It was both a seachange and a career change for Megan as she moved up the coast to a regional city away from friends and memories. Five years before she had been deliriously happy- wife to Matt, a carpenter who worshipped the ground on which she walked and mother to Ellie, a carefree five-year-old who loved singing and dancing and baby Ted whose smile lit up the room and made everyone smile back in return. She taught violin to a small group of children from the studio Matt had built in their back yard and was contemplating returning to the stage in the city orchestra she had taken indefinite maternity leave from. It all shattered when Matt was driving Ellie to ballet one Saturday morning with Ted also in the backseat and they were t-boned by a drunk driver killing the three of them instantly.
Megan spent six months wallowing in grief before a friend from her orchestra introduced her to a grief counsellor who helped her start seeing light. She returned to the orchestra, but her heart was not in it. Her home was not the same, so she sold up and with the proceeds and Matt's life insurance decided to travel and try and work out how to reinvent herself. At 29 she discovered that travel was not all she had imagined. The men she met all wanted one thing and intimacy was the furthest thing from Megan's mind. It was in a small pub in rural England where Megan met Jill, a nurse from her home state. Jill had taken a holiday while her boyfriend studied for his medical exams. In two weeks they had travelled to the tip of Scotland and Megan had decided that she too would study to become a nurse.
Megan kept in touch with Jill throughout her studies and even travelled to Jill's hometown for a placement. It was no surprise given Megan's nurturing nature she was a natural nurse and was offered several positions once she graduated. With Jill's encouragement she moved upstate to her new life. Jill, and her now husband Brad, were the only two to know about Megan's past and Megan aimed to keep it that way. She yearned for Matt's touch and to play with her children at the park and kiss them as they lay asleep at night, but that life was gone.
Ten months into her graduate year and Megan was gaining a reputation as an inciteful, caring nurse and received commendations from patients and those with whom she worked. There was a fulfilment in her life that had been missing since the accident. She was used to being asked by her older patients if she had a husband and would always reply 'A very handsome gentleman, yes!' however the question always brought a tear to her eye and brought up memories that still caused pain.
Trainee doctors rotated throughout her ward. Some showed immense potential, some got on people's nerves. One such doctor was Will. Will was incredibly smart and had an air of arrogance. He appeared not to acknowledge nurses when they brought concerns about their patients to him and made them feel that they were not being valued when in reality Will's brain was working at a thousand miles per hour. Megan had had a string of stressful shifts with one patient deteriorating shift by shift and no one knowing what the mystery illness was that ailed him. She was holding onto the thought of a weekend off- a concert that evening in the park by a visiting orchestra, the annual medical ball the following night and a day off to recover and prepare herself for her next string of shifts. Towards the end of her shift she confronted Will with her concerns about her patient. As usual he brushed her off. Infuriated she approached her team leader who listened and counselled her that Will would be gone from the ward in a couple of weeks and she would pass these concerns onto Dr Brown, the consultant and Will's boss.
Megan had not tried to make friends in her new hometown. She had Jill and Brad and was not ready to open up to anyone else. She did not mind that she was heading along to a concert by herself and was rather relieved as she did not know how her emotions would play out knowing the final piece on the program was Albinoni's Adagio, the piece she had played at Matt, Ellie and Ted's funeral. Megan was surprised to see the crowd at the concert when she arrived twenty minutes before start time. She had walked down from her apartment with a picnic blanket and some cheese and crackers to enjoy whilst listening to the music. She found a spot under a tree where she laid out her blanket ensuring she was surrounded by singles and couples away from the families who had gathered for the music.
It was a perfect Summer evening and the sun was setting over the amphitheatre as the music was about to start. Megan had laid herself out on her blanket and was reading the program for the evening with her sunglasses on and sunhat covering her face when she heard a slight cough.
"Um, excuse me, Miss, would you mind if I moved your blanket slightly to sit here, it's more crowded than I was expecting?"
Megan recognised the voice and her heart dropped. She looked up and removed her glasses.
"Dr Will," she sighed, "No, that would be fine."
It took Will a few seconds to realise who she was. A sundress, hair down and sunglasses was not how he was used to seeing the nurses from work.
"I'm sorry, but I can't remember your name, but I think you are Brad and Jill's friend." Will stumbled out, his usual charm escaping him.
Fortunately, the orchestra started tuning up so there was no need for further conversation. The sound of the tuning took Megan back to her past life. She began thinking of Matt and a tear escaped down her cheek. A Mozart symphony started the program. Megan was impressed at the interpretation, especially the slow movement. At the interval she had forgotten she was basically sharing a blanket with Will. The murmuring of the crowd brought Megan back to the present.
"I was just going to grab a drink, Megan, can I get you a something?" Will asked.
Megan replied that she was fine thank you and had brought her water. As Will walked away she caught sight of his shapely butt as he brushed grass off it. She scolded herself for thinking anything about another man, let alone one who didn't respect nurses. Studying the program, Megan realised that a former colleague, Russell, was playing with the second violins. She knew she would have to seek him out after the show. She did not notice Will return to the blanket until an ice-cream was placed in front of her face.
"Megan, I owe you an apology and whilst I wouldn't normally talk shop outside of work, I brushed you off this afternoon when you indeed held the missing piece of the puzzle to room 17s illness. Dr Brown has severely chastised me." Will looked as though he had been rehearsing that speech in his head for hours.
"Thank goodness you have some answers for him, Will, I have been worrying for days about him." Megan replied as she accepted the ice-cream.
Will was perplexed. He was used to nurses telling him off or angling for a date with him and here was one who was simply concerned with her patient. As they ate their ice-creams. Will told Megan about how he had studied music at school and the Mozart symphony was one he analysed for his final exams and whilst he still enjoyed it, he could still hear Miss Crips yelling over the recording when they came to poignant parts of the movement. Megan started giggling and told Will that she used to play in an orchestra. Megan was surprised when Will explained that he too had played the violin and throughout his studies he played with the university orchestra. They talked about music until the orchestra returned to the stage. Megan enjoyed having someone to talk to other than Jill and she assumed that as her team leader had told her she would only have to put up with Will's behaviour on the ward for another couple of weeks.
Finally, the Adagio for Strings started. Megan was not expecting the emotional onslaught to hit her as it did. After a couple of minutes, she felt a hand on her arm and was passed a folded white handkerchief. She dried her eyes and looked over at Will who simply smiled at her. As the crowd cheered at the end of the program she thanked Will and told him she would wash and iron the hanky and get it back to him. Not knowing very much of her past at all, Will told her that would not be necessary and he understood how music can bring out emotions we have kept hidden for ages.
As she folded her blanket and was preparing to say goodbye to Will and try and find Russell to say hello, Megan was surprised to find Dr Brown and his wife walking towards them.
"Well what a surprise!" he exclaimed, "I told you to apologise to Megan this afternoon however I am now very pleased to see the two of you out together! What a fine couple you make too- Megan is the smartest nurse I have seen in a long time and she will keep you in line and I believe your care and concern you show for patients, which again you try and keep hidden from others will complement Megan's. But enough of that, how good was that Adagio?"
Will tried to make clear to the senior doctor and his wife that this was definitely not a date and Megan simply excused herself and said she had to catch up with an old friend. The truth was she was so embarrassed that anyone should think she and Will were at the concert together that she wanted to get home as soon as possible. As soon as she walked in the door of her apartment she dissolved in tears and messaged Jill, telling her she could not go to the ball the following night.
Saturday morning and there was a knock at the door. Jill had not slept a lot. She told herself it was the emotions of the music bringing up her past and kept thinking of Matt. In her head she smiled at the physical memories of Matt- the goofy smile, the crooked front tooth, the hair that was so curly he kept it super short and of course his gorgeous bum. She had met Matt when he was removing a wall at the rehearsal space the orchestra used. Having broken up with a bassoonist when he chose to move overseas to further his career, she had not dated for several months however with Matt it was almost love at first sight. Matt's van had parked in Megan's car and when she found him to ask him to move it he said he would only move it if she agreed to dinner with him. Dinner turned into a walk which turned into them both at Megan's flat and a night of lovemaking that shook Megan's world. They were married seven months later and two years later Ellie was born. Matt was a devoted husband and father and both he and Megan complemented each other. Since his death, Megan had not dreamt of being with anyone else and now at 35 years of age she was convinced she would soon be bringing in cats to keep her company.
Megan opened the door to Jill armed with coffee and croissants. Jill learnt of the antics of the day before at work and Dr Brown's comments after the concert and could not stop laughing.
"You know, Megan, Matt is dead and from what you have told me he would hate to see you lonely." Jill told her friend.
It was similar to what her counsellor had told her just before her big move. Be open to new people and possibilities. What Megan and Matt had was gone and learning to love again did not mean that what Megan and Matt had had was not special.
