Now, a divorced woman with two adult kids in college. I was lonely and needed sex. A man to talk with and to lie on top of me, touching and sucking me. Then I would give it right back to him. My options were limitless, or so I thought.
I tried a few dating sites for the over-50 crowd. If I'm lucky, I might find a date who lives too far away or has no personality. So, I went out and bought a new vibrator and started watching porn. Somehow, I wandered onto a live chat site that had all sorts of naked bodies to look at. Well, this was new at least to me.
My marriage had been wild, sexual, and kinky. We didn't need porn or chat sites. This sexy chat site with live hosts was a world I did not know. Each person had their specialty, promise of greatness, or kink. I just marveled that there were so many men with hard dicks!
After looking through many pages of thumbnail photos, I noticed that only a handful of the men were smiling. I went back through, learning as I went along. I learned about tokens and watched people chat, some for fun and most for sex. Then, I stopped in a room because the man was smiling...due to his hard-on.
The next day, I stayed in rooms with hundreds of guests or users. I continued for a few days until I found a handsome man with a large following. He was nice, chatted with his guests, and put on a sexy show. The guests in the room responded to him. It was fun and engaging, and he was a pleasure to watch.
I was hooked on watching. Occasionally, I'd get pesky private requests to chat, which I deleted. I continued watching my favorite guy. Finally, I chatted with my preferred host, and he said hello, using my code name. It made my day! He was always polite, kind, and hot.
Getting bolder, I started checking out other rooms. I was not timid and knew what I liked. I did not start private conversations.
Then I found a few more hot keepers, a great-looking man with fabulous facial hair, a great sense of humor, and tattoos; a lovely and fascinating man who shared a kink with me; and another who chatted, requested songs from his guests, and danced. The men I followed had four things in common: they spoke to me directly, made me feel safe, were fun, and were welcoming.
The unsolicited direct or private messages continued. Finally, I took a chance and answered, I would type 'Hi'. Some messages were sexual, and others just wanted to chat. I was getting more and more courageous; I even flirted.
One day, I stumbled upon a room. The cute young man was fully clothed, with no sound on, and had a small following. It was not my type of room. I was leaving when I saw he typed hello in the private message area.
He asked where I lived, and I told him about three hours from Chicago, which was my standard answer. He typed Wisconsin. Somehow, he knew. He tried to guess where because he lived in Wisconsin, too. It was fun, but he kept getting closer to the truth.
His code name started with an 'y', so I tried to guess his name. Of course, all my guesses were wrong. Eventually, he told me his name was Luke. I typed, "My real name is Ann." Then he chatted, "Is it okay to call you Annie?" Our private chats escalated fast. We went just beyond flirting, eventually having cyber-sex.
Luke never asked directly to meet, although he indicated in different ways that he'd like to. When chatting, he would call me dear, sweetheart, girlfriend or love. He told me numerous times about how sad he felt when I left his room. Luke was so attentive that it made me feel good and less lonely.
I didn't know this my world would be turned upside down. Even if I knew better, I kept going to Luke's room. He mentioned his family had a lake house within a half hour of where I lived. I almost told him to meet me.
One of his regulars sometimes asked for a private show, which cost tokens. I would sign off when Luke left the room to give his private show. He always told me when he was going and asked me to return later.
I asked Luke about the private shows, what he did, and how much they cost. Now that I had some tokens, I thought I would make him happy. He gave me a general idea of what happened and asked if I wanted one.
"No," was my answer. Yes, my mind replied, I would like a private show, a real-life private show.
Luke wanted me to talk with his number one fan. We could be friends because we were both writers. The request made me uncomfortable. I even felt nervous. When I look back, it amazes me how manipulated I was.
"Now you need to join my fan club. You will be my number one." Luke pleads with me. The next thing I knew, I was in the fan club for three months, and Luke could not have been happier.
Then he told me that if we were to meet, we would first meet at a public place. Luke told me he had feelings for me, and other come-ons left me wondering, should we meet? Instead, I should have thought, get out of here.
"I could never deserve someone like you," he said after one of our hot cyber-sex romps. "Please meet me." Soon after this, I met Luke.
We found a halfway point between where he lived full-time and my farm. It took me over an hour to drive to the restaurant he chose. When I walked in, I immediately knew him. Luke had never seen me, not even a picture, he smiled at me like he knew me forever as I walked toward him.
My body shivered before I even got to him. Luke took my hand and pulled me close. "Nice to meet you, Annie. You look exactly like you said you looked. So pretty." His eyes met mine, and I could feel the blood pumping through my veins.
"Luke, it's good to meet you, too. You are so handsome, so tall," I said. He brought me around to the bench seat, and we held hands while we sat beside each other.
Our conversation never wavered, and now our meals were finished. I did not want to leave his side. "Luke, there is a bar across the street. I know you don't drink, but would you want to go in so we could continue talking?" I questioned.
