gym each week. I also help run a junior hockey team. I used to be thin, but now I have what are described as curves. I guess that nowadays I still look reasonably attractive and I'm lucky that my golden hair has retained its colour β with hardly a trace of grey.
I was approaching 46 at the time, but most people assumed that I was in my late thirties. I tend to come across as gentle and have a habit of flirting with all men (nothing sexual β just general chattiness).
Educationally speaking, my qualifications indicate that I'm a bit of a dunce. In reality, I'm an IT Manager, who gets embarrassed when I'm called a genius (which seems to happen a lot) and takes great pleasure in correcting people who ask what subject my degree is in. I have an IQ of around 140.
Bryn had an impossibly high IQ. He was accepted into MENSA at the age of 15. He was a natural blonde with green-grey/blue eyes (honest). A wicked sense of humour was very apparent. Currently 28, he'd been married for 18 months and his wife was nearly 40. He was 6' 2" and powerfully built. A genuinely tall, dark, handsome man.
He worked in a department with a lot of women, almost all of who tended to wear low cut tops. If I'd been a man I think I would sometimes find working up there very difficult. As a woman, I hardly knew where to look. Well I did, but I tried not to.
I always had a bit of a laugh and a chat with the women when I was up there and assumed that it was like this all of the time. I discovered later that it was only that way when I was around.
"We figure that you'll probably disrupt anything that we're trying to do, so we just join in," I was told by a Manager!
Meanwhile Bryn was very unhappy. The people he worked with were back-stabbers and he was bored with the work. In fact, he had applied for another job and was about to be offered the post.
It all started pretty innocently. I'd made a change to the systems to try and prevent so much SPAM mail getting through and had sent out an e-mail to everybody to advise them of what I had done. To lighten the message up a bit I concluded by telling them that the phrase came from a Monty Python sketch.
Bryn sent a cheeky reply and said that he thought it was my duty to give chapter and verse on the sketch. I sent him a link to a website with the full script, saying, "Your wish is my command."
He replied, "Ooooh! Three wishes! Can I have a Parker Pen, a Stella Artois and a Mickey Mouse pencil rubber please?"
I sent back, "Wish. Singular."
"I'll just have the Parker Pen then, please."
I sent a link to a site selling pens.
That was the start. This sort of e-mail duelling went on for some time. It was a challenge to keep up with such a witty and fast moving mind. Then, one day, in an e-mail he said, "If I asked you out for a drink at lunchtime, would you say yes?"
I answered, "Probably."
So he asked and we went out for a lunchtime drink. We did this a few times. I enjoyed his company, but I was so innocent that I didn't read the signs that he fancied me.
I suppose I was to blame; one day I asked him where he stood on the thong question (I love getting men to talk about women's underwear!). He answered that, of course, women had to wear them nowadays (meaning he liked them to β but I'd already guessed that). It led him on to the obvious return question; what did I wear?
"Guess," I told him with a cheeky grin. "What about you?"
"It's your turn to guess."
I tried boxers, slips and Y-fronts without success. Then I said, "Oh I don't know. I give up. A G-string?"
"Almost right," he replied. "I wear a thong usually."
"Go on. You're winding me up!"
"Honest. I'll prove it if you like."
"What here? Now?"
"Yep."
And with that, he shifted round in his seat slightly, untucked his shirt and tugged up the waistband of his thong and proved it. This, mind you, was in the back of a pub, so it was a touch risky, especially as we were only two minutes from the office and there could have been anyone at all witnessing it.
Like I said, I had no idea of the effect I was having on him. I should have guessed when we went back to work. As I went to get out of the lift he moved very close and showed signs of wanting to kiss me. I didn't kiss him of course, but simply smiled and walked away.
Back at our desks we started to e-mail each other again. But now, possibly due to the alcohol, both our libidos were slightly raised. The messages got steamier and steamier, but it was OK. It was still innocent fun, using double-entendres. That was, until the message arrived at 5.30pm, in which he was actually asking me to tell him (in detail) what I would like to do with him. That was when panic set in. I didn't respond and all the way home I felt sick. How had I gotten myself into this position?
I got in early the next morning. I had decided that I had to send him a message telling him that I was sorry for leading him on, but that I couldn't offer anything more than friendship as my husband meant too much to me to risk losing him.
Call me an idiot, but I wasn't sure how he was going to react, so I went straight into my boss's office and told him what had happened (just in case of any backlash).